■ Try a new type of exercise ■ Unplug from your phone ■ Read a book (or an audiobook) ■ Start a Journal
BE INTENTIONAL WITH FRIENDS As a parent of kids with busy schedules that often overflowed with social events and extracurriculars, maybe most of your friends are the parents of your kids’ friends. Or, perhaps you had close friends once upon a time… but between work, moves, and life, you grew apart. No matter your “relationship status” with your friends, it’s never too late to be intentional. Plan a weekend college reunion, go see a high school friend, or get together for lunch with those basketball mamas (or dads). You’re allowed to stay friends even though your kids aren’t in town anymore… it might even be helpful, because they understand exactly what you’re feeling! This is also your chance to make new friends. Be brave. Invite your neighbors over, join a bible study at church, make conversation with people you see in your workout class or art studio. Will it sometimes be awkward or uncomfortable? Certainly. But remember, if your baby can be brave enough to move out and meet new people in college, you can do it too! CREATE A BUCKET LIST Setting both long- and short-term goals is not only a “fun idea,” it’s essential. Spend time writing down things you aspire to accomplish, places you hope to go, and things you want to do, then swap with your spouse. Compare lists, and then come up with a shared couples bucket list. Dream big! It can be as outlandish as you want. Once the list is made, don’t leave the notepad to collect dust in the junk drawer; hang it on the fridge and start making plans for how you’re going to cross things off! Congratulations, you’ve made it through the chaos of the baby phase, the elementary school stage, the middle school years (oof, those were some rough times), and the high school saga! Now your youngest baby has flown the coop. Don’t worry, you’ll still have plenty to worry about and drama to hear, but now you’ve got to trust that you’ve raised your child to be the best person they can be, and then you need to focus on soaking in the gift of empty nesting. Remember: An empty nest does not mean an empty life. Can’t wait to see all the new home improvements, hobbies, and fabulous travel destinations in your future on Facebook!
Preparing for Empty Nesting
BY JULIANNA STEEN
Y ou’ve done your part: You’ve wiped the dirty diapers, listened to the middle school drama, held your baby’s hair as they threw up yet again from the stomach bug. You’ve poured your blood, sweat, tears, and oh so much money into your little baby, cheering them on at all their extracurriculars and helping them to grow into a person you’re proud to post about on Facebook. But now that fateful, wonderful, feared day has come and gone: High school graduation. As you assist in packing your kid for college, you may begin to wonder what life after kids in the house is like. Yes, college is exciting for them, but leaving you in that quiet, empty house doesn’t sound so exciting for you. But empty nesting shouldn’t be something to dread! You should enter this new season with excitement and anticipation. Here are some practical tips for how to prepare for empty nesting and ways to enjoy the new freedoms found in this season. FIND A PURPOSE Let’s not sugarcoat it: No matter how independent your child was before leaving for college, you did a lot for them, which means you’re about to have a whole lot more time on your hands. Nature Medicine’s 2023 study, spanning over 93,000 people ages 65 and older across 16 countries, suggests that there are physical and emotional benefits to having a hobby. Those with hobbies showed fewer symptoms of depression and a higher life satisfaction than those without. And if by “hobby” you hear, “find a new project,” like fixing up the back patio like you’ve always wanted but never made the time for... I won’t dissuade you.
PLAN A VACATION This might be our favorite suggestion, because who doesn’t love a good vacay?! Now that you’re not tied down to a school schedule (for the first time in, ahem, 12-plus years), you are free to travel anytime in the fall or spring. It doesn’t have to be fancy or two weeks long—though, it can be… Europe, anyone?—even a long weekend at the beach will do the trick. The key is to give you something to look forward to that gets you out of the house and puts you in your happy place, helping you dislodge yourself from the emotional rut you might occasionally find yourself in. Plus, this is a great opportunity to rekindle your relationship with your spouse and remind yourselves why you married in the first place, before kids came into the picture. MAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF When was the last time you really, truly devoted time and energy to your physical, emotional, and mental health? Amid the hustle and bustle of kids, you always come in last… but now that you’ve sent off the last one, you finally have time for you. And I’m not talking about “you and your spouse” time… though there’s a time for that too. You need to make sure each of you has your own alone time, your own “stuff,” because in many cases this is the most time you’ve ever been together, and that can be tough. But “me time” won’t come naturally—remember, you’ve been trained to not think about you, even when there’s throw-up on your shirt or you’re running on four hours of sleep because someone decided to stay out past curfew. There are a few different ways you can reconnect with and invest in yourself.
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