t d k i H q t t o v & t with Dr. Clyde M. Narramore Dr. Narramore, graduate of Columbia University, Neu> York City, is a nationally known psychologist. He is the director of one of America’s largest psy chological clinics / The Christian Counseling Center in Rosemead, California. FOSTER TEENAGERS
W h a t m ak e s m in is te r s s u c c e s s fu 1?
cial reasons I had to leave college and work. That is why I have not yet completed my education. Four years ago I met a ministerial student and became deeply interested in him. He is now 25 and a college graduate. He loves me deeply and wants to be mar ried this summer. That means I would not be able to finish college. I am torn between two desires— to finish college and to marry him. I have little parental help with this decision so would appreciate any act- vice you could give me. A . Thank you very much for your letter, and I do understand your situ ation. Not having parents with whom you can talk about this makes it a real problem. First of all, you can’t blame your boy friend for wanting to get mar ried. He’s deeply in love with a lovely girl and of course he would like to be married. But I can certainly un derstand your dilemna. You would very much like to be married also. But on the other hand, you’re only 22 and have not finished college yet. You realize that all your life as a pastor’s wife you will be coming into contact with people who have a great deal of education — people with de grees and social ability. So you would like to have your college work out of the way. The decision you must make at this time is certainly a serious one and worthy of careful consideration. I think it depends a great deal upon what college graduation means to you. There are some girls who would feel that they didn’t care whether they went to school or not. But if col lege is quite important to you then you would be making a great mistake by marrying and not finishing col lege. I feel, however, that there is some leeway in this situation. Why don’t you consider going to college for one more year and then getting married ? By that time you would have only one year left. It’s quite possible that after you’re married you could finish that one year. Two years to finish after marriage sounds like too much to me for a girl who wants to be a profes sional person and whose husband is in professional work.
Q . We are the foster parents o f two nice teenagers. Neither o f them has known any other parental love and care since their mother died eleven years ago. They were very young when she died. How do we convince them o f our genuine love and con cern? How do we teach them con cern fo r others along with an appre ciation and ability to express love and concern? These two have developed normally in all other areas o f their lives. We are trying to provide a wholesome, happy homelife which will be sufficient to make up fo r the past deficit. Is there anything we can do in addition to what we are pres ently doing? A . I appreciate your letter and the interest you have expressed in these two teenagers whom you have taken into your home. There are several comments I would like to make. It seems to me first of all that you are doing the most important things. You’re giving them a home, you’re loving them, and you're telling them so. Anyone who has been taken away from a mother and father in his early years very often cannot trust people. You need to realize that this is going to be a long-term process. As you keep loving these kids, in time they will develop confidence in you, begin to respond to your love, and develop the ability to express love to others. One of the best ways to communi cate love to anyone is to spend time with him. Do things together, and encourage these young people to talk. We are all attracted to someone who will let us do the talking. This will give them the opportunity to express their feelings and clarify their think ing. We have a booklet called DAM AGED EMOTIONS which would help you in understanding their feel ings. Anyone may have a free copy by writing me at Rosemead, Califor nia 91770. COLLEGE OR MARRIAGE? Q . I am 22 years old and have fin ished two years o f college. For finan
Several qualitiescon tributetothesucesof a minister. The first is DEEP SPIRITUALITY. Another prime requi site for the sucessful minister is UNDER STANDING PEOPLEAND THEIR PROBLEMS.- To provide this di mension, theNaramore
Christian Foundation has developeda unique, highly specialized INTENSIVE TRAINING IN COUNSELING for ministers,misionaries, and their wives.The purpose ofthis training isto helpeach minister counsel moreeffectively. 35 hours ofeach week during the ap roxi mately four-week period are devotedto in struction by the largestaff of dedicated Christian psychologists, profesional counse lorsand medicalpersonnel. Included are:
• PERSONALITY DISTURBANCES • ALCOHOLISM • DEFENSE MECHANISMS • CHARACTER DISORDERS • SEX DEVIATION • DRUG ADDICTION • THE BIBLE IN COUNSELING • PRE-MARRIAGE COUNSELING • PROFESSIONAL TECHNIQUES
More than20 from 30 states and 20 foreign countries have taken this training. Openings areavailable for both April and June 1969. Phone: (213) 288-7000
■■ ............. SEND TODAY ...... ■•■•■■■ai NAME ............................................ ...... ADDRESS ___________________ ...... ________ _____ ____ZIP_________ NARRAMORE CHRISTIAN FOUNDATION ROSEMEAD, CALIFORNIA 91770 K-100
MARCH, 1969
29
Made with FlippingBook Online document