Understanding Glass Child Syndrome
By Madison Voorhies
W hen a child in the family has medical, developmental, or behavioral needs that require extra care, parents often find them- selves pouring almost all of their time, energy, and resources into that child. While this is natural and necessary, it can leave their other children feeling overlooked, not because they are frag- ile, but because they become—in many ways—invisible. These siblings are some- times referred to as “glass children,” a term that describes the experience of being seen through. Alicia Maples, a former glass child, popularized the phrase in a 2010 TEDx talk, where she explained that “glass” doesn’t mean weak; It means transpar- ent. Many siblings of children with spe- cial needs grow up as the “easy ones:” self-sufficient, high-achieving, and rarely demanding attention. “Naturally, we are conditioned not to have any problems,” she says. “We are supposed to be per-
fect. When someone asks us how we’re doing, the answer is always, ‘I’m doing fine.’” Even when a glass child seems to man- age everything perfectly, the hidden emotional weight of growing up in a high-needs household can quietly shape their childhood. This often means taking on responsibilities far beyond their age and navigating complex family dynamics, sometimes without the sup- port they need. Growing Up Too Soon: Costs & Strengths Research shows that growing up as a “glass child” can carry real emotional costs. A 2024 integrated review of 60 studies published in the Clinical Child and Family Psychology Review found consistent patterns of “parentification,” where siblings take on adult responsibil- ities too early, along with emotional and behavioral struggles. Similarly, a large
U.S. study reported that siblings of children with developmental disabilities are more likely than their peers to develop depression and other mental health conditions. The risks are particularly evident in families with children facing a chronic illness. For example, research in pediatric oncology shows that siblings often struggle with anxiety, disrupted schooling, and feelings of isolation. Despite these challenges, many glass children develop remarkable strengths. They are often empathetic, resilient, and highly capable, traits born from learning how to adapt and care for others. But as they say, every rose has its thorn. In adulthood, former glass children may find themselves overa- chieving, struggling to set boundaries, or feeling guilty when prioritizing their own needs. The very habits that once kept the fami-
18 COLORADO PARENT OCTOBER 2025
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