Pride Villager April

Overcoming Obstacles – Tony’s Story

My name is Kabwe (Tony) Chibesakunda. I’m 28 years old and was born and raised in Lusaka, Zambia. I grew up in a loving but broken family. My older sister and brother shared a father and I had my own. My mother and I did everything together. I was always the “good” kid, which made her proud of me. Our family had a Christian background, like most families in Zambia. We went to church occasionally and said our prayers before meals and bed. Around age ten I became aware that I was different from other boys. I was attracted to males. In my early teens, I came to understand that I am gay. I never liked or engaged in sports, all my friends were girls and I was mostly entertained by female pop culture. These were all things I was teased for. I was teased for being myself. My close friends, five girls and one guy, made high school so much better. They never questioned me about my sexuality but I’m confident they knew. When we graduated, I worked up the courage to tell them that I was gay, and they were supportive. This is not the kind of privilege that most people would have. Zambia prosecutes homosexuals with up to 30 years imprisonment. At seventeen I came to Canada to study at Niagara College and decided to live as openly as I could. I felt liberated. I made awesome friends who took me as I am. I felt free. After college I began to explore intimate relationships, sex, drugs and myself. I longed for acceptance and would do anything to get it. At nineteen I moved to Torontowhere there’s a large gay community.

I made a lot of bad decisions. I started experimenting with drugs which eventually led to many years of addiction. I made a refugee claim for permanent status in Canada because I feared going back to Zambia. I was tired of carrying on the way I was living and reached out to friends who had no idea what was going on. They told me about a one-year residential faith-based program. I was admitted three weeks later. In the program I learned I hadn’t fully accepted who I was. Being in rehab around 50 heterosexual males for a solid year brought my insecurities to the surface and made me deal with them head on. I felt inferior and like I had something to prove. Through guidance, I learned how to embrace myself no matter who I was around, and I restored my faith in God. This allowed me to truly experience freedom on a level I hadn’t experienced before. ManyintheChristiancommunityhavespokenagainsthomosexuals and a lot of homosexuals avoid Christianity because of it. It was because of my faith that I could accept who I was: a son of God that has fallen short of the grace of God, just like any human being. Though sexuality is a part of us, it is just a small part of who we are. Who we are is where we find our identity and I find my identity in Christ. The word of God teaches us that God did not come to condemn the world but to save it. So, every homosexual that has been taught that God hates them has being lied to. I’m proud to say that Canada accepted my claim and I now have permanent residency. I am very grateful for all that Canada has done for me and the freedom that it allows its people to experience.

519.473.5955 kateyoung.ca

I am proud to be your representative in Ottawa and want to stay informed of the issues that matter most to you. Please contact me if you have any questions or concerns. My office can also assist you with:

Living together? Make it legal! License your pet. All cats and dogs must be licensed by law. Licensing helps save animals’ lives. • Lost pets are returned home • Helps to fund animal services programs • Homeless pets get adopted Please do you part! Contact us to license your pet

• Employment Insurance • Citizenship and Immigration • Canada Student Loans • Passport and Travel Information • Veterans Affairs

• Canada Child Benefits • Canada Pension Plan • Old Age Security • Guaranteed Income Supplement • Income Taxes

London Animal Care Centre • 121 Pine Valley Blvd, London • www.accpets.ca 519-685-1330 • Facebook.com/LondonAnimalCare

200-390CommissionersRd.W. • LondonON N6J 1Y3 • kate.young@parl.gc.ca

PRIDE Villager

Issue 2 • Spring 2019 Page 10

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