Staying connected even when it’s hard.
TERMS
HEARTISTS NEVER EVER 'RIGHT-FIGHT’.
RIGHT - FIGHT
WHY DO I RIGHT-FIGHT? Right-fighters are driven by the need to be right. They have their value or self-worth attached to their rightness. At an unconscious level right-fighters believe that if they are wrong, they are deeply flawed as humans. So if people agree with them, then right-fighters feel ok about themselves, they can reassure themselves that ‘see, I am right. I really am a good person’. WHAT’S THE IMPACT OF RIGHT-FIGHTING? When we live or work with right-fighters we learn to doubt our capabilities and value. We feel disconnected. We feel continuously wrong. When we right-fight with guests, colleagues or anyone, we are telling them that our need to be right, is more important than making them feel valued. When we right-fight we create disloyalty, dishonesty and an ‘every person for themselves’ environment – which no Heartist (and no guest) will want to have any part in! I''m wrong
Right-Fighting is a mindset of doing whatever it takes to prove you are right. Right-fighters will sacrifice human connection, and often their relationships, while they argue the point until the other person agrees with them. It is the opposite of Heartistry.
WHAT IS SELF - TALK?
Listen hard. Talk back gently. It is the voice in our heads. It’s the way we talk to ourselves. Our self-talk can be very harsh on us – saying things we would never dream of saying to others.Take time to get to know your self-talk. Is your self-talk supporting and helping you, or is it throwing you under a bus every chance it gets?
96 | FOUR: PEOPLE HATE TO BE WRONG
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