Jerilynn Harris, Orchestra Curriculum Officer Orchestra@wmea.org
In the Bleak Midwinter: A Sufferer’s Guide
This time of year can be challeng - ing. A quick Google search of “post-
readers are encouraged to “step into a universe of possi - bility.” A universe of possibility stretches beyond the world of measurement to include all worlds: infinite, generative, and abundant. In the measurement world, you set a goal and strive for it. In the universe of possibilities, you set the context and let life unfold. Inverse to our expectations is our satisfaction. (Read that again.) How often am I dissat - isfied because I set an unrealistic expectation? And how often have I become un pleasant with students because of my self-manufactured disappointment? This pattern emerges more powerfully as a performance approaches. My expectation for where the students should be is not be- ing met, the error-detection voice grows loud, rehearsals become unpleasant, and for what? Again, I must redirect my inner dialogue, make space to be present with what is, and remember to do that thing that so many of us preach about regularly: enjoy the process! Being playful means being “fond of games and amuse - ment.” This is where we can take a note from our devel - opmental music colleagues. While the bulk of my teaching assignment is beginning and middle school orchestra, I also teach K-1 and 4 th grade general music. This is where I get to sing, dance, and act, where my affect subcon - sciously switches from benevolent orchestral overlord to basically Blippi (if you know, you know; if you don’t, just… don’t). Occasionally, one of my older students will come into the room to get their instrument as they’re leaving school early and will see me skipping around the room with a scarf and 20 five-year-olds in tow, or reading a story with ALL the voices, and they’ll look at me with that special teenage expression of, “Bruh, what?” I realize that the older students could really benefit from experiencing more of this side of me, especially when I consider the major transition they are making from childhood to young adulthood. When I remember to embrace playfulness in the orchestra rehearsal, everything is so much better. Yes, there is a time for seriousness and sobriety in rehearsal, but balance is key. Playfulness in rehearsal is most effective when the ideas are student-generated (this helps to avoid the “Bruh, what?”) and connected to the task. Why not ask something like, “How could we spice this rehearsal up today?” Plant a seed with a curious question like, “How would a person dance to this? What would it look like?” or “What would happen if we played this section like intro - verts? What if we played it like extroverts? Swashbuckling pirates? Meow it like a cat orchestra!” You can calibrate your level of play to the needs and temperament of your ensemble. Approaching technical or musical issues with curiosity and playfulness rather than a hammer and chisel
break blues education” yields 15,800,000 results featuring article after article with lists of tips and strategies to help students, teachers, and administrators manage the side effects of the holiday season. These tips include the typical self-care regimen of making healthy choices (boring), making plans with friends (better), and reconnecting with your “why” (beneficial). All these suggestions have their own merit and will likely be useful to anyone who imple - ments them in earnest. What I’d like to suggest here is my own mantra for getting through the Bleak Midwinter in the form of a good, old-fashioned learning target: I can be present, pleasant, and playful . Being present means “being fully conscious of the mo - ment and free from the noise of internal dialogue.” Well, okay. If there was a transcript of the noise of my internal dialogue in rehearsal, it might look something like, “Oh boy, their posture. Should I stop and correct now or remind later? BACKWARDS BOW! F-natural second desk viola! I can see bass player’s left thumb – gotta correct that next time I walk around. BACKWARDS BOW!! Sam’s vibrato is so tight. Josh is not doing vibrato. Sarah is doing ‘vibrato.’ When can I squeeze in another lesson on vibrato? BACK - WARDS BOW!!! The cellos are out of tune again. Where are the dynamics? Where are the accents? Where is my coffee?!” [Elapsed time: ten seconds.] Yes, I am fully con - scious of the moment, but the internal dialogue is keenly focused on error-detection/correction. If I remember to bring balance to my mind, the tone of the inner voice can shift from frantic and scattered to cool and collected. The error-detection voice speaks from a place of fear, of ego, of perfectionism; it wants my orchestras to sound good so that I look good. The cool and collected voice speaks from a place of confidence, of calm, of connection; it wants my students to meet their potential so that they feel good. Do the errors still exist? Of course. But, in approaching from a more grounded headspace, I can more effectively manage everything (and there’s a lot of every thing ) that’s going on in the ensemble. I believe that students can see and hear the difference, that my energy, whether conscious or unconscious to me, is completely palpable to them. When I remember to be present , I allow myself the space to hear and respond to my inner dialogue and direct my own ener - gy just as I direct the orchestra. Being pleasant means “giving a sense of happy satisfac - tion or enjoyment.” I recently read “The Art of Possibility,” a book written by Rosamund Stone Zander (family thera - pist and executive coach) and Benjamin Zander (musical director of the Boston Philharmonic Orchestra and Boston Philharmonic Youth Orchestra). This book is incredible! File under: self-help for conductors. In the second chapter,
could be the answer on some days. Orchestra continued on page 42
Voice of Washington Music Educators Association January 2023
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