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Bolton Bulletin The December 2022
Tomball 990 Village Square, Suite G1100 Tomball, TX 77375 (281) 351-7897
The Woodlands 2441 High Timbers Dr., Suite 400 The Woodlands, TX 77380 BoltonLaw.com
A Holiday Message The Value in a Single Day
Sometimes my office and social commitments make my schedule completely insane. My calendar looks like a game of Tetris. But one of the immovable blocks on my calendar is at least three family dinners with Justin during the work week. Then each weekend, I plan an activity for us to do together, whether it is watching a video or going to the Renaissance Festival. I want to know that some time will be spent during that weekend building memories, and a stronger relationship between the two of us. Justin tells me that he is essentially an adult, and he doesn’t need me to make time for him, so I tell him that I need him to make that time for me. Last month, Justin suggested we go to a “smash house” together. For those who aren’t familiar, a smash house is an attraction where you pay money to go in and essentially break a bunch of stuff. It felt surprisingly fun, but what’s more important is that I got to spend quality time with my son — time that I can never get back. I’m so grateful we added another memory to the precious moments I’ve stored away in my heart. When I look back on my life, I want to feel proud of how I spent my time. This drives my calendar requirements and how I balance my professional and personal life. I want to ensure that on each day, week, and month, I’ve spent memorable time with my children, siblings, father, established friendships, and developing new friendships and relationships, in addition to growing my practice. Life is too short. The time we carve out to spend with our loved ones will be the times that we remember. As we approach the holidays, make the most of the laughs over the dinner table, the bonding moments, time with family and friends over the holidays, and the unconditional love of your family. Our time here is precious, and each day is golden.
Several years ago, as a service project for my church, I indexed hundreds of old, handwritten death certificates by entering the information into a searchable computer database so that people could research their ancestors. As I filled in the records, the finite nature of life made a deep impression on me. Whether I was entering that a girl lived 7 years and 64 days, or that another man lived 88 years and 291 days — both of their lives ended, and each day they lived was recorded on that small piece of paper. Was that man glad he lived 88 years and 291 days instead of 88 years and 290 days? Even if he had lost his faculties, what about that last good day? Hadn’t that seemed golden and precious to him? Wasn’t each one of those numbered days just as golden, and just as irreplaceable? Life is sweet to most of us. Even if we don’t have everything we want, we don’t want to let go when the end comes. Since then, at different times throughout the years, I occasionally stop and remind myself that my days, too, will one day be numbered on a government database, and in the annals of heaven. Today, the day that I’m writing this, the day you are reading it, is one of those precious, golden days. What am I doing with this day to make myself glad at the end of my life that I had this day? As a result, I make monumental efforts to ensure I spend regular quality time with the people who matter most to me. Right now, my children are at the top of that list. I have one 17-year-old son, Justin, at home with me since everyone else has left the nest.
From my family to you and yours, happy holidays!
-Ruby Bolton
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Melanie Shaha is currently fighting her third brain cancer battle. For 15 years, she’s been suffering from a benign tumor on her pituitary gland. Although she doesn’t mind being sick, going to her appointments, focusing on her treatment, and talking to loved ones about her cancer, she doesn’t like looking sick. If you didn’t know Shaha, you wouldn’t realize she was battling cancer. But this suddenly changed once she lost all of her hair. She had two surgeries, in 2003 and 2006, in hopes of removing the tumor on her pituitary gland, but they weren’t successful. Then, when she began radiation therapy in 2017, the treatment caused her hair to fall out. “Not having hair [makes] you stick out like a sore thumb, and well- meaning people can say things that break your heart,” Shaha told TODAY. She didn’t like all the attention and the looks people gave her in public. So, her 27-year-old son Matt had an idea. At first, Matt joked about cutting all of his hair off to make his mother a wig. But the joke soon became a plan, and Matt followed through in 2018. Locks of Love Son Makes a Wig for His Mother
him from cutting it, but Matt wanted to help her feel confident and comfortable in her skin. So, he chopped it off and sent his locks to Compassionate Creations, a hair company in Newport Beach, California, that created a wig for his mother. Now, Shaha has a piece of her son to take everywhere with her beautiful new tresses. “The color is spectacular, and we had it cut and styled with a hairdresser. Matt said it looked great on me. It sure fills your emotional cup,” Shaha says. If you — or someone you know — would like to donate your hair to cancer patients, you can donate to Locks of Love, Wigs For Kids, Chai Lifeline, and Children With Hair Loss. Research donation centers in your area if you would like to give back locally. Holiday Shopping Scams Businesses boom during the holiday season because more people buy their products and services. But this means potential scams can also increase, but you can do a few things to ensure your personal information and banking details are safe. You may see products online or advertisements on Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok that pique your interest. But before you click “buy,” ensure the website is legitimate. Search for the product on a search engine to see if the same links appear. Carefully read reviews, look for website security credentials, and research unknown retailers before purchasing. It’s better to take extra precautions to ensure your information isn’t compromised. In addition, never use public Wi-Fi when purchasing items online. You’re more likely to be hacked when the Wi-Fi connection isn’t protected or in a secure network. Hackers tap into public internet sources and intercept your data through techniques like eavesdropping. Although it’s appealing to use public Wi-Fi because you think it’s free, it’s not. You pay with your personal information and data. If you or someone you know is a victim of fraud, report the scam to the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) online or by phone at 1-877-382-4357. For more information on scams, fraud, and identity theft, go to USA.gov/scams-and-frauds to learn how to protect yourself better.
After graduating from college, Matt began growing his hair out. In no time, he had long and luscious hair. His mother tried to dissuade
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emails like these are all too common; unfortunately, millions of people’s data is compromised as a result. Understandably, when you first receive these scam emails, you panic because you think they are legitimate. But remember, USPS, UPS, Amazon, and FedEx won’t ask for personal information over email. A good rule of thumb is never to click on links in emails — even from the actual company. Scammers are very good at making their emails look authentic. Instead, go to the delivery company’s website and log in to your account. If action is required, you should see a notification in your portal. Alternatively, you can call the business’s customer service line to check if their email is authentic.
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TAKE A BREAK
We’ve all felt anxious, guilty, fearful, and sad — it’s a part of life. Perhaps you’ve tried to avoid or suppress these emotions, but you’re not a rock. As humans, we experience these feelings all the time. Trying to control them may only make matters worse. So, instead, focus on something you can control — your actions. That’s the central premise of Mark Freeman’s mental health book “You Are Not a Rock.” He aims to teach readers how to build emotional fitness and overcome their struggles and hardships with different techniques. The book is divided into two sections titled “The Basics” and “The Transformation.” The first half is about learning basic mental health skills and unlearning ways of thinking about mental health that cause us challenges. The second half focuses on how to create and build what you want to see in your life instead of trying to avoid and control what you can’t see. As you read, you’ll learn how to recognize your problems, practice mindfulness, prioritize and follow your values, and understand your fears. The strategies in “You Are Not a Rock” are the same tactics Freeman used in his personal life, and he shares some of those stories in the book. There are exercises at the end of each chapter that Freeman highly encourages you to complete. By TIRED OF FEELING ANXIOUS AND FEARFUL? Read ‘You Are Not a Rock’ by Mark Freeman
WINTER VEGETABLE SHEPHERD’S PIE
Inspired by BBCGoodFood.com
performing these exercises, you can
Ingredients
better understand the book’s contents and implement Freeman’s tactics in your life. Before Freeman helps readers begin their journey, he states that strengthening your mental health is like working on your physical health — you won’t see instant results. “Changing your brain takes time
• 4 garlic cloves, sliced • 1 sprig rosemary • 15-oz can diced tomatoes plus liquid • 1/2 cup water • 1 1/2 cups frozen peas • Milk, to desired consistency
• 6 1/2 cups potatoes, cut into large chunks • 2 tbsp olive oil • 2 onions, sliced • 1 tbsp flour • 2 large carrots, cut into rounds • 1/2 cauliflower, broken into florets
Directions
1. In a pot, boil potatoes until tender. 2. In a pan, heat oil over medium heat. Add onion and cook until softened. Stir in flour and cook for 2 minutes. Add carrots, cauliflower, garlic, and rosemary and stir until softened. 3. Pour tomatoes into mix and add water. Cover and let simmer for 10 minutes, then remove lid and cook for 15 minutes until thickened. Stir in peas and simmer. 4. Drain and mash potatoes. Stir in milk to desired consistency. 5. Preheat oven to 375 F. Spoon hot vegetable mix into pie dish, then top with mashed potatoes. Bake until top is golden brown.
and effort … I’m not going to share with you any magical supplements or special mantras. This is simply a book about actions,” Freeman says in his introduction. If you’re interested in reading “You Are Not a Rock,” you can purchase your copy wherever books are sold online or in bookstores.
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(281) 351-7897 BoltonLaw.com 2441 High Timbers Dr., Suite 400 The Woodlands, TX 77380
INSIDE THIS ISSUE
1
Happy Holidays!
What Started as a Joke Became Reality
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Winter Vegetable Shepherd’s Pie Tired of Feeling Anxious and Fearful?
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Protect Your Personal Data From Scammers
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We get busy shopping for Christmas gifts online and in-store during the holiday season. It’s the season that keeps on giving — but not for all. Scammers will devise clever ways to con you out of your hard-earned money. Some will take advantage of your generosity. So, as you scroll through shopping websites and wait for your gifts to come in the mail, be sure to protect yourself from scammers. Here are some tips. Holiday Mail Scams Shipping companies will give you updates and status on your items when you order something online or ship a package off. Although this tool is excellent for tracking where your orders are, scammers will send phishing emails pretending to be these shipping companies. These emails claim your package is lost or more information is needed to process your order or shipment. Some may have a webpage link for you to submit personal information. Phishing How to Avoid Holiday Scams ’Tis the Season for Giving — Not Stealing
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