Hegwood Law - February 2020

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FEBRUARY 2020

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THE BEST — ANDWORST — VALENTINE’S DAY GIFTS This Year, Give the Gift of Real Love

I t is Valentine’s Day again, and if you are lucky, you have a thoughtful partner to spoil, and to be spoiled by, this year. For everybody else — for all those gas station rose-getters (and givers) out there — this list of V-Day gift do’s and do not's is for you. V-Day Gift Do Not's If you can get it at the Shell station, folks, it is a bad idea. Reddit user u/Etcetera7 wrote that her partner stopped to pick up “… a single fake flower and a pack of peanut butter cups” on his way to her house. She reported she lives near the station these duds came from, and she had seen the fake roses earlier that same day. He did try again, though. Later, he picked up some earrings and a necklace. But if you think he redeemed himself there, think again! This Redditor did not have her ears pierced, adding insult to injury. Nothing screams lazy like a store-bought card with a canned message and your name signed inside. But Redditor u/Knowingcat wrote in 2012 that her worst V-Day gift ever came in the form of a completely blank card. Her significant other claimed he did not know what to write, so he opted for the worst possible choice: nothing at all. If you are going with a store-bought card, at least give your partner the dignity of a signature.

Another Redditor wrote they got a bottle of ancient perfume for Valentine’s Day. As if the complete lack of effort were not enough, this user writes she thought the perfume had once belonged to … wait for it … her boyfriend’s mother. Finally, u/Soon2Barmn wrote her father gave her mother a set of jumper cables for Valentine’s Day one year. Apparently, the offending husband was in the doghouse for a couple of nights, but about a week later, Mom’s battery died. Maybe jumper cables were not so bad after all! V-Day Gift Do’s It is always best to do something near and dear to your loved one’s heart, but if the heat is on and you are still not sure what to get, classic gifts like red roses and jewelry are good ideas guaranteed to keep you in your partner's good graces. And while we are on the topic of showing your loved ones you care, consider talking with them about your long-term plans this Valentine’s Day. When my former father-in-law passed away, he had not planned. My former husband had to spend weeks combing through years of accumulated papers. His father was meticulous in keeping everything, but because

he had not planned, all those documents only made it harder.

Instead of grieving his father’s passing, my former husband had to spend that time trying to figure out how he was going to pay to take care of my mother-in-law, who was not able to live alone anymore. It was heartbreaking. I see this sort of thing all the time in my practice. When people do not plan, the last thing their children have to do for them is stressful and difficult. Instead of focusing on treasured memories and the love they shared with a parent, kids end up focused on chasing documents and sorting through years of accumulated papers. Oftentimes, they end up spending money on things they did not need to pay for or missing out on payments they did not know they had coming. So, this Valentine’s Day, give the gift of real love: Make a plan. That is the best way to show your loved ones they are precious to you even long after you are gone.

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