6954 Boat Club Rd. Fort Worth, TX 76179 817-296-0670
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ClearWater Plumbers
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Broken Glass for Breakfast
Family Summer Fun!
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Get Refreshed Through a Quality Drink!
Broken Glass for Breakfast
Broken Glass for Breakfast ... continued from Cover
Well, guess what the boy genius (me) did?
In the midst of planning, I guess, I wore myself out with mental fatigue. I fast fell asleep … with the sealed glass stink bomb in my mouth. Don’t ask why. I woke up gasping for breath and heaving. I had chomped on the completely sealed glass vial in my sleep, and the prank went off in my mouth. All that thin, sharp glass was in my mouth along with whatever chemical potion that made it smell like farts and rotten eggs. My mom came running in to save the day. I don’t know how it was explained that I swallowed a broken glass stink bomb because I was all gag reflex and stink mouth. Poison control was contacted, and they instructed her on what to do. Mom grabbed two gallons of milk from the fridge and a big stainless steel mixing bowl. As my dear mother sped to Harris Hospital, I was drinking the milk and throwing it up into the bowl, dumping used milk on the street at the stop lights. I survived, and it was definitely worse than the Topo Chico bottle. I save pickle jars, mayonnaise jars, wine and tequila bottles, you name it. I fight my family to save odd glass recyclables like it is fine crystal. They let me keep some of it, and I have a good stash of repurposed
“vases” for wild flowers to give away to neighbors. I actually have a really hard time throwing away cottage cheese containers, too. I picture them full of screws and labeled with a Sharpie. Maybe I’m too practical … my poor family. As much as I love glass as a packaging material, I hate broken glass. I’m a barefoot guy. I like glass in the house and plastic outside. That is one reason I love plastic blender bottles. I have one with me all day. It is either filled with filtered water or coffee made with filtered water. Most people assume it is a protein drink, but no — it’s coffee. I haven’t broken a blender bottle yet, and they are so easy, very healthy, and good for environment. Plus, I don’t even think I could find a way to swallow any part of it. I’ll do my best to keep the glass out of my throat and keep the plastic out of the landfill.
–Jeff
Your ol’ buddy (aka The Boy Genius)
ClearWater Plumbers | 817-296-0670 | clearwaterplumber.com
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