I ended up selling my home in Myrtle Beach and using the profit to come on vacation to California. A year later I moved to Northern California. I became a bartender and I eventually started drinking every day. I moved from Covelo to Lakeport, California and on days I wasn’t drinking, I drank about a fifth of vodka a day. I was always driving back and forth between Covelo and Lakeport since all my friends lived up there. I left my first husband. From the outside looking in it seem like I had everything I wanted. Nice cars, a husband, two beautiful children, and I lived in a 3/4 of a million dollar house on the lake. However, I wasn’t in love. It felt like I would truly die from a broken heart. One night after leaving the bar in Covelo, I couldn’t find any friends that were awake at three in the morning so I decided to drive one of the most treacherous mountain roads in the country back to Lakeport. I wrecked my BMW into the side of a mountain and cracked some of my ribs. A few weeks later I was closing down the bar I worked at in Lakeport and I decided to go to a small party. I ended up relapsing on what I considered hard drugs by smoking methamphetamine. Ale could think is that I was wasting my drugs because I knew how high it could be if I injected them. And that’s when it happened. It felt like someone snapped me behind my skull with a rubber band. My legs started shaking and I looked at my boyfriend at the time and told them I wanted to go lay down. He was concerned because of the amount of methamphetamine I had previously taken. I should not want to go to sleep. That night, June 30th, 2008, I had two strokes and seven brain aneurysms. I was flown from Lakeport to Stanford and then transferred to a rehabilitation center in Illinois where my mom worked. There I had did teach myself how to walk, talk, sit up, and eat again. I was like an adult trapped in a child’s body. I didn’t know what else to do so I begin praying. I begged God to help me save my own life. I thought every day that it would be a wonderful idea two pretend to take my medication and save it in my cheek so I could take it all at once. I wanted to end my own life. I was pretty sure that I would mess that up too. It seemed I messed everything in my life up. I had no hope for myself. It was depressing being around people at the end of their lives in the nursing home when I was 26-years-old and at the beginning of mine. I missed my children immensely. I had my little sister wheel me down the hall in my wheelchair. I got on the computer and bought a plane ticket back to California. The nursing home wouldn’t allow me to take my wheel chair with me. I have been walking ever since. I used a cane at first and then with physical therapy I was able to walk on my own. While my children were in school, I went to the gym. My focus was on my recovery. I began taking yoga and building strength and balance not only in my body, but also in my spirit and in my life. I became pregnant with my third child, Blake, and we learned to do so many activities
together. When I first saw my stroke I slobbered on myself for a year. I had to relearn the alphabet, how to read and count all over again. I was told to not have Blake because my body might not be a strong enough to support him. I believe my God is more powerful and knows more than any human so I prayed and I had him in January of 2010. I then decided it was time for me to try and grow my mind so maybe one day I could begin working again. I started school at Mendocino College. I didn’t know how I was going to make it work and I did not know if I were intelligent enough to take on college. I couldn’t write and I wondered how I was going to make my dreams come true. I took two classes and passed them both with scores over 100%. I added more classes and developed Mendocino College Students for Recovery Club to help students who were struggling with substance use, overeating, sex addiction, video game addiction, anxiety, etc. We were there to help anyone going through a behavioral health challenge to provide support and resources where they were lacking and fill gaps in services. A year into my Alcohol and Other Drug Services (AODS) program, I realized that to get a certificate I was going to have to get an internship. I started working at Hilltop Recovery Services as an intern in the men’s residential program and their intensive outpatient program. I decided to apply at Lake County Behavioral Health Services and became an alcohol and other drug and DUI counselor. I ended up getting three certificates and two associate’s degrees in AODS and Human Services as a Paraprofessional. I was nominated for the Jack Kent Cooke scholarship and received All-state California placement on the Academic First Team. I’d placed in the top 22 students in the state of California and received a metal and recognition at our state capitol. I went on to be awarded eight scholarships throughout my college career. My favorite professor told me she saw me as a social worker. I didn’t know what a social worker was but now that I do, I know I didn’t choose the profession, I was born one. I began studying at Humboldt State and obtained my bachelor of arts with a major in social work. I had a 4.0 GPA. I enjoyed working with those experiencing homelessness through Project Restoration and the Hope Center where we took “high utilizers” of public services off the streets and gave them a chance to obtain housing. At the end of my bachelor degree I applied at a Lake County Tribal Health Consortium as a substance use disorder and a medication assisted treatment counselor working with our local six Pomo Tribes. I have heard before that only 14% of people enjoy their job and I can honestly say that I love my job. I have the opportunity to meet people where they are at and personalize their treatment to give them their best chance at health and
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