American Consequences - November 2020

Voter turnout was huge. But almost everybody was voting against a candidate – because they were hugely opposed to him (or him + her). And every voter was right. The vote was a great big “No thank you” to Trump and Biden. I’m glad to see the back of Donald Trump. (Although I’m already sick of looking at the front Biden puts up.) It’s not that I disagree with Trump’s policies. I mostly don’t, except for his stupid Wall and the xenophobic crap that went with it. I’m glad to see the back of Trump. (Although I’m already sick of looking at the front Biden puts up.) I’ve traveled the entire border, from Brownsville/Matamoros to San Ysidro/ Tijuana, on both sides of the boundary. The Wall is about as conceivable as a hiking trail across the Atlantic. The only sane reaction to the idea is, “Go long on the Mexican ladder industry.” My problem with Trump is the noise... I like peace and quiet, which is why I live way out in the country. But even though my nearest neighbors are a quarter of a mile away, they make a racket. I have one neighbor who’s addicted to power equipment operation. He has a lawnmower with an engine large enough for NASCAR racing, a 737 jet turbine leaf blower, and a snow blower that could pass for a freight train locomotive. This neighbor mows his lawn every day, the whole day long, starting at 6 a.m.

When the first leaf turns color, he fires up his leaf blower and keeps at it until Yuletide. I swear I’ve seen him climbing a tree with that thing, blasting the last leaf off the highest branch. Then it’s the snow blower, which he runs up and down his driveway dawn to dusk whether there’s any snow or not. He blows gravel, he blows sand, and he blows mud. And in the spring, he takes all three machines out of the barn and runs them at full throttle 24/7 to make sure they’re in shape for that year’s upcoming power equipment operation season. I have another neighbor with a firing range where he practices with his pistol for approximately 30 hours a day, nine days a week. The target range is floodlit so that if he wakes up in the middle of the night he can cope with his insomnia while causing mine. I don’t know what kind of pistol he has, but I’m guessing it’s about twice the size of the Smith &Wesson .44 Magnum that Dirty Harry carried. When fired, it makes a .44 Magnum sound like a Super-Soaker. My neighbor says he’s a competitive target shooter. Who’s he competing with, the Taliban? Having Trump as president was like having these two guys move into my basement to practice their hobbies. And the noise from Trump was nothing compared to the noise all the twinkie liberals made about Trump. You can shut up now, Saturday Night Live , return to being Coneheads at the Samurai Delicatessen, and start making us laugh again. Then there is Trump’s unpredictability. It scares me. I call it “Toddler at the Top of the


November 2020

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