The Heartist Guide to avoiding Perfectionism. We know that everyone hates to be wrong. But some of us hate it so much that we equate all types of trying, learning, failing and anything short of perfect, with being wrong. A pursuit of perfection actually stops us learning. It stops us trying. It stops us from achieving our goals. Perfectionism is not about excellence. Perfectionism is about avoiding failure. Perfectionism is about our own self-worth – our self-talk tells us that ‘I am only valuable when I’m perfect’ – which is of course never achievable.
TERMS
WHAT IS PERFECTIONISM?
Perfection blocks Heartistry Perfectionism is an unhelpful but common trait where we strive relentlessly for flawlessness, set unreachably high but very subjective standards (‘my’ standards not ours) and then harshly critique ourselves and others for failing to achieve them. Perfectionists believe perfect is the only acceptable result. Being a perfectionist is the opposite to being a Heartist.
THINK
When we pursue perfection, we damage human connection. People aren’t perfect. Relationships aren’t perfect. So how can we expect imperfect creatures to deliver perfection.
102 | FOUR: PEOPLE HATE TO BE WRONG
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