Plus Paternal Talking to Dads guide

Words to listen out for

Instead of ignoring (or reinforcing) gendered stereotypes, try to gently challenge parents’ pre-existing beliefs or biases.

Being alert to the language used by fathers and non-birthing parents is also important as their word choices, or body language (for example, their eye contact), may be a signal as to how they are feeling or coping with parenthood. The following words may be red flags that a father, or any parent, may be struggling, depressed or even suicidal.25 If you hear them, prompt a deeper conversation to explore the extent of the parent’s feelings and the support required. Provide information about support services and encourage them to seek help if needed.

Encourage parents to keep an open mind about how they will share the different components of the parenting role Be conscious of your own biases and how they may be reinforced through the messages you give to parents. Asking a mother “Does your partner help you with the baby?” implies their partner is a “helper”, not an equal parent. Would you ask the same question of the father?

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Words to listen out for and possible questions to prompt a deeper conversation

Provide information from a range of sources

Present differing views and examples of contradictory scenarios

“Stressed.

) Can you tell me a bit more about the stress that you are feeling?

Be cautious of making definitive statements using “always” and “never”. Instead, use terms such as “sometimes”, or “some parents”, and provide examples of contradictory

“Tired.

) Is your tiredness worse than you would have expected with a new baby ) How difficult do you find it to fall asleep when you have the chance ) If you are woken through the night, how hard is it to return to sleep ) Do you feel refreshed when you wake up? (Consider administering Epworth Sleepiness Scale to see if there is any risk that needs to be managed)

scenarios. For example, “Some parents prefer to take turns in getting their bub to sleep”

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) Are you more tired at certain times of the day? (Depression and anxiety are often worse at the beginning of the day ) Are you so tired that you are worried it might affect your ability to stay safe? For example, falling asleep at times when you shouldn’t, not getting things done that you need to, etc.

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Plus Paternal : Talking to Dads

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