NOT BORN THIS WAY BY ROSLYN ROZBRUCH (FOOD FOR THOUGHT)
“I wasn’t born neurotic; experiences in my life have made me this way.”This is a common phrase I say to people when I do something neurotic. I have a few idiosyncrasies — just ask my family and friends— but I can own them because I know they don’t come from nowhere; actual events in my life have caused me to be this way. The problem isn’t so much my quirky ways, but more about the times that I want the people I love and care about, or even strangers in some cases, to feel the way I do about the “thing” that I think is so important for them to do. For example, every time I’m in the market and I see a woman with her purse in the shopping cart instead of on her arm, I want to say, “Don’t leave your purse in the cart, someone is going to steal it.” I haven’t said that to anyone yet, because I can be shy at times, and also, I’m not sure how the person would react. I’ve never left my purse in a cart before, but my anxiety comes from being held up at knife-point years ago, and by having my house broken into. I will speak up to people I know, like when anyone wants to leave their valuables in my car, I’ll have no problem to say, “This isn’t the suburbs, don’t leave your laptop in the car. I don’t care if I am parked in the driveway.” And I will speak up in public when necessary, like the time I called the police when I saw a dog in a car alone on a 100-degree day. But was that neurotic, or did I help save the dog’s life? The point is, events happen in all our lives that lead us to believe what is true, what is right or wrong. What we do with life experiences can either propel us to our best selves, keep us paralyzed with fear, or maybe just make us a little more cautious. Yes, I’m sharing that I’m a little neurotic, but for the most part I like to take an experience, whether it’s negative or positive, and find a way to better myself or learn from it. Being aware of who you are, your personality, and what your idiosyncrasies are gives you an advantage when you want to change something in your life or make your life easier to navigate. For instance, I know it takes me an hour to get ready in the morning because I have to make the bed, empty the trash, and wash the dishes before I leave the house, so I’m aware to factor that time in my morning so I can be out the door on time. Maybe I was born a certain way, but my life experiences, good and bad, have helped me change and grow into being more of the person I want to be.
It’s a new year and a great time to look inward and get to know yourself better. Take a moment and ask yourself — what are my beliefs, and why do I think that way? Did something in particular happen in my life that led me to believe that way? Without writing out the typical New Year’s resolution list of to-do’s that fall by the wayside in a few weeks, maybe tap into who you are and ask yourself what part of you do you want to be more of? Making a conscious effort is a good first step to a better mindset and better year ahead. What we do with life experiences can either propel us to our best selves, keep us paralyzed with fear, or maybe just make us a little more cautious.
And while you’re thinking about the year ahead and all its possibilities, be sure your front door is locked. I don’t care if you live in a safe neighborhood or not. –Roslyn Rozbruch
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