Working Wives There are nearly fourteen million American homes in which both husband wife work and in which there are two pay-checks. In these families, possibilities are increased for strain over money matters. Probably the greatest danger is the feeling of possessiveness which each mate may display toward his and her separate incomes. Sylvia Porter, herself a working wife of many years, who writes a widely-syndicated column in the financial section of many newspapers, has some words of helpful advice on this subject: "Always remember it’s ‘our’ money— not ‘mine’.” Like every part of the marriage relationship, there must be a true sense of partnership in the matter of finances. Agreement should be reached as to the use and disposition of each income. The husband or wife who insists on total control of his or her own income, or of the entire income, is both selfish and immature, and endangers the compatibility of the marriage. One “ground rule” that we have established and found helpful in our marriage is the deduction of an agreed-upon portion of separate incomes which is each of ours to do with as we need or please— with no accounting to the other one necessary. Interest ingly enough, this secret private account has usually ended up buying a surprise gift for the other of a luxury item which he or she long ago had decided they couldn't afford! A “happy anniversary, dear!” surprise, perhaps! Budgets and Bottles The arrival of “Junior” often gives rise to a dis cussion of the problem, “Now we really must estab lish a budget." Most financial advisors agree that size of family or size of income, for that matter, have little to do with the need for establishing a budget. Often budgets are viewed with quite negative aspects because of early experiences with an overly-stringent, all too-unrealistic budget. In such instances, the bud get itself may produce tension and precipitate fric tion in the household. In its simplest form, a budget is a plan of dis tributing the family income in a way that is fair and equitable to all the members. A budget should be considered essentially a spending plan rather than a savings plan. It can be as detailed as a CPA ac count ledger or as informal as the portion of the checkbook (all too often forgotten to be entered by the other partner) of checks drawn. Whatever the system, the key words to remember are simplicity, realism, and workability. And don’t forget to plan for baby . . . as if you could! KB Taken from I Take Thee . . . by Gordon and Dorothea Jaeck, copyright © 1967 by Zondervan Publishing House. Used by permission.
These include attitudes and opinions about who should control the money, how it should be spent, what are necessities and what are luxuries, cash versus installment-buying, what we need first and most, etc. Where there are sharp contrasts in these attitudes and values, serious problems may result. Clues to some of these differences are to be found in the courtship and engagement period, but often they are overlooked. For instance, the husband may have come from a very free-spending type of family, while his wife’s family had inculcated in their chil dren strong attitudes of thrift and control. To the extent that these differences are recognized and worked out before marriage, later problems can be more easily resolved. Bankers, economists, government experts, family- service agencies, and marriage counselors have all written and spoken on the subject of how to under stand, control, and enjoy money. So have married couples— “voice of experience.” One couple gives to us four basic rules they established after repeated unsuccessful attempts to avoid arguments about money: 1. Don’t talk about money. 2. Don’t argue about money. 3 . Don’t carry it around. 4 . Schedule one rousing money fight every once in a while just to clear the air. Finding that their first few “fights” had so cleared the air that they didn’t have anything further to fight about, they established the last rule, which is worthy of attention: “Remember always that marriage is more important than money.” A financial adviser who for twenty years has de voted himself to running the fiscal affairs of many well-known professional men and women testifies that he has "learned to cherish one small but sig nificant word.” The word is NO. He urges us to rec ognize the tragedy which mismanaged installment buying can bring, and the often nightmarish results of perfectly honest people plunging into debt with little or no planning for getting out of it. Such a burden, he reports, has thousands of persons across our nation “ living in a state of perpetual anxiety.” All but forgotten, it would seem, is the wise Bibli cal admonition spoken by Jesus Christ in His memor able Sermon on the Mount: “Don’t pile up treasures on earth, where moth and rust can spoil them and thieves can break in and steal. But keep your treas ure in Heaven where there is neither moth nor rust to spoil it and nobody can break in and steal. For wherever your treasure is, you may be certain that your heart will be there too!”
10
THE KING’S BUSINESS
Made with FlippingBook - professional solution for displaying marketing and sales documents online