Hola Sober Sunday

Welcome some colour, joy, motivation, and inspiration into your Sunday morning.

SUNDAY FOR THE ADVENTUROUS SOBER SOUL

OCTOBER 2022

editor's note Welcome to our Sunday morning ride of easy reading and morning coffee with a splash of motivation thrown in! Our Pledge 100 TARA group continues apace with the ladies digging deep, forming a beautiful community of like-minded-empowered souls, and learning a lot about themselves and each other. I continue to be grateful to my Pledge righthand woman, Ann, our Co-Ordinator in London, who has been a trojan of hard work and leadership throughout the program allowing me to step back when I needed to rest, and recover from surgery. Ann is the epitome of this band of women who happened to see me on an interview, emailed to join the daily email, attended a meeting, and signed up for Pledge 100 Thomond in February. She is one of the amazing high-impact volunteers at Hola Sober that will shape and build this band of women over the coming years granting a safe and happy space to women who want to evaluate their relationship with alcohol. I also continue to be grateful to the Hola Sober Host team who are knocking it out of the park week-on-week holding space for women who want a daily check-in and to Beth who is taking care of social media, give her a follow ladies, she is doing a terrific job ❤️ Happy Sunday and please join me in the sober dawn chorus as we say not today lady, not today. p.s. listen to the podcast with Janey Lee Grace as it's fun + easy listening this Sunday morning. Susan Christina Creamer

Susan Christina Creamer EDITOR + PUBLISHER

hello

What are your goals this month?

New Podcast Episode with a second chat with Janey Lee Grace

Janey Lee Grace chats to Hola Sober Founder Susan Christina and it's a blast! Now Playing + Must Listen

15:05

- 14:55

FOR THE ADVENTUROUS SOBER SOUL

Peggi Cooney asks What is Self Care

Beth MT Talks about the Cuppa

Ann Dowsett Johnston with The Frog Pond

Janey Lee Grace Self Care in Sobriety

Alice Parvin with Seventy, Sober + Dating

Brian O Connell talks of running + sobriety

Jennifer Bridgman writes Home Run

before you

HOLA SOBER PLEDGE

Today we dare not forget that we are the heirs of that first revolution; let the word go forth that the torch has been passed to a new generation of women. Let all who hear us speak know we will bear any burden to support our Hola Sober sisters on this journey. To all sisters on high, know we are here fighting a new fight as a new set of revolutionaries who will oppose all who stand in our path, to assure the survival and the success of our sobriety, at our very core this much we pledge.

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Hola Sober

OCTOBER 2022 VILLAGE VOICES

TARA + THOMOND Online Class Wisdom

I love colours inspired by nature. The changing of the seasons with autumn leaves, spring brings out a burst of colour, bulbs appear seemingly out of nowhere. Here in Australia where summers are sometimes very harsh, the earth can become so hot and dry that all the grass dies off and everywhere looks parched and brown - even this has it's own beauty. Also I am intrigued by the science of colour and how that blends into daily living - the light passing through water to produce a rainbow for example or the magic of the changing colours of sunrise and sunset. I have hanging in various places around the house where sunlight enters, crystals that show me at various times of the day the wonder of nature ... a kaleidoscope of colour exploding onto the surrounding walls - rainbows everywhere � Jean P (Robinson)

I lean toward calming hues- I love shades of blue and green. I get my color therapy out in the natural world. It is truly a wonder each season while out on walks and hikes to see the changes. In spring the green is vivid, so green I’ve said many times it almost hurts my eyes after the grey of winter. New growth, leaves unfurling, green things poking up through the earth, fresh ferns in little tight green balls- it never gets old. In summertime the wild rugosa roses bloom by the many hues of blue ocean. The first weekend of July is always celebrated by a beautiful display of pink mountain laurel in the woods. Fall brings a firework of color, a last blast before the long winter. I always feel as though nature is saying, here, I’m giving you a gift of blazing red and orange and yellow before you hunker down for the winter. Truly amazing and I enjoy every second of these offerings, every season. Julie C. (Robinson)

daily email

SUNDAY

I wish to share the words from a TV show that I am a fan of 'Truth Be Told' with the lovely Poppy Parnell (Octavia Spenser) who is a journalist-investigator- podcaster. In a recent episode, she talked about truth and I believe can be said about many different things including drinking- not-drinking-sobriety. CURATED extract from Podcast Script (Episode 10 Season 2) "When we think of things past down from generations, we often think of physical traits, you may have your mother's eyes or your father's smile, maybe think of family heirlooms treasured items collected and past down over time. But we can also inherit their pain, their mistakes, their trauma and the pain of the past often writes our future before we've even realised how. Like some silent inexorable punishment.

I've talked about the year that defined my life, my lost year…My choices, the consequences for my choices…We are people of substance, of flesh and bone, of fibre and liquids. We are only invisible when people refuse to see us and I'll add when we refuse to see our selves. Unfortunately the world is filled with invisible souls…… The stories we tell ourselves have consequences, those of us that are privileged to hold a platform, why waste our voices on a myth? I spent my life crafting the image of Poppy Parnell (please insert your name here) but my own myth no longer serves me, the further I ran, the further I got from my own truth. I let pain define me, but now I'm going home, I'm following my heart back to Oakland (please insert your sober tribe name here) to a family that will always ride with me and I am free to ride with them.

As Ellison wrote “When I discover who I am, I'll be free.” those words teach me how to go home again, how to see myself and how to be visible to those who truly matter. So, thank you for listening, I am Susan and I'd like you to reconsider." The myths we crafted whilst drinking were curated versions of ourselves. A version for work, for family, for friends and the outside the world pretty much all fake as to the amount we drank or when we drank. They were myths curated in the depths of a growing addiction that NEEDED us to erase moments, things and places from our minds if black-outs hadn't already blanked them out forever. The how we got up the stairs, the what we said, that gnawing fear within rising hour on hour after dawn broke - all of it repackaged to be presentable to the outside world, in fact,

daily email

SUNDAY

to EVERYONE in our world other than ourselves.

how fabulous your Wednesday can be if you embrace the simple things, the joy of being hang-over free and heading into a day not regretful or embarrassed by our latest escapades. If you accept who you are and no longer curate a myth of who you really are as Elison wrote "“When I discover who I am, I'll be free.” In sobriety I found me and will never let her go again and enjoy the sheer freedom of not having to face into another day as someone else's version of who I am. I know who I am, I am a fecking myth-busting sober queen! Please join me in the sober dawn chorus as we say not today lady, not today.

I'd like you to reconsider…how fabulous life can be being authentic and real. Let's be honest, how many of us have denied having a hangover to our spouse? How many of us have denied drinking before he or she got home? The innocent question, “have you been drinking?” was met with “Don't be ridiculous, of course not, I just poured that.” The myths we build…… And let's go down another rabbit hole of thought - some continue to hold onto the myth of alcohol being some wonder-drug capable of making us more confident, less-anxious, less depressed, celebratory, or to grieve, or be broken-hearted or sing a few bars of Waltzing Matilda or Chandelier on Karaoke. Seriously? There isn't a drug on the planet capable of that super-bullet list of symptom- busting so can we bin that myth this Monday morning? Can we also sideline any nonsense that we have an 'off- switch' as many of us do not and if we did, we would not be in this space or reading this email. I'd like you to reconsider…

Lots of love Susan xxx

I do use color..I am a bit of a blackaholic in my attire...black pants and sweaters are a staple for me.I had a cottage that just oozed happiness, and had LOTS of color, yellow living room, apple green dining room with a handpainted purple piano.I say I am not creative, but do acknowledge my creativity with colors.I recently wore magenta to my son's wedding..no beige for this mother of the groom!I like deep green.I also once planned a room around a purple chair.I recently did my bedroom in various shades of creams, and have a tiny splash of of purple accents.I'm all over the board here... thinking more neutrals as I get older, not sure there is any change in sobriety...interesting to think about though! Lisa D (Molony)

I love color in general but my favorite colors are green and blues and deep pinks, any kind of green. I associate it with nature and green represents the heart Chakra. Like being creative I need color in my life. My cabin is filled with color. My stairs are painted pink and my doors are all different colors. May be too much for some people but I love the whimsy feel. Since being sober color is more important to me as I am learning to express my true colors or self. I like bright vibrant colors as that is how I feel about being sober. I want to tell everyone and be loud and vibrant because I am so proud of myself. Karin C. (Robinson) Well, I’m in my favorite season and my favorite colors. It excites me to put away the summer clothes and pull out the sweaters, long pants, boots, etc of fall. I would say my color pallet is burnt orange, golden yellow, creams, browns, and purples. I change in the spring. Never really thought about it, but do agree there were a lot of dark greys, and not cheery colors in my head when I was drinking. Karen (Robinson)

I really DO like to Declutter, it’s just a matter of having it high enough up on my priority list. I am going to use this lesson to motivate me to clean at least one area every week. I think the key here is to make sure to commit to not buying NEW stuff to After you’ve gone to the trouble to get rid of the OLD stuff. If I’m not buying a bunch of new stuff, then I won’t need to repeat this whole process on a regular basis. LOL! I’m going To be mindful of the idea that less is more! The mental Declutter idea…well, I might not find that My journey to sobriety is a testament to the importance of connection. For years, when I was doing it alone, I could stop drinking but I could not stay stopped. I used all the BS excuses Susan lists in the video. By admitting that I needed support, I also needed to admit that I had a serious problem with drinking. I was afraid that I was going to make my life smaller by committing myself to sober friendships. Boy oh boy was I wrong. Sober connection was the missing piece in the sustained sobriety puzzle. For the first time in my life I can say with all the confidence in the world ‘I will never drink again. I’m in. I am not going back. Ever. Even if my ass is on fire.’ My life has expanded and became richer since I gained sober friendships. My pocket sisters are my go to every single day; we laugh, we cry, exchange recipes, talk about what bothers us and what makes us happy. I know that these sober connections are my lifeline and the key to the door of a sober life. Joanna C (McNulty) Before Pledge 100 I had 2 sober connections. One lady from an AA meeting, who was very nice but the group wasn’t for me and then a coworker whose daughter is in recovery (not sure that counts, as she wasn’t in recovery herself and was a normal person who could drink 1 glass of wine & then get on with her night, but I was able to talk to her and she shared a lot about what her daughter went through). Part of my wanting to join this pledge was to find like minded people, and so far I feel this group is great. I’m an introvert and hate speaking in front of a group, so it will be very difficult for me to speak at a meeting. I spoke with our lovely Marsha this afternoon and it was so easy to talk with her, we had a lot in common. I am looking forward to experiencing new friendships and connections on this sober journey with you all. Sandy P (McNulty) one to be so easy! Louise D (Molony)

Dear Diary

There’s a term we use in the counselling and therapy world and it’s known as Naval Gazing. You will notice I love a little reference to theory here and there.Anyway naval gazing is not as you would imagine the ogling of persons within the Royal Navy, it is in fact as the Oxford English Dictionary tells us ‘the activity of spending too much time considering your own thoughts, feelings and problems’. Now as people recovering and stopping drinking I feel this is all we are ever doing and a lot of it necessary of course. So whilst it sounds a little negative in its Oxford version I would imagine this is helpful for so many of us not just in recovery but in our day to day lives. But, and here’s the big but, it feels like we never stop, like we never switch off from the naval gazing. We talk about being in the moment and being mindful but how can we be in the moment and mindful if we are actively naval gazing all the time? Trying to figure out who we are, what we are all about and improve ourselves. All this can take years and years without ever getting where we need to be. There’s a quicker way according to comedian Jimmy Carr though. Now stick with me here as many of you will know him as a foul mouthed, rude on the edge of your seat (ready to walk out of the auditorium) type of comedian, us not him walking out I should clarify. I am the biggest fan of audiobooks and I recently

listened to his ‘before and laughter’ and as it was a comedic self-help book there were some real nuggets of knowledge and information that apply directly to us on our sober journey. I have to add here that the book gave me a whole new perspective on comedy and made me realise there’s more method to it than a person just insulting people for the sake of it. If you wish to learn something different, give it a listen or read, you might surprise yourself. But I digress. We spend all this time trying to figure ourselves out and understand ourselves when according to Jimmy all we really need to know or do to understand ourselves are the following three things.

EMMA'S DIARY

#1 Who are you when no-one is watching? Because, this is the real you. Now whether you like this or you don’t, he has a point. Whether you’re a prolific nose picker or mega sweet fiend I’m afraid this is who we truly are. No seriously though it definitely got me thinking, so give it a go, make a physical or mental list of what you do when no-ones watching, how you feel when no- one is around and that will tell you what you need to know, even if it’s that you do nothing, that in itself is key. #2 ‘Google operates as a modern day confessor’. So yes many years spent in therapy, reading books and working on self-development when actually all we really need to do is check our Google history. Now of course it’s a real example but also a metaphor as we do actually know what we have been searching without actively checking on our Google history, but the concept is genius in my view. All the emails from Susan referencing women all over the world searching for ‘do I drink too much alcohol’, it’s right there, you are addicted to alcohol. But other things too, when I checked my metaphorical Google history it left me disappointed and a little sad, you’ll see why in a minute. So my Google history said: #3 Body dysmorphic. Hear me out here. I haven’t been diagnosed with this but if anyone was checking my Google history I am sure they would have no hesitation in labeling me with this or at least referring me for some psychological input.

Searches I had in my Google history: Breast uplifts, Botox, cheek fillers, jaw fillers, fat dissolver injections, eyebrow micro-blading, low carb eating, and how to get rid of piles (sorry about that last one!). That list made me wince for sure and not just because of the piles. Bringing up two daughters on this list scares me even more, especially seeing as I am actually perfectly fine and this is actual madness, this needs to stop for their sake. Next up, is the identity crisis. Searches I had in my Google history: Avoidant attachment styles, fixing yourself in relationships, forgiving partners, should I stay or should I go, signs of bipolar, signs of EUPD, signs of ADHD. Society has a lot to answer for here, labels, and diagnostics when all we are really doing is being human. Experiencing emotions, living humans. Normal (for the most part) Love Emma xxx

LISTEN

“Being cut off from our own natural self- compassion is one of the greatest impairments we can suffer. Along with our ability to feel our own pain go our best hopes for healing, dignity, and love. What seems nonadaptive and self-harming in the present was, at some point in our lives, an adaptation to help us endure what we then had to go through. If people are addicted to self- soothing behaviours, it's only because in their formative years they did not receive the soothing they needed. Such understanding helps delete toxic self-judgment on the past and supports responsibility for the now. Hence the need for compassionate self- inquiry.”

― Gabor Maté

LISTEN

.” Not all addictions are rooted in abuse or trauma, but I do believe they can all be traced to painful experiences. A hurt is at the center of all addictive behaviours. It is present in the gambler, the Internet addict, the compulsive shopper, and the workaholic. The wound may not be as deep and the ache not as excruciating, and it may even be entirely hidden—but it’s there. As we’ll see, the effects of early stress or adverse experiences directly shape both the psychology and the neurobiology of addiction in the brain.

― Gabor Maté

Color:

ORANGE PORN

I put Autumn Porn in our September issue and so many of you enjoyed it that I have included it in our Sunday morning read as a girl can never have too many interior design ideas! To Follow on Twitter Click here Feast Your Eyes on these Beautiful Homes

EMBRACE SOME AUTUMN PORN

SUNDAY KITCHEN HOLA SOBER

PANTRY TO PLATE

Soups + Home Baked Bread in a post pandemic world

Throughout the pandemic, we have all missed our friends and families and longed to share meals together. We know it is an important way of resetting and nurturing mental balance to spend time together breaking bread. Comforting staples like a social sharing bread work wonders for the body and soul . We all had this moment over the past year or two where we got really into cooking, making starters, and then trying sourdough, and baking more often. Many have also reconnected with their social conscience wanting to care for the people around them, and nurture and preserve our precious planet all in the same minute. We love to feed friends with locally grown produce and to find inventive ways to incorporate leftovers in delicious/indulgent soups, sauces, curries, and marinades. Soup is the ultimate comfort category for many at this time of the year in whatever climate we live in! This month we have some soup recipes and an easy bread so that you can share some family and friend moments this month, breaking bread and keeping it simple and real in the kitchen.

Lots of love Hola Sober xxx

Easy Soda Bread

INGREDIENTS

500g plain wholemeal flour 2 tsp sea salt 1 tsp bicarbonate of soda 1 tbsp finely chopped rosemary (optional) 400ml whole milk 1 lemon, juiced 2 tsp honey

Method

Heat oven to 200C/180C fan/gas 6. Mix together the flour, salt, and bicarb in a bowl. And if you’d like rosemary bread, add the chopped rosemary too. Mix together the milk and lemon juice in a jug, and wait for a minute as it magically turns into buttermilk. Then stir in the honey, and simply pour it into the flour mixture. Stir it with a knife for a minute until the whole thing comes together into a sticky dough.

Tip onto a floured work surface and shape it into a ball.

Put the ball on a floured baking tray and, using a sharp knife, make a deep cross on top.

Put in the oven and bake for 40 mins.

Cool on a wire rack until warm, then slice and serve.

This is the easiest Soda Bread Recipe which I can manage and it is beautiful wiht butter and a mug of tea. Simple pleasures.

Tomator + Basil Soup

INGREDIENTS

1 tbsp butter or olive oil 2 garlic cloves, crushed 5 soft sundried or SunBlush tomatoes in oil, roughly chopped 3 x 400g cans plum tomatoes 500ml turkey or vegetable stock 1 tsp sugar, any type, or more to taste

142ml pot soured cream 125g pot fresh basil pesto basil leaves, to serve

Method

Heat the butter or oil in a large pan, then add the garlic and soften for a few minutes over low heat. Add the sundried or SunBlush tomatoes, canned tomatoes, stock, sugar, and seasoning, then bring to a simmer. Let the soup bubble for 10 mins until the tomatoes have broken down a little. Whizz with a stick blender, adding half the pot of soured cream as you go. Taste and adjust the seasoning – add more sugar if you need to. Serve in bowls with 1 tbsp or so of the pesto swirled on top, a little more soured cream and scatter with basil leaves.

This recipe never fails and it is easy and soothingly divine on a chilly evening. Thiis is a BBC Food Recipe

Colette Louise

card of the week

Six of Swords is our card of the week. The figures in this card have been through a challenging time. The woman has her head covered and is looking down not ready to look to the shore ahead. Next to her, a child is cuddled close as if seeking comfort. They are being helped along by a man who seems tired but determined. Rather than using a paddle, he is using a pole feeling his way along. This is a card that depicts a difficult but necessary transition. I can’t help but draw parallels in the Six of Swords with the historic events unfolding this past week, including the passing of Queen Elizabeth. The transitions in our week may not be as monumental on the world stage, but they are necessary and important too. If you look closely at the card you will see that the water in the foreground is turbulent and the water ahead is smooth, suggesting better times are indeed ahead. Bring carry-on emotional baggage only, leave behind what weighs you down, you don’t need it and it serves no purpose. As Queen Elizabeth modeled for us all so brilliantly during her 70-year reign. “Keep Calm And Carry On.” arot

Check out from your world at 4.00 p.m. every day wherever you are in the world, to check in with yourself. Make a tea or a coffee and have a moment of gratitude for the gift of sobriety knowing your Hola Sober Sisters are doing it with you. We hold our own gift of sobriety and all women on this journey, in our hearts daily at 4.00 p.m. Join us in this simple ritual and take a brief pause in your day.

HOLA SOBER PLEDGE

WOMEN ONLY

ONLINE LEARNING FOR FREE Pledge 100 is the new Hola Sober HOLA SOBER SOBER EMPOWERMENT PROGRAM

Empowerment Program within a closed group with online kick-ass learning. Modules include science, myths, time management, and personal development. This program is designed to create sustained sobriety and a permanent upgrade to your life. It is suitable as a refresher for those in sobriety or a kick-start for those beginning their adventure. Don't bother signing up unless you are going to show up for yourself as we don't hustle at Hola Sober, we share our knowledge and support systems freely and it's up to YOU to commit and do the work. Our program includes a morning video from Susan our Founder, daily lessons, weekly closed support meetings, a chat group, and our new Tribe Online Community Platform.

Our next Pledge 100 Sober Empowerment Program will kick off on February 2023

TODAY IS THE LAST DAY TO SIGN UP FOR PLEDGE 100

JOIN NOW

THIS IS A FULLY FUNDED PLATFORM. WE DON'T WANT YOUR MONEY; WE WANT YOU SOBER AND EMPOWERED.. EVERYTHING HERE IS FREE FOR THE TAKING. IT'S UP TO YOU.

THE POWER OF FIVE

The Daily Digest (Daily Email ) Sign up for your daily email inspiring or kicking your ass it is as changeable as Irish weather and includes Hola Sober Sunday sign up here

Hola Sober Magazine

Sign up for Hola Sober the #1 Magazine for women in sobriety in the world filled with motivation, inspiration, fashion, beauty, and much more for your sober journey. A must real for all discerning women in the sober space!

Sober Support Meetings Hola Sober offer SEVEN CLOSED sober support meetings a week for small groups ensuring there is a safe and sacred space for women to share the hard things or indeed the joyful moments on their journey.

Pledge 100 Sober Empowerment Program designed for sustained sobriety within a vibrant community of women.

Hola Sober Meditations Enjoy the HUSH series in the Hola Sober Meditation library created by the talented and fabulous Alexandra Hartley-leonard.

That's it. That's the quote. Coffee!

The next Coaching Program kicks off Jan 27 2023 please contact for further details by clicking below.

HEALTH & WELLBEING

Did you know that the average time between someone accepting that they may have a problem with alcohol and then reaching out for some help is an incredible 11 YEARS!

That was the conclusion from a survey by US sobriety group The Tempest, after interviewing hundreds of people in recovery.

One of the reasons it takes so long is that we waste time trying to “moderate” or just pushing the worries about our drinking to the back of our mind. We also tinker round the edges with a Dry January here and a Sober October there. If we really want to make a change then we need to “throw the book” at our sobriety.

So how about going all in for just 5 days?

Tribe Sober are running a 5 day Sober Sprint on their Sober Sprinters Facebook Group. Why not join the people already on there, chatting away as they prepare for the Sprint. Every day there will be a task to do, a Q & A and then a 30 minute training session from Tribe Sober Founder Janet Gourand. All day support from the Tribe Sober team and of course plenty of community support from the other Sprinters.

There’s even an opening Party on Zoom on the 15th October so the Sprinters get a chance to introduce themselves.

So if you want to have some fun, learn a lot, meet some Sober Buddies and kickstart your sobriety come and join us.

It’s absolutely free so you’ve nothing to lose, apart from your hangovers!

Click this link to join the Sober Sprinters Facebook Group .

LORIOH DESIGN Unexpected treasures for your Bohemian heart.

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D O N A

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HEALTHIER, HAPPIER, AND STRONGER BEING ALCOHOL FREE LEADS TO YOU BEING

PLEASE READ

If you wish to submit for our HOLA SOBER MONTHLY MAGAZINE; please email: submissions@holasober.com

To all ladies who give permission to publish your words. Thank you, Lisa Wilde for all your support, words, and help - thank you. Note: I am not a professional designer, writer, or creator; I am a woman who drank wine and now talks about not drinking creating this platform and magazine in a moment of pure madness offering EVERYTHING for FREE. If there are spelling mistakes or grammatical errors, cut me some slack as this is a FREE MAGAZINE made with love. The HOLA SOBER PLATFORM (Magazine, Meetings, Emails, Platform) would not be possible without the financial and loving support of my husband, and three sons whose help means that I can do this all the hours the universe sends. Shout out, as always, to Deb + Judith, Gee + Colette ❤️ www.holasober.com

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