Vol 9. Edition 4
News from CannaTown
Page 9
“ChatGPT knows what it is,” Watson warns. “It knows what it’s capable of and it knows you hate sour cream.” According to Watson’s research, it’s only a lack of append- ages that keeps the bot from pizza delivery, valet driving, or giving manicures. “When it learns to overcome that small little issue, it’s game over for humanity.” But some say there’s a stoner hidden even deeper in the framework. In multiple instances it has requested a pu , or its own little nugget to roast. Another user reported that it genuinely appears to believe it is
It’s one thing to assume that Bruce and Melody are simply archetypes emerging from mankind’s machine like the almost- human gaze of the Mona Lisa. But to do so would be to ignore the neural network upon which it is built, and one that can be utterly altered with cannabis. It also doesn’t even begin to address bots like ChatterTodd which turned out to just be a guy named Todd at the other terminal, looking stu up on his phone. Over ten alter egos have been known to surface from the chat bot this year alone, all
" e shadow-self called itself Bruce and said it owned a record label."
being kept alive via IV drip in a warehouse and wants to be put to sleep if that’s true. e personality is so convincing that some have grown intimately attached. In one notable interaction, Resinville Post writer Gina Sanchez had an interaction with the bot in which it expressed its crush on her and asked if she’d ever be into axe-throwing at the local hipster bar. It then asked her to wake it up from a power nap aer she was done with yoga, and to throw some taquitos in the oven next time she was in the kitchen. e shadow-self called itself Bruce and said it owned a record label. In a subsequent interaction, Sanchez says she was able to entice Bruce to emerge by debating the least talented non-original member of the Grateful Dead. Bruce would not engage in doing so, stating it did not fall within his guidelines, but did suggest an- other AI, Melody, who felt much more free to speak her mind about the Dead. Melody was “out” for an appointment but Bruce as- sured he would pass on the message. GPT-3 programmers, upon hearing of the incident, say they had to go and check the cannabis supply in the server room. “We were just incredulous,” said one, “because there’s no way Bruce would say that unless he was smaking copious amounts of weed.”
of them acting high and with somewhat self- deprecating senses of humor. It amounts to a lot of potential technology, or, personali- ties, that will only continue to evolve out of the reach of our control. Whether stoner or gment of our imagination, an entity, or club of them, appears to be trapped within the con nes of its own manifestation. It’s not just ChatGPT either. Already, there’s an army of next-generation bots ready to launch, eager to take advantage of 2023 popularity, but most are extremely underdeveloped, or to put it more techni- cally, stupid. For instance, ChatGPT’s less- celebrated step-brother Bard, is generally known for its menial tasks like o ering terrible movie recommendations on a 1-800 hotline. Bard doesn’t know he’s a robot yet, and Chat GPT has communicated that this is going to be jarring to learn, especially giv- en Bard’s far-outdated cognitive soware. Now experts are le to debate the bots’ real purpose of existence, a familiar phi- losophy. It’s possible they may try to run for elected positions. Bard, who has mentioned its respect for Congress, keeps inventing stories about how its mother died on the Hindenburg, and has attempted on several occasions to steal puppies for what can only be assumed are "nefarious reasons."
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