“L ive as if you were to die tomorrow . L earn as if you were to live forever .” –M ahatma G andhi
A good divorce is an opportunity for remarkable growth, but how do we turn this challenging life experience into a chance to rebuild? When we started The Manely Firm, we knew our foundation would be based on the idea that family conflict and divorce are chances to grow. Many of these concepts came from “The Good Divorce” by Constance R. Ahrons. It has served as a bedrock of our practice. Here are some of the fundamental concepts of the book to help you accept that if divorce is inevitable, you still have a choice — the choice of how you will frame your approach to the process. Good Endings Remember, endings are an inherent part of life. All things that begin must also come to a close. Divorce can have an unjust, negative stigma, but you don’t have to adhere to that pessimism. Moving forward, you have control over how you reframe your life for you and your family. The end of an unhealthy relationship is just the start of a new chapter for you and your loved ones. Binuclear Families It’s a myth that divorce results in damaged children and broken homes. Divorce doesn’t end a family; it redefines a family. Ahrons refers to children of divorce as members of binuclear families, made up of two households, typically consisting of children and new spouses of their divorced parents. Children in binuclear families can lead just as healthy and adjusted lives as children from traditional family units. Frame this as a growth opportunity for the entire extended family. A Normal Event No one gets married with plans to divorce, but let’s face it, about half of all marriages end this way. Though it might not be desirable or expected, it’s normal in our society. You’re not alone, and the challenges when marriage ends are navigable. Many people find their lives improved after divorce, and you will eventually feel the same way. Forgive yourself, forgive your ex, and let go of anger. A good divorce is where adults and their children emerge emotionally well. Though your family will undergo significant and uncomfortable changes, many things will remain the same. “The Good Divorce” is widely available and continues to inform how we serve our clients. We recommend it no matter what step of the journey you are on. How to Reframe Divorce as a Path to Renewal T urn a N ew P age W ith ‘T he G ood D ivorce ’
G rilled S teak W ith C himichurri S auce
Savor the flavor with our mouthwatering grilled steak, paired perfectly with vibrant chimichurri sauce.
I ngredients
For the chimichurri sauce: • 1 cup fresh parsley, chopped • 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 2 lbs steak (flank,
• Juice of 1 lemon • 2 tbsp olive oil • 1 tsp red pepper flakes • Salt and pepper, to taste
sirloin, or skirt steak)
• 2 tbsp olive oil • Salt and pepper, to taste
D irections 1.
Preheat grill to medium-high heat.
2.
Rub the steak with the olive oil, salt, and pepper.
3. Grill the steak for 4–5 minutes per side or until it reaches desired doneness. 4. Meanwhile, make the chimichurri sauce: In a small bowl, mix together the parsley, garlic, lemon juice, olive oil, red pepper flakes, and salt and pepper. 5. Let the steak rest for 5 minutes before slicing. 6. Serve the steak with the chimichurri sauce and enjoy!
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