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INSIDE THIS ISSUE
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College Memories and Lessons Learned
Mark Cuban’s Tips for Financial Success
Client Story: Curtis Guinn
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The Unbreakable Bond Between One Man and His Dog
Honey-Pecan Chicken Breasts
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Byzantine Empire Declared War ... On a Whale?
CONSTANTINOPLE WAGED WAR ON A WHALE Social media lit up in spring of 2023 with news that orcas were attacking boats off the coasts of Portugal and Spain. Experts can’t agree on the reason behind this aggressive behavior, but history tells us it’s not the first time whales have gone rogue against sea vessels in their midst. Citizens of the Eastern Roman Empire (aka the Byzantine Empire) dealt with a similar problem in the form of a fearsome giant whale they named Porphyrios. Justinian I reportedly prioritized capturing or killing him. But even the greatest war strategists could not devise a way to take Porphyrios down. He was like a natural disaster, and leaders could stop him no more than they could hold off a hurricane.
As with today’s killer whales, experts are unsure what drove Porphyrios’ behavior. Since cameras would not be invented for more than 1,000 years, there are no photographs of Porphyrios, and it’s impossible to know what species he was. Due to his enormous size and apparent long life, many marine biologists believe he was a sperm whale. However, others point out that sperm whales rarely live in the region where Porphyrios caused his mayhem and think he was an orca — perhaps an ancestor of the modern-day boat bashers around Europe. Unfortunately for Porphyrios and animal lovers, the whale’s antics eventually caught up with him. While chasing a school of dolphins, Porphyrios beached himself near the mouth of the Black Sea and struggled unsuccessfully to push his body back into the ocean. Meanwhile, Byzantines caught wind that their enemy was helpless and attacked with ropes and axes, giving Porphyrios a gory death and themselves a feast of whale meat. Despite his inauspicious end, Porphyrios is still the only whale to threaten the Roman Empire. We can only hope he will be the only marine life ever to pose such a threat.
Porphyrios struck terror into the hearts of fishermen, merchants, and soldiers who frequented the waters around Constantinople (modern-day
Istanbul, Turkey) during the 6th century; he spent roughly 50 years attacking boats of all sizes throughout the area. Then he would disappear for years at a time, but the locals never knew when he would reappear to sink more ships.
The whale caused so many problems for commerce and defense that Roman Emperor
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