Reinforce the fact to young children that their loved one did not choose to die. In life, people are given choices, and some make bad choices, such as using alcohol or other drugs and then driving. These choices can hurt and kill other people. It is no one’s fault except the person who made the bad choice. Write down ways you answer your child’s ques- tions about death. If kept in a journal, these responses can be used later as a reference for future discussions. Communicate with school personnel, extended family, and friends regarding your way of explaining death. If they understand your philosophy, confusing mes- sages can be avoided.
Reinforce to children that their loved one did not choose to die.
Use caution when communicating with younger children, as they are concrete thinkers. Making statements like, “To die is to go to sleep” may frighten a child, fearing that if he/she goes to sleep that he/she will die too. A statement like, “Your daddy has gone away for a very long time” may leave a child feeling abandoned, and may leave him/her with the anticipation that daddy will return.
16
Made with FlippingBook. PDF to flipbook with ease