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Gloucestershire towns to lose vital bank branches

There will be just one bank left in Moreton- in-Marsh after it was confirmed that the town’s branch of TSB was one of the 82 that are closing as part of a cost-cutting exercise. Stroud will also be losing it’s branch of TSB as part of the cuts that have seen the bank who have an operations centre in Barnwood seek to restructure following a series of costly IT gaffes. Since the takeover by Spanish banking giant Sabadell in 2015, TSB has been hit by a series of computing problems that has left customers unable to access funds for periods of time. Investment in their online operations will attempt to rectify those problems but it will force the closure of the 82 branches.TSB CEO Debbie Crosbie said: "With a trusted brand, modern platform, and national

presence, TSB is well placed to deliver - but we need to make changes to enable us to compete."The plan we're sharing today involves some difficult decisions, but it sets TSB up to succeed in the future. Taken together, these changes will help us to serve more customers, better, for the long-term." The Moreton-in-Marsh TSB branch will close in May while the Stroud branch will shut in June. It will leave Lloyds as the only bank in Moreton, following HSBC closing their branch in 2017 l

1. When computing, whatever happens, behave as though you meant it to happen. 2. When you get to the point where you really understand your computer, it's probably obsolete. 3. The first place to look for information is in the section of the manual where you least expect to find it. 4. When the going gets tough, upgrade. 5. For every action, there is an equal and opposite malfunction. 6. To err is human... to blame your computer for your mistakes is even more human, it is downright natural. 7. He who laughs last probably made a back-up. 8. If at first you do not succeed, blame your computer. 9. A complex system that does not work is invariably found to have evolved from a simpler system that worked just fine. 10. The number one cause of computer problems is computer solutions. 11. A computer programme will always do what you tell it to do, but rarely what you want to do l Murphy's laws of computing

I knew my Cheltenham friend was drunk last night, when he cooked a pizza at 200 minutes at 18 degrees l

A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well l

72 | December 2019 | www. punchline-gloucester .com

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