ner. Where the husband and wife are both stubbornly selfish there will always be difficulty. God has set down a perfect order to be fol lowed in our marital relationship. The husband is to be the head of the wife. The wife is to be subject to her husband in everything. This calls for unselfishness on the part of both. The husband has no right to be a tyrant or dictator. He is commanded to love her as Christ loved the church and gave His very life for it. You see, true love does not make demands, it makes sac rifices. Perhaps the most essential thing in this kind of love relationship is the giving of oneself to the other. That is the proof of affection that is lasting. A man may surround his wife with an array of beautiful fur niture and modern appliances; he may clothe her with all kinds of fancy and expensive apparel, but if he does not give her himself what does she really have? The same thing is true with your chil dren. Your children want you, not things. There is no substitute for you whether you be husband, wife or child! Proper communication is one of the real problems facing the average marriage. The husband ought to be sensitive to the feel ings and the thinkings of his wife. There must be a mutual sharing of ideas and goals. Obedience to Scripture on the wife's part will eliminate nagging, complaining, laziness, and a spirit of competition for control of the home. It will eliminate a tendency to criticize one's mate before oth er people. Marriage is ordained of Cod to be an illustration of the re lationship between Christ and His Church. Those who marry should Page 45
can pray for and with one another for their needs, as well as those about them. They can attend the services of a Bible-believing church together. There they will seek a place of testimony and outreach to other people for Jesus Christ. Do we eagerly anticipate these things in our Christian life? For these reasons one must not consider union with an uncon verted individual. Anything else is sure to bring heartache and misery. Amos was right in that two people cannot walk together except they be agreed (3:3). In marriage the husband has the greater responsibility to be the spir itual leader. It is sad to see how many have abdicated this divine place of direction. May we affirm with Joshua of old, "As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord" (Josh. 24:15). In many churches, because of a lack of staff, the wo men far outnumber men in teach ing positions. In homes it is often the wife who has to pray and en courage Bible study. If the husband is born again, he is neglecting his high and holy privilege. Paul has much to say about this relationship (Eph. 5:22-23). This portion should be a continual blue print for any Christian home's success. The willing subjection of the Church to Christ should be re produced in the submission of wives to their husbands. This means the husband must first give his wife the same kind of love Christ gave to us when He sacrificed Himself on the cross on our behalf. A man's love for his wife is the natural ex tension of the love he has for him self. Nobody ever hates or neglects his own body. This should be our tender care for our marriage part
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