King's Business - 1958-04

Dr. Clyde M. Narramore, iduate of Columbia Uni­ versity, New York City, is chologist and Consultant in Research and Guidance ith one of the largest school systems in America.

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Your Answers Recently we printed the following letter from a woman seeking advice from other readers of T h e K i n g ’ s B u s i n e s s : 1 have one daughter who is 17. She is going steady with a very fine Catholic lad of 21. I have talked to her about the unhappiness of a mixed- association and eventually marriage. M y heart is very heavy as she has asked me to sign for her to get married and for her to become a Catholic. 1 feel if I sign for her I’m not only signing away my fu­ ture grandchildren but my only child. W e need your prayers and advice. M any readers wrote offering a word o f advice and promising to pray for this situation. W e have se­ lected a few of the representative replies. From a business man As a father that with God’s help has reared two fine Christian chil­ dren, I offer this advice: never yield to your children in matters where God’s W ord clearly indicates what your stand is to be. Do not sign for her to marry this man regardless of what she does because o f your re­ fusal. Our heavenly Father will bless you for your faithfulness if it is done for His honor and glory. From a former Catholic I’m not one to write in answers or suggestions to other people, hut I feel I must to this woman. I would say do not sign for her to marry. In the first place the girl is too young, a few months or even weeks might be just the time needed to change her m ind or find someone else. Our daughter is 17 now, but at

15 she wanted to marry an older boy, shortly after we first allowed her to date. I talked to the boy’s mother and the boy and stopped it, as they were going to elope to an­ other state. Today she has a very nice boy friend nearer her age who is going to college, and she is more ready to make decisions and isn’t nearly so anxious to jump into mar­ riage. One of our sons married a Cath­ olic girl. I had a talk with him after his first date with her, but he laughed at the idea it might lead to marriage. I begged him not to take her out again, as we are funda­ mental Protestants. He finally mar­ ried her and promised to raise the children as Catholics. Th ey have three children. I love m y daughter- in-law, she is lovely and a good w ife and mother but m y son never speaks of religion or enters a church door. It hurts to see m y grandchildren praying to all those saints and wear­ ing medals, etc. I lived for a long time in a convent and was con­ firmed a Catholic as a child. From Oregon If the mother c o n s e n t e d she would be committing a grave sin. I married a Roman Catholic with the intention of joining his church, but the Lord intervened and showed me that the Roman Catholic Church has added to and taken away much of the W ord o f God, against which there are solemn warnings in the Scriptures. A fter 20 years o f marriage, we are still poles apart on religion, which has caused me no end of grief, plus many awkward situa­ tions and embarrassment to the chil­ dren. It would take too much space to list the heartaches, and even trag­ edy I have experienced because o f being “ unequally yoked.” God has

a plan for us and that plan includes the life partner. If she marries this Roman Catholic, she would ignore God’s plan and I can, from bitter experience, predict that she will be in for real trouble. She m ay think it w ill break her heart now, but a heart broken in doing right will soon be healed b y the mercy of a loving heavenly Father. If she goes headlong against the direct com­ mand of God in this matter her heart w ill be broken a thousand times. From Maryland I know from m y own recent per­ sonal experience just what this mother is passing through. M y son was to marry a Catholic girl. He had a talk with the parents and priest and was led to believe he could marry her even though he re­ mained true to his Protestant belief. But the priest finally persuaded the girl to break the engagement as he felt sure that m y Christian son would never change his faith and that would lead to an unhappy mar­ riage. I was extremely worried as I live in a different city and didn’t know the girl and both were old enough to do what they wanted. So I just put the burden on the great Burden Bearer— our Lord and Saviour. And that is how m y prayers were an­ swered— by the priest himself for- biding the marriage. From Kansas As a minister I would advise: 1) refuse to sign and explain that it would be disobedient to God; 2) pray as you have never prayed be­ fore; 3) talk to your pastor and get him (along with other consecrated Christian friends who w ill keep things in confidence) to pray dili­ gently with you.

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