TAKE A BREAK
The laws of nature ensure children grow more independent as they age, and teenagers make far more decisions than toddlers. As older children form strong opinions on where they live and when they visit their other parent, it can lead to custody complications. A minor has limited influence on custody, but the parents and the court are usually wise to take an older child’s views seriously. A judge will begin considering a child’s opinion on custody around age 12, depending on their maturity. The older a child is, the more weight a judge will likely give their opinion, though the reasons for their preferences matter. A teen who wants to live with one parent because they’re closer to friends and extracurricular activities differs from one who wants to live with a parent because they’ll have a later curfew. A teen who can articulate why they think one parent can provide a more stable home environment differs from both. Crucially, a child cannot legally decide where they live until they reach 18. Until they are adults, their views are just another piece of the custody puzzle. However, the reality for parents can be significantly more complicated. After all, forcing a small child to follow a custody arrangement is much less challenging than coercing a strong-willed teen. If an older child refuses to visit one parent, the court often understands the other parent’s hands may be tied. A judge will consider the teen’s reasoning for refusing visitation and will attempt to determine if the other parent is exerting an undue influence. Except in cases of abuse or neglect, the preferred parent should encourage their child to follow the parenting plan, but attempting to force visitation could backfire. A parent whose child does not want to live with or visit them also faces a bind. When a child gets older and wants to change where they live, it’s natural for the primary residential parent to want to fight. However, attempting to force a child to live with you out of hurt or pride rather than concern for their welfare can seriously damage a relationship. We encourage parents to choose these battles carefully. If you have questions or concerns about your older children’s custody, Pacific Northwest Family Law is here to help. Call us at 564.212.2733 so we can review your options and determine the best path forward. A TEENAGE TUG OF WAR How to Navigate an Older Child’s Custody Preferences
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Some couples create a “parenting plan” for their pet. Often, custody of the pet will follow custody of the children. People without children might exchange possession of the pet weekly or grant one party visitation on weekends. These agreements can work in a genuinely amicable divorce. However, they’re not advisable when one or more spouses may be competitive, manipulative, or vengeful. Unlike a proper custody agreement, the courts will not legally enforce your plan for your pets. Sometimes, one person might make significant concessions or a cash payment in exchange for pet custody. This is a matter to discuss with your attorney so you understand all the ramifications of such a decision and choose what makes the most sense. Several states have updated their laws regarding pets and divorce to treat animals more like children, and Washington may one day follow suit. Until then, ensure you have an attorney who understands the law and can help achieve the best outcome. Call Pacific Northwest Family Law at 564.212.2733 to schedule a consultation today!
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