A Friendship with Jesus through Grief
A Essay From Audrey Bruce
The same way that Jesus died for me, to protect me from an eternity without my father. He protected me from an eternity where death is final and separation is destiny. He conquered the conclusion of death. Death still comes, and we will all find ourselves face to face with the end. Jesus died so that when we are there, at our very end, there comes a light, a warmth, and a reunion. I found myself face to face with Jesus, who could handle my anger, who protected me, who died for me, who is a good Man, a good Friend, and a very good Father. My dad sings, “Holy Holy Holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was and is and is to come.” Tears fill his eyes and his heart swells. They sing of a reunion and honor the Man who bought it.
behind it. The power of the blood that was spilt for our sin. The blood that was spilt because He loves us, to save us. To save us from what, though? From sadness? No. From anger? No. From tragedy? No. We will be spared none of this. The power of the blood saves us from separation. I was always so confused by “Jesus wept.” Moved, yes, very deeply…but still confused. How could He grieve when He knew the conclusion? He wept because He felt grief. As much as He was God, He was also man. A real man with eyes, and hands that worked, and a mouth that spoke, and a brain that loved. He wept as He experienced the power of death and its effect on those He loved. He was met with anger, “You are too late.” “You let this happen.” Betrayal. Again the image of the slow dance and His betrayal came to my mind. I heard Him. “This happens in every dance I dance,” He whispered to me. The anger, the blame. How could I avoid it? All signs point to Him, this man who saw the dagger! Still, I felt compassion for Him. Loss is inevitable. We will all lose those we love, and we will all search for a reason. Jesus sweat blood before His battle with death. He felt the human emotion of fear. Of pain. Jesus hung on the cross, bloodied and bruised, for closeness to us. Because when the apple was bitten, separation became our life story. And so, Jesus died for our reunion, becoming His life story. Jesus bought our reunion. Because of the blood that the Man, Jesus, bled, I will see my father again. If my father had ever been informed of the pain I would go through, he would do all he possibly could to help me escape it. Once he discovered it was inescapable, he would find me, and he would keep me as close to him as possible, so I might be protected by him during my pain. He might hold me, though he sees the knife and cannot protect me from it, he would hold me. Given the opportunity, I know without doubt, my father would die for me, to protect me from pain. From loss. From separation.
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