Dr. Nirrjmore, graduate of Columbia University, New York City, is a nationally known psychologist. He is the director of one of America's
largest psychological clinics— The Christian Counseling center in Pasadena, California.
reach out and show yourself friendly to those about you, not only will you become a blessing and special help to others, but also your own spirit will be lifted too. Don’t wait for oth ers to come to you. Many people are timid about making the first step, hut they gladly welcome one who ex tends a friendly hand to them. It is false pride that makes a woman feel that she has no need for friends. Such thinking only reveals her need for companionship. We know that friendship is based on two-way com munication. Your friends are a bless ing to you, and then you become a blessing to them. 5. Consider your spiritual matu rity. God created women in His own likeness, and this means that human beings are intended to be spiritual beings. None of us can be at our best when this vital part of our na ture is neglected; yet because we have turned away from the very source of spirituality—God, our Cre ator— we are spiritually dead until we come to Him. After you have had a spiritual experience with Christ, He will transform your life as you yield yourself to His molding. Gpd doesn’t want you to be uninteresting. I would suggest that you seek out a minister, a minister’s wife, a psy chologist, a counselor, or a close friend with whom you may sit down and discuss this problem thorough ly. Such a person may be able to help you a great deal. It is better to have a good mar riage at 35 or 40 than to have a poor one at 17. I know many outstand ing women who did not marry until later in life, but when they did they had wonderful marriages. Some of their friends, however, who married in their teens or early twenties, were either divorced or miserable in their marriage. God doesn’t want all people to be married.
always helps to consider the charac ter traits which you admire in oth ers. Are they sincerity, friendli ness, vivacity, courtesy, apprecia tion, optimism, pliability, calmness, humor, confidence, reliability? 2. Consider your health. An old proverb says, “ He that hath good health is young.” No one could quarrel with such a statement. Good health is one of the most valuable resources of your life, affecting its every area. One should have fre quent physical examinations, for “ an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” 3. Check your appearance. Not all women can be beautiful; in fact, only few women are. Very few men are handsome, but all of us can be attractive. Good dress and good grooming are always in style. It pays off in real dividends of happiness. A good appearance predisposes peo ple to liking you and gives you inner confidence. 4. Consider your knowledge. When you increase your reservoir of knowl edge, it not only makes you happy, but also more interesting. A woman who is well read, for example, who learns all that is possible in a va riety of fields, is more ready to see the challenges of life. Her alert mind adds to her attraction and com mands the respect and admiration of those about her. Life would be an empty place without the joys of friendship, yet to have friends one must be one. It was Thomas Hughes who said, “ Blessed are they who have the gift of making friends; for it is one of God’s best gifts.” How true that is ! It involves many things, but above all, the power of living beyond oneself and appreciating whatever is noble and lovely. The world is filled with people who are lonely but you need not be one of them. As you
WHERE CAN I MEET MEN? Q. Where can I meet Christian young men? I am a young woman 33 years old, and I would like so much to meet and marry a Christian. I belong to a church and various fel lowship groups, but still I can’t seem to meet anyone. I have prayed many times about this with no re sults. A. This is a question which fre quently com es to my attention. There are women all over the na tion and around the world who are writing us saying, “ I am very lone ly; I would like to be married. This is a terrible life I am living.” But on the other side, I receive many let ters from women who say, “ I’m mar ried, and I would give anything if I could get unmarried; I married the wrong person, or I married in order to get out of the house where I was living.” It is often true that such a person as you who wants to get married, may afterward feel you had chosen the worse part. There is something much worse than being single, and that is being married to the wrong person. I sug gest that you seriously consider this. Here are several suggestions I would like to make: 1. Consider your resources. You have many ways of improving your self. Take a searching look at your personality. This can be either your fortune or your failure, depending on what you have made it. Some of the most radiant personalities are unmarried women. The stereotyped old maid personality is a myth and women who live alone need not be this kind of person. A single woman is independent, accustomed to doing things her own way, in her own time. Because of this she must guard against becoming brittle or bossy in her relationship with other people. It
THE KING'S BUSINESS
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