6 LAG U BOARD CELEBRATES PRIDE MONTH | BDO LLP
BY SHERV CHEUNG WHAT IS JO’S PRONOUN
WHY SHARE PRONOUNS? We tend to make assumptions about people’s pronouns based on their names (and when we’re in offline spaces, their appearances). Those assumptions are not always correct, and can cause very awkward moments. Consider the Skype meeting at which the host welcomes the presenter with “And now I’ll hand over to Sam; we’re really glad he could join us today”. Sam’s pronouns are she/her. Sam might be feeling frustrated, weary, angry, or alienated - depending on how often it happens to her! What she isn’t feeling is welcome. Where we can’t make those assumptions, we can become uncomfortable. What pronoun goes with Winter or Sky - or X Æ A-Xii? It can make people feel wrong-footed when they don’t know which pronoun they are expected to use, and embarrassed if they pick one and it turns out to be the wrong one. We all interact with people from a range of cultures and backgrounds. We encounter new and unfamiliar names all the time, so if you’re corresponding with someone that isn’t familiar with your name, sharing your pronouns in the first instance helps them to refer to you in the right way.
WHAT IS A PRONOUN? A pronoun is a word you use to refer to something or someone where you would otherwise use a noun in a sentence. In this context we usually mean personal pronouns (he/him, she/her, they/them), possessive pronouns (his/his, her/hers, their/theirs) or reflexive pronouns (himself, herself, themselves), though there are plenty of others. Pronouns mean we don’t have to use the same word over and over again. For example, if I say: I saw Jane this morning and Jane said that Jane had seen Michael and Jane didn’t think Michael was happy, it sounds quite stilted. Instead I’d say: I saw Jane this morning and she said that she’d seen Michael, but she didn’t think he was happy. DEFAULT VS CORRECT PRONOUNS Whilst we have expectations about the title and pronouns someone will use based on their gender, there isn’t actually a ‘right’ answer - certainly not here in the UK. For example, anyone can choose to go by any gendered courtesy title (Mx, Ms, Mrs, Mr, Miss, etc.). There’s not even a procedure to follow; you just start using the title you want and tell people. Similarly, there are no ‘correct’ pronouns. You don’t have to be non-binary to prefer they/them pronouns, or a woman to want to use she/her.
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