both the husband and wife can in dulge themselves and be selfish to the degree that it will cause an un happy experience. Here she is a beautiful 20 or 21 year old wife, married about two years. She is either expecting or has a small baby in her home. Her young husband comes home from work and finds her looking like a test pilot in a broom factory. He works all day where per haps there are six or seven “sirens” in the office. They always have their hair done up just right, wear tight- fitting clothes, short dresses (if they are not Christians). Essentially, these girls put their best foot for ward. They may go home and col lapse, but the young husband doesn’t see that. After eight hours or more in the presence of girls at their best, he comes home, thinking about that beautiful girl th a t he courted through high school and college. He drives into the driveway, opens the door and there she is, hair all askew, or in curlers, and the house is a shambles. She says, “Oh, I am so glad you’re home! Here, hold the baby.” Then she collapses! You say, “Well, she’s tired.” Yes, she’s tired, but do you know what she really is? Selfish. That may be the easiest way to live, but I’ll tell you a secret. It isn’t very smart. Ladies, let me give you a suggestion after counseling several hundred men. I have come to the conclusion that a girl’s attitude toward her appearance is very im portant. Get in the habit of looking forward to that time when your hus band comes home from work and be prepared for him. If you are tired, take a nap. Plan a nap. When you’re talking to the ladies next door or your mother on the phone, lie down on the floor, put your feet up on a chair, and let some blood come back to your head, or plan a regular nap while the baby is asleep, to get some evening energy. At 4 :30, if he comes home at 5:00, you should start primping. Put a little whatever you
put on your face to spruce it up, and put on a nice trim dress so that when you open the door with a big smile, he looks at the beautiful girl he mar ried. What will this do? This will spruce up your evening. Now, your refusal to do this is not only very unwise, it’s selfish. You indulge yourself in your tired blood routine, because it’s just easier to become complacent. I’ve seen women who have five or six children look as if they stepped out of a band box when their husbands open the door at night. That isn’t vanity, girls; that’s just good sense, motivated by gen erosity. What about the men? The average office worker likes to take his day off or his vacation to com pletely relax. He has to shave every day, wear a tie, dress up, so when he gets a vacation or has a day off, what does he like to do? Grow a beard, skip shaving and look like a bum. Men, may I give you a suggestion? When you are in the presence of the one woman in the world who is more important than anyone else to you, you ought to look your best. You don’t have to wear a tie on your day off, but if you want to give her a good affectionate hug and kiss now and then, (and if you don’t there’s something wrong with you), you don’t want to beard her to death. You want it to be a gracious expres sion of love. You say, “But it’s so much fun just to relax and not have to shave.” Yes it is, but of whom are you thinking, yourself or your partner? I am talking not about ap pearance primarily. I am talking about an attitude of life, selfishness. Whenever we indulge ourselves, we are being selfish! The Holy Spirit will replace that tendency if you yield yourself to Him. 7 There is victory in surrender when we allow ourselves to be truly conquered by Christ.
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