King's Business - 1967-07

¡ T A L K I N G IT O V E R with Dr. Clyde M. Narramore

Dr. Narramor», graduate of Columbia University, New York City, Is a nationally known psychologist. Ho is the director of one of America's

E M O T I O N Q. What is emotion?

A . Emotion is an experience or men­ tal state characterized by a strong degree o f feeling and usually accom­ panied by motor expression often quite intense. Any o f various com­ plex reactions with both psychical and physical manifestations as fear, anger, love and hate may result. In mental illness, the cause o f the emo­ tion may not be known to the person himself. Continual unpleasant emo­ tional stimulation may do permanent harm to the body because the body is kept at “ battle station,” ready for a non-existent emergency situation at all times. Q. I am a young mother with two small children. Our little girl is five years of age. She is very tender­ h e a r t e d , especially in spiritual things. Our little boy, almost three years old, is a busy, active youngster. % Our serious-minded little girl with­ draws into acting like a baby. She will suck her thumb at times and have a very sad and almost guilty countenance. When our little boy was about a year old, she started to show signs of jealousy. We have tried to express our love to her more and to give her more attention and times of cuddling — which she loves — but still the problem remains, and may be getting worse. Karen is very good in m a n y things. She makes her bed, hangs up her clothes, cleans her room and empties the waste paper baskets. We have tried to teach her to do jobs correctly, though not wanting her to be a perfectionist. One time she had some friends over and didn’t want to let them play with her toys be­ cause it would make her room a mess. She compares her brother's as­ signments to her own, although we have talked to her and explained that his jobs are easier because he is younger. Yet she doesn’t think Y O U N G M O T H E R W A N T S H E L P W I T H 5 - Y E A R - O L D D A U G H T E R

largest psychological clinics— The Christian Couns’oling cantor in Rosemead, California.

and my doctor prescribed trunquiliz- ing pills. I don’t like to take pills, and I feel I should be able to handle this spiritually since I am a Chris­ tian. What do you recommend? . . . . A . Would you have any difficulty in taking penicillin for a strep throat? Or aspirin fo r the discomfort of a cold and fever? I can anticipate that your answer would be, “ No, none at all.” As human beings we are body, soul and spirit. These three aspects of our whole person are integral or in­ terrelated, any one o f which may be­ come sick or ill and cause the whole person to be out of focus. Sometimes a psychological problem is as much beyond the control o f the individual as any physical ailment. Often emo­ tional problems dull a person spir­ itually, causing lack o f victory. God has permitted man to make many wonderful discoveries. Like anything else that God has permitted man to discover, drugs may be used either properly or improperly. It is true that the use of tran­ quilizers is different from penicillin and other antibiotics, which cure in­ fections by getting at the cause, whereas tranquilizers work only on the symptoms or effects. However, they do have a profound effect upon humanity. T r o u b l e d Christians should not reject the use o f tran­ quilizers any more than they should reject the use o f other medicines, but should be thankful to God that such drugs are available, and can make life more bearable through a trying period. Truly this is not the answer or the cure o f the problems. The cause is best handled through counseling or psychotherapy, such as can be found through the Christian Counseling Center. Then once the causes are determined and corrected, the need for tranquilizers ceases.

that we are fair. It is very hard for her to admit guilt and mistakes. Could she be feeling that she can’t meet our standards fo r approval? How can we find what the difficul­ ty is so we can correct it? I experi­ enced some similar problems as a child, and I know what she may be feeling inside. I want to spare her these feelings as much as possible. A . You are wise in doing this! Since you have experienced many o f the same problems yourself, you know what she is going through. You have two children in your family who are both very young, and you cannot ex­ pect these children to behave like grown-ups. It may very well be that you will need to keep watching your standards, as you may be expecting too much of this child. Some jealousy, o f course, is nor­ mal in children. We are all a little jealous of certain people, but evi­ dently this has gone beyond the nor­ mal stage. Parents can do their very best, and yet these feelings may continue to some extent. There are several things you can d o : one, continue showing affection to her. She needs to feel that you really do love her. The second thing you can do is spend some time with her alone. When you go some place, don’t take the younger one; other times when you can, take the older one; and each will know that you do care. Every week try to find a few things you can do with the older one all by herself. I f you and your husband cannot resolve the problem together, you should seek a Christian counseling clinic where your child may be test­ ed. T H E C H R I S T I A N A N D P I L L S Q. I have been emotionally upset because of distressing circumstances

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THE KING'S BUSINESS

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