FranklinCovey-The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Sales Leaders

HABIT 5: SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD

are great questions and if clients answered them it would make a sales job much easier. Then I ask, “How would knowing all that information affect what you do?” Invariably, participants say: “We wouldn’t have to guess about so much. We could be more specific as we build and hone our solution.” Then I ask, “So what would have to happen before a client would willingly share all of that information?” Hopefully, at least one participant will say, “They’d have to trust you, and they’d have to see benefit in sharing that information.” The benefit to the client in sharing information is that for every solution, there’s a way to make it unique. Think about when doctors are diagnosing patients: They have a host of solutions to choose from— wait it out and take it easy, physical therapy, medications, and surgery. If they’re good, they listen to their patients’ needs, because it may make a difference in what they prescribe. And even if it doesn’t change the prescribed solution, importantly, listening to a patient increases the patient’s belief that the recommended solution will work. In the same way, we want to understand our clients’ uniqueness so we can bring them solutions that exactly meet their needs.

So after you’ve really sought to understand and it’s time to be understood, don’t be bashful. Be strong, bold, and passionate— because now you understand the need. When relevance and “fit” are clear, then passion is more helpful. It boosts believability and confidence. But if you passionately try to get clients to do something they don’t perceive is relevant and that doesn’t directly fit their need, they question what you say, resist your recommendations, and even question your motives. REFLECT UNIQUENESS TO INCREASE CREDIBILITY Clients assign you more credibility when they believe you understand their uniqueness and then demonstrate that understanding by how you tailor your advocacy. In meetings with clients, in job interviews, even in internal meetings where you think you’re supposed to tell, it actually increases your relevance and influence by finding out more about the other person’s unique situation, experience, needs, or wants. The natural sequence for successful meetings/ presentations is: 1. Understand uniqueness 2. Demonstrate your understanding by showing how your solution fits their uniqueness 3. Advocate passionately Dr. Stephen R. Covey conveys the power of this sequence by putting it in the context of three early Greek terms: ethos, pathos, and logos. “Ethos is your personal credibility, the faith people have in your integrity and competency…

Pathos is the empathic side… It means that you are in alignment with the emotional thrust of another person’s communication…Logos is the logic, the reasoning part of the presentation.” In presentations and meetings, most people go straight to the left-brain logic and try to convince others of the value or validity of their logic. World-class advocacy must be preceded by world- class enquiry.

me is that to have influence with others, you must first be influenced by others. The power in this is based on what scientists call reciprocity and it’s a strong motivator in our interactions. If someone is nice to you, you feel you should be nice to them. On the other hand, if someone is mean to you it’s easy to justify being mean right back. When it comes to clients, if you invest your time and attention to listening first, it encourages reciprocity because it gives them what Stephen calls ‘psychological air’. And it’s a huge deposit in their emotional bank account. Once they’ve aired their concerns and priorities, then they, in turn, are freed up to fully and completely listen to you. Because you’ve invested first, they are more willing to be open to what you have to say. While it may seem counterintuitive—and in many cases it can be hard to do—it’s not counterproductive. Influence is the key to more powerful advocacy!

The Habit ‘Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood’ is where it

becomes evident you can’t sever your private life from your public life—who you are, how confident and comfortable

you are with yourself, and the character ethic you’ve

developed. This core gives life to the technique of listening. It is the strength of your character that allows you to comfortably, temporarily set aside your own beliefs and demands for attention in order to deeply listen to another. Listening is a choice, plain and simple. BE INFLUENTIAL, NOT IMPRESSIVE Why do we associate credibility with ‘impressing’ people? It happens all the time, and not only in the sales world. The brand of car you drive, the label on the suit you’re wearing, the title you hold in a company, where you live, the trip you just took, or the names you can drop: It’s common to focus on these in an effort to impress others. But the truth is, what you actually need is to have influence with others, especially when it comes to sharing your ideas and having others embrace them. One of the powerful principles Stephen R. Covey taught

“Both halves are required, and both are equally important”

NOW SEEK TO BE UNDERSTOOD Both halves—inquiry and

advocacy— create the whole. The second half of Habit 5, “Then to Be Understood,” is no less important than the first half. Clients do expect to hear about your company and how you can help—and they do want to know why they should pay attention to you and not someone else.

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