Take a look at our July newsletter!
REALESTATEPLANNINGLAW.COM 718-698-2200 July 2025
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IN A MANOR OF SPEAKING
How to Make the Conversation About the Future a Little Easier The Talk That Brings Families Closer
I’ve sat across the table from countless families, and I’ve learned that the hardest part of planning for the future isn’t the legal work. It’s the conversation that comes before it. How do you talk to your aging parents about their wishes without making them feel like they’re giving up control? How do you bring up things like Wills, Powers of Attorney, or long- term care with your spouse without sounding alarmist? And what about your kids? How do you tell them about your own plans without making it sound like a farewell speech? I’ve heard it all: “It just feels awkward.” “I don’t want to upset anyone.” “We’ll figure it out when the time comes.” But here’s what I’ve also seen: Families who never have these conversations are left guessing at the worst possible time. And that guessing? It turns into stress, disagreements, and sometimes lasting family fractures. That’s why I believe one of the greatest acts of love is talking about the hard things before they become urgent. No, you don’t need to launch into a full estate planning discussion at the dinner table. You can start gently. Thoughtfully. Maybe it begins with something simple, like a quiet moment in the car or a walk around the block. You might say, “I’ve been thinking lately about what matters most to me, and I want to ensure we’re all on the same page for the future.”
It’s not about having all the answers. It’s about creating a space where people feel safe talking about what they want, what they fear, and what they hope for. With aging parents, I often suggest leaning into love and support: “I want to make sure I understand what’s most important to you so I can help carry that out when the time comes.” That kind of language softens the conversation. It’s not about taking control, it’s about honoring their choices. With a spouse or partner, it might be as simple as, “Have we talked enough about what we’d want for the kids, the house, everything we’ve built?” These questions aren’t cold, they’re comforting. They show that you care enough to plan with them, not for them. And with children, especially grown ones, don’t underestimate how much peace of mind it gives them to know your affairs are in order. It’s not morbid, it’s responsible. It’s reassuring. You might be surprised how relieved they are to hear you’ve thought things through. Share a story of a friend or neighbor who didn’t have a plan, and how tough it was for their family. Or, on a more positive note, talk about someone who did have a plan, and how much smoother it made everything. Real-life
examples can help make the conversation relatable, not abstract.
Once you’ve had the initial talk, write down your wishes and speak with an attorney to create a plan and have your wishes finalized. But don’t let that be the end of it. Revisit the topic now and then. Life changes, and so do our needs and goals. So, if the thought of starting the conversation has held you back, shift your perspective. Don’t focus on what could go wrong. Focus on what can go right: greater peace of mind, fewer future conflicts, and a shared sense of confidence moving forward. The most powerful conversations we’ll ever have are the ones that leave people feeling seen, supported, and safe. In my experience, that’s the foundation of every strong plan and every strong family.
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PAW-SOME ADVENTURES
Thanks to peel-and-stick wallpaper, adding a splash of personality to your walls has never been easier. But while the promise of a mess-free application sounds perfect, missteps can quickly turn your DIY into a “Why-Did-I-Try?” moment. Whether accenting one wall or transforming an entire room, these expert tips will help you decorate with professional skill without the stress. Measure With Care Before impulse buying, carefully measure your wall space and determine how many panels you’ll need. Be sure to order slightly more than you think you’ll use — running out of material mid-project is one of the most common (and frustrating) DIY missteps. Prep Your Wall Start with a clean surface. Use a damp cloth to remove dust, dirt, or oils from the wall and allow it to dry completely. A clean surface helps the wallpaper adhere properly and prevents premature lifting. Gather the Right Tools Gather your gear: a measuring tape, a level, a smoothing tool, a utility knife with a fresh blade, a pencil, and a step ladder. These trusty
tools will help you line things up, cut like a pro, and avoid mid-project meltdowns. Create a Guide Line Measure the width of your wallpaper panel and mark it on the wall with a pencil. Use a level to draw a vertical line from the ceiling to the baseboard. This guide will keep your first panel perfectly straight, critical for seamlessly applying the rest of your wallpaper! Match Patterns Carefully For a cohesive look, match the pattern of each new panel with the one before it. Slightly overlap the edges and use the smoothing tool to eliminate bubbles and create a seamless appearance. Ask for Help Although peel-and-stick wallpaper is designed for DIY use, having an extra set of hands can make a major difference. A second person can hold the panel in place while you smooth and trim, ensuring a faster and more accurate application. With the right tools and patience, peel-and-stick wallpaper can be a simple way to transform your space. Take your time, follow these steps, and admire the fresh new look you’ve created!
YOUR NO-STRESS GUIDE TO PEEL-AND- STICK WALLPAPER Stick With It!
Your Staycation, Your Rules Easily Enjoy a Perfect Home Holiday
Sometimes, the best escape is right under your nose. Planning a staycation in your local area can save you the hassle of long travel days and large expenses but also reveals hidden gems in your own backyard. Here are six ways you can turn your town into a fun staycation! Set your intentions. Start by deciding what kind of staycation vibes you’re aiming for. Is it relaxation with spa-like peace and quiet, or are you looking for adventure and exploration? Setting your intentions will help guide your activities and tailor your staycation to your desires. Treat yourself. Part of the joy of vacationing comes from stepping out of your routine and indulging a bit. Why should a staycation be any different? Book a massage at a local spa, order takeout
from that high-end restaurant you’ve always wanted to try or splurge on a fancy “hotel-style” breakfast in bed. Remember, it’s all about treating yourself! Visit a new place each day. Challenge yourself to visit new spots in your area. It could be a park you’ve never strolled through, a museum you’ve skipped, or an interesting shop you’ve passed but never entered. It’s fun to see how much you discover in places you can visit every day. Don’t judge yourself for not doing anything. If your most adventurous activity for a day is moving from your bed to your couch or hammock, that’s perfectly fine. Not every staycation day needs to be filled with activities. After all, the best memories can
come from hanging out and enjoying the peace of your own space. Be a tourist for the day. Grab a camera and see your city through the eyes of a tourist. You might discover typical tourist activities you’ve never done because you live there. It’s a fun way to engage with your surroundings differently. Remember, it’s your staycation. The best part of a staycation is that there are no rules. Sleep in, stay up late, eat dessert for breakfast, or wear pajamas all day. Do what makes you happy because, after all, isn’t that what any great vacation is about?
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A Promise That Lives On WHY A MARITAL TRUST MAY BE THE MISSING PIECE IN YOUR ESTATE PLAN
There’s no one-size-fits-all solution for estate planning, but if you’re married, there’s a strong chance a marital trust could be one of the most powerful options available. Unlike other types of trusts, which can be crafted to benefit children, charities, or even pets, marital trusts are designed with one key goal: protecting and providing for your spouse after you’re gone. A Safety Net for the One You Love Marital trusts serve a distinct purpose, ensuring your spouse is financially secure for the rest of their life. These trusts generate income from assets placed in the trust and provide ongoing support to your surviving partner. But it doesn’t stop there. Once your spouse passes, the remaining assets (the principal) are distributed to your chosen beneficiaries, often children or other loved ones. This makes marital trusts an excellent option for blended families who want to balance care for a spouse with protection of a legacy for kids from previous relationships. Peace of Mind With a Protective Edge These trusts also offer something every family deserves: stability. By sheltering assets from creditors and helping manage estate taxes, a
marital trust can reduce stress during life’s most difficult transitions. It allows your loved ones to grieve without being overwhelmed by financial uncertainty. Whether it’s an AB Trust that divides assets strategically or a QTIP Trust that ensures long-term care for your spouse, the right trust can provide a thoughtful path forward. Things to Consider Before You Commit Still, creating a marital trust is a decision that requires care. Many are irrevocable , meaning they can’t be changed once they’re established. And for those with substantial estates, a single trust may not be enough to handle every tax consideration. Setting up the trust can also take time, especially if you’re transferring complex assets. But with the right guidance, the process becomes a meaningful step in building your family’s future. At Merlino & Gonzalez, we understand that estate planning is deeply personal. Our attorneys are here to help you create a plan that reflects your values, honors your relationships, and protects your loved ones. Let’s build something lasting together. Contact us today to begin the conversation.
Get into the Independence Day spirit with this refreshing, layered cocktail — citrusy and perfect for hot summer days. 4TH OF JULY COCKTAIL Michele’s Recipe Corner
INGREDIENTS •
2 oz grenadine, divided
• • •
6 oz lemonade
3 oz vodka
2 oz blue curaçao
DIRECTIONS 1. In each of 2 cocktail glasses, pour 1 oz grenadine and fill with ice. 2. In a cocktail shaker or glass measuring cup, mix lemonade and vodka. 3. Slowly pour the mixture evenly into the glasses with grenadine. 4. Place a soup spoon upside down over each glass. Very slowly, pour half of the blue curaçao over the spoon, cascading the curaçao to create the blue layer. 5. Serve immediately, and let freedom ring!
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718-698-2200 | realestateplanninglaw.com WE KEEP YOU ON THE RIGHT PATH
INSIDE THIS ISSUE
How to Start the Family Conversation Everyone Avoids Page 1
Secrets to a Wallpaper Transformation
Creating a Vacation Vibe at Home Page 2
Guard Your Spouse’s Future With Grace and Intention
4th of July Cocktail Page 3
Beat the Heat With Beats, Eats, and Hot Air Balloon Feats Page 4
Music, Pizza, and Balloons Light Up New Jersey & Staten Island July Is Jumpin’!
Warren County Farmers’ Fair & Hot Air Balloon Festival July 26–Aug. 2 WarrenCountyFarmersFair.org Celebrate 200 years of Warren County and 25 years of high-flying fun at the Warren County Farmers’ Fair & Hot Air Balloon Festival! Soar into summer
Summer is in full swing, and July is serving up the perfect excuse to soak in the sunshine and explore some of the most exciting events in New Jersey and Staten Island. From music festivals that turn city parks into dance floors to craft beer and pizza celebrations that redefine picnic season, there’s no shortage of fun waiting just around the corner.
the best of Jersey’s artists and artisans. Bring a blanket, grab your crew, and come vibe with the heart of Jersey City. Kills Boro’s 5th Annual Pizza Party July 26, from 12–4 p.m. Snug-Harbor.org/upcoming-events-calendar Pizza lovers, mark your calendars for the tastiest Saturday of the year! On July 26, the South Meadow at Snug Harbor transforms into a pizza lover’s paradise and a craft beer haven. Chow down on slices from Staten Island’s pizza all-stars and sip unlimited beer samples from Kills Boro and other beloved local breweries. It’s all happening picnic-style, with blankets, lawn chairs, and unbeatable energy all to support Snug Harbor Cultural Center & Botanical Garden. Be sure to buy your tickets ASAP!
Loud Garden Music Festival Saturday, July 19, from 2–8 p.m.
with daily balloon launches, thrilling demolition derbies, horse shows, tractor pulls, carnival rides, and free family entertainment all week long. Enjoy tethered or full hot air balloon rides, groove to local bands, and even sip from the beer garden or catch
Get ready, Jersey City, because Lincoln Park is turning up the volume! On Saturday, July 19, you can experience the debut of the Loud Garden Music Festival, a free celebration of music, flavor, and local creativity. Expect a jam-packed lineup of artists with global flair and deep Jersey roots, DJs spinning every genre under the sun, flavor-packed food trucks, and a Creator Collective spotlighting
a sunset launch. It’s affordable down-to-earth fun with sky-high charm for all ages!
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