would pick me up at the shop later that day. I didn’t like what I was wearing so Pearl and I exchanged clothes. I went around the corner to Nan Duskin’s beauty salon and had my hair done. I was ready for anything. Herman picked me up and we drove around awhile just talking until he got very quiet for a moment. I asked him if he was getting another of his headaches. He shook his head, no, and then said, “Will you marry me?” I said, “Sure Honey, how many kids do you want?” Herman nearly hit a truck after that remark. WARM CHAMPAGNE We drove to Herman’s house. Herman had put a bottle of champagne in his refrigerator for a special occasion. He had taken it out and put it back in a number of times not wanting to waste it on something that wasn’t really important. The bottle wasn’t even in the refrigerator this time so we drank warm champagne that evening. Then we went to Harry and his wife, Ida’s, house. Herman’s mother was there. Everyone was very happy about the news, especially Harry who was tired of having such a socially active busi- ness partner. Herman’s mother, Dora, was quick to remind me that now I would have to watch the money. Later she would tell me not to get preg- nant right away because the neighbors would be counting how many months it was from the time we were married. That’s how it was in those days. It was also during those early days that my mother-in-law said to a friend of hers that, “That girl (me) will never put her hands in cold water.” Dora was always afraid that I was too fancy for her son; I was always dressed up in high heels and lots of crinoline petticoats. I was a size 4 or 6 and weighed 110 pounds for many years. I don’t think my mother-in-law was too confident about my capabilities either. Earning that confidence would take time. We called my father, who was at a trade show for kitchen contractors. He was delighted; he told us that he was very happy that his daughters had made such good choices and that he was proud to have Herman as a son-in-law. TAKE A COLD SHOWER But the emotion of the proposal was almost too much for Herman. When we met at my house to tell my mother, Herman broke down. He was
ours. Of course I had no idea at the time it would work out that way. Once when Herman and I, along with Al and Pearl, were having dinner at an Italian restaurant, Pearl asked Herman if he wanted to make it a double wedding. Herman had a mouthful of coffee and it sprayed all over the place; he slammed his fist on the table and again his favorite phrase came out, “You better stop that, someone’s going to get hurt.” I just kept my head down, pretended I wasn’t there, and continued eating my spaghetti. Herman was going to make his decision on his own schedule, not anyone else’s. A SHORT TRIAL SEPARATION At one point, about five months into our rela- tionship, Herman asked me if I thought it might not be a good idea if we took a little time off from each other to consider how we really felt. I told him I didn’t think it was a good idea but that I would Herman - “Will you marry me?” I said - “Sure Honey, how many kids do you want?” go along with it. But, I told him, I am not going to sit at home brooding about it. I don’t know if he believed me or not but for three nights in a row he called me and only got to talk to my brother, Allen, who told him each night that I was out on a date. Three days were all it took. THE PROPOSAL After those three days Herman called me at the dress shop and asked if I could meet him. I told him my car was not working well but that perhaps Pearl and Al, who had just come back from their honeymoon, could drive me to his place. He didn’t like that idea. He wanted to talk to me alone. He
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