“I need to g-go soon, my heart. The storm is g-getting worse.” My voice is still shaky; the sobs are still coming. My right hand reaches blindly to the side. Autumn’s hand catches it and squeezes. It’s almost like she’s still here. Almost like she’s actually sitting next to me alive and well. God, do I want to look at her. But I can’t. I don’t want her to leave me again if I do. “Okay. Please be safe, my love.” She squeezes my hand again before letting it go. The auburn shifts fully from my vision. The presence next to me stays. She just leaned back. Reluctantly, I stand and take a step forward. The bou - quet of flowers that I brought with me are lying on their side, knocked over by the wind. Carefully, I pick them up and right them against the cool stone. Autumn’s grave. The stone is cold and smooth against my touch as I run a hand across it. Water droplets run down the front of the stone, almost like it’s crying with me. “I love you, Autumn.” With that, I straighten and turn around to leave. Movement in the corner of my eye catches my attention. I turn to it without thinking. My heart freezes as the image in front of me registers. I turned and looked. What have I done? Autumn is standing in front of the bench and waving at me. Her lips, usually upturned in a happy smile, are twisted in a sad frown. Sad and accepting. She got my attention on purpose. She knew I’d turn to her. My tears fall faster at the realization. “I knew you’d never truly heal if this continued. You would just keep coming here, to me, and never move on. I couldn’t do that to you. I love you too much for that,” she says. Tears start to roll down her cheeks. Her translucent cheeks. She was always pale, but now it’s more than that. Her body is fully translucent. It’s getting more transparent by the second. No. No! This can’t be happening. I can’t be losing her a second time. “No! What if I didn’t want to move on? Isn’t that my choice?” I take a step closer to Autumn as I yell. She just stands there smiling at me sadly. Her already barely visible form is made more invisible by my tears. My eyes are essentially never-ending rivers blending in with the rain. How could they not be? The wind blows again. Autumn’s hair and clothes don’t so much as
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