Why dads need to spend time with their kids
thers are generally better educated than sin- gle mothers and are better off financially. However, they tend to suffer more psycho- logical distress, as few of them are prepa- red to raise their children alone, and social recognition is often more difficult to obtain for a father living as a single parent than for a mother. One common problem is that daycare or hospital staff usually ask to talk to the mo- ther first. Men also face some persistent prejudices; an example is the general ac- As a father, you didn’t get the chance to experience the symbiotic relationship with your child during pregnancy the same way your partner did, but feeling the baby move in the womb certainly created a bond. And this connection can only increase by spen- ding time with the baby after birth, as you change diapers, give the baby a bath and rock her to sleep. But apart from caring for them, there are many other ways you can spend quality time with your children. Many mothers exercise with their toddlers in order to get back in shape — why can’t
fathers do the same? You’re not really in- terested in going for a run with a jogging stroller or taking yoga classes together? You could exercise by using your baby as a weight. And when your children are old enough, you could enjoy some parent-child workshops, or take a karate or swimming class together. Of course, you don’t need to sign up for a class in order to spend quality time together. Take a bike ride, go for a picnic in the park or spend a day at the pool; small shared pleasures are valuable too. If the kids are
interested, you could also pass on your own particular passions by teaching them to play the guitar, cook, play sports, etc. Research shows that the father’s presence is just as important as the mother’s. For exam- ple, it’s often Dad who helps his children discover the outside world and encourages them to move beyond their comfort zone, thus promoting their independence and ini- tiative. In other words, children and their fathers have nothing to lose and everything to gain from spending time together.
Single fathers: a rarely mentioned reality
The image of the single parent is still usual- ly associated with that of the single mother who raises her children alone. Of course, it’s true that mothers are still usually given custody, especially of very young children. However, single fathers, although in the minority, are no longer an exception to the rule. In fact, in 2011, there were 1,527,845 single-parent families in Canada, of which 327,545 (21.4 per cent) were headed by men. According to current research, single fa-
ceptance of a mother’s need to miss work for a sick child, while a father’s decision to stay home is dimly viewed. In addition, most services for single-parent families are oriented towards mothers. Whether you’re a man or a woman, raising children alone is never easy. But despite all the obstacles, being a single father is an es- pecially rewarding experience that’s made up of the thousand and one little joys of fa- mily life.
Whether you’re a man or a woman, raising children alone is never easy.
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