Pride Spring 2023

Pride Villager

Issue #10 Spring 2023

Support Hotlines Open Closet

Rainbow Counselling Rainbowcounselling is a 2SLGBTQIA+ affirming virtual counselling clinic that supports all residents of Ontario. We believe it is important that everyone can access affirming therapy, regardless of location. Regardless of if you’re questioning, out to some, out to all, not out at all, not wanting to come out, or just have family/friends in the community you want to feel comfortable sharing about, we hold space for all folks. Our clinic values 2SLGBTQIA+ affirming, trauma-informed, intersectional approaches and we offer counselling services to individuals, couples & families. We also offer sliding scale counselling with our clinical intern therapists! We aim to normalize the diversity in sexuality and gender as providing a compassionate and judgement-free space to obtain mental health support is important to us. If you are interested in booking a consultation or want to learn more, visit us at www.rainbowcounselling.ca. You can also reach out by emailing us at info@rainbowcounselling.ca or by phone at 289-278-8778.

Open Closet is a safe space and free drop-in or telephone social support group for youth between 14 and 18 years of age who identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, two-spirit, queer or questioning their sexual orientation and/or gender identity (LGBT2Q+). Open Closet serves Perth, Huron, Lambton, Elgin, Middlesex and Oxford Counties from 9am to 5pm, Monday-Friday. Call Toll Free: 1-866-920-1601 Kids Help Phone Canada’s only toll-free, 24-hour, bilingual & anonymous phone counselling, web counselling & referral service for children & youth. The service is completely anonymous & confidential – we don’t trace calls, we don’t have call display. You don’t even have to tell us your name if you don’t want to. Ready to talk? Call or text today. Call Toll Free: 1-800-668-6868 or text 686868 www.kidshelpphone.ca LGBT Youth Line LGBT Youth Line is a 2SLGBTQ+ youth-led organization that affirms and supports the experiences of youth (29 and under) across Ontario. Youth Line offers confidential and non-judgemental peer support through our telephone, text and chat services. Get in touch with a peer support volunteer from Sunday to Friday, 4:00am to 9:30pm. Call 1-800-268-9688 or text 647-694-4275 www.YouthLine.ca Reach Out Reach Out is a free, 24/7, confidential mental health and addictions support and services line for people living in Elgin, Middlesex and Oxford and London. If you need mental health and addictions help, contact us. Call 1-866-933-2023 or text 519-433-2023 or connect through web chat at www.reachout247.ca Trans Life Line Trans Lifeline’s Hotline is a peer support phone service run by trans people for our trans and questioning peers. Call us if you need someone trans to talk to, even if you’re not in crisis or if you’re not sure you’re trans. The hotline is open 24/7. Call 1-877-330-6366 www.translifeline.org

London Pride Festival Awards 2023 Nominations are now open for this years Pride London Festival Grand Marshall and Pride Awards. Nominate your fellow Londoner here: https://forms.gle/sDuqgE6fwGeS63gS6

PRIDE Villager

Issue 10 • Spring 2023 Page 2

To advertise here, please contact Barb@VillagerPublications.com

Oxford County Pride by Tami Murray, President, Oxford County Pride The Oxford County Pride com- mittee is happy to announce our

2022 events were a huge success despite challenges of homophobia biphobia and transphobia experienced via flag vandalism. We are disappointed about the challenges we have experienced with an increase of hate crimes in our community. As noted by the recent protesters at the Woodstock Library drag story time. I am happy to announce Oxford County allies activated and united demonstrating that hate has no place in Oxford County and vastly outnumbered the protestors. On a more positive note we are excited to announce 2023 pride events will be running throughout the month of June starting with flag raisings throughout the County. Initiating with an inclusive Pride Non denominational Service at Norwich United Church June 4th, 23. Our annual, Oxford County Pride family day is scheduled for June 17th Museum Square Woodstock Ontario and we look forward to celebrating with our community sponsors and organizations. Our stage will be full of inclusive diverse musical, theatrical entertainment, and we welcome back our amazing host MC Saidat. Additional events include drag story times in Ingersoll and Tillsonburg as well as a live story time on family day. Other opportunities include a paint night & yoga hosted by Indigo Wellness, naughty drag bingo with our co-host upper Thames brewery Company other events include out Pride Dance Party including drag entertainment co-hosted by Nico’s Bar -Woodstock, Open Mic night, a Karaoke pride closing party co-hosted by the Joker’s Crown in Ingersoll. Last but not least the Woodstock Museum will be hosting a Pride escape room every Friday & Saturday in June.

As we endeavor upon Oxford Pride June 2023 we will continue to advocate, educate and communicate love, harmony, safety and security for all the 2slgbtqai+ in our Oxford community. For further information about our events please check out our social media platforms. www.oxfrordpride.ca DID YOU KNOW... ...that transgender youth who had supportive families experienced a 93% reduction is suicide attempts in one year, compared to transgender youth who did not? ...that London was home to the first gay not-for-profit and social enterprise in Canada, HALO – Homophile Association London Ontario.

Free transportation to and from mental health support in London for youth ages 16-25 who live in Northwest Middlesex county (includes Lucan, Parkhill, Strathroy, Exeter and surrounding areas). Free transportation to and from mental health support in London for youth ages 16-25 who live in Northwest Middlesex county (includes Lucan, Parkhill, Strathroy, Exeter and surrounding areas). Free transportation to and from mental health support in London for youth ages 16-25 who live in Northwest Middlesex county (includes Lucan, Parkhill, Strathroy, Exeter and surrounding areas).

PRIDE Villager

Issue 10 • Spring 2023 Page 3 To advertise here, please contact Barb@VillagerPublications.com

Enhancing Support in St. Thomas and Elgin County by Julie Gonyou and Sandra Datars Bere Equity and inclusion create more sustainable communities where people from all walks of life have the right to, and can participate fully in, social, economic, political, and cultural life. Municipalities are leaders in this work, engaging in many promising practices that are making a difference. To fully realize a world of equality and dignity for everyone in the community, we not only need to change laws and policies, we also need to change our hearts and minds. For St. Thomas’ City Manager, Sandra Datars Bere, and Elgin County’s Chief Administrative Officer, Julie Gonyou, community pride, equity and inclusion means embracing diversity and supporting everyone in living openly, freely and happily. As community leaders, they each play a vital role in speaking out to remind the community that everyone should be supported in living their life as they are and with whomever they love. Both are committed to doing their part in supporting a welcoming and inclusive community – where diversity is celebrated and where everyone can develop to their full potential, participate freely in society and live with respect, dignity and freedom from discrimination. As Elgin and St. Thomas continue to grow in population, Julie and Sandra view our community’s growing and diverse population as a source of strength, vitality and economic opportunity. They recognize that their own commitment to inclusion has the potential to impact many. By aligning intention with action they’re aspiring to create a ripple of positive change through our community to foster diversity and promote inclusion. It has often been said that municipalities are the level of government closest to the people. The types of policies and everyday practices that the City of St. Thomas and Elgin County support can have a direct impact on building supportive communities that are diverse, inclusive, open and welcoming. Our municipalities play a key role in supporting and celebrating the diversity of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and two-spirit (2SLGBTQI+) community. Sandra and Julie work with elected officials, staff, partners and the community to build a safer, more equitable, and consciously more inclusive community. Whether it be through the development of equitable policies, programs and services or by being allies themselves, this team of administrators believe diversity will make for a stronger community. For Sandra and Julie, raising the Progressive Pride flag, reading Pride week proclamations, and adding rainbow crosswalks throughout locations in St. Thomas and Elgin County in recent

years, are small but impactful statements their municipalities can make about the community’s values and beliefs. The Pride flag adds visibility and awareness and is a strong signal that our community is both friendly and welcoming. When coupled with the development of inclusive workplace policies and training, inclusive programming for the community, and a welcoming spirit, Julie and Sandra are doing important work for our community. Feeling safe and comfortable in the community matters. Feeling like you belong matters, too. Belonging means knowing individual differences are accepted, embraced, valued and celebrated. For our local administrators, helping the community better understand important and complex issues is a critical part of their job. For them, inclusivity means recognizing that cultural change is ongoing, and they must be intentional in our actions and bold in their messages and beliefs. Being an “ally” means more than just promoting signs and symbols – it means supporting the kinds of everyday actions that bring about lasting and meaningful change. It all starts with the perspective that diversity adds to the strength, vibrancy, and vitality of our community, and ensuring this perspective is reflected in the daily work and policies of the municipalities. Their biggest piece of advice for the community is: learn the history and develop an understanding of the different cultures and diversity in our community – this will help increase our awareness, rethink any assumptions, encourage allyship, and foster a sense of connection with each other. According to Julie and Sandra, we’re all in this together. There is still work to be done to enhance support for the Elgin-St. Thomas 2SLGBTQI+ communities, and City and County administrators are steadfast in their desire to build a society where everyone can fully participate and be their true authentic self. Leading by example, Julie and Sandra hope to inspire others to do what they can to support individuals in their community to be who they are and live their best lives. Through enhanced community awareness and engagement aimed at decreasing discrimination, they are part of ongoing and evolving processes, thoughts, and beliefs our community can strive to cultivate as part of our values each and every day. Working together, we will continue to honour and recognize our 2SLGBTQI+ community here in Elgin and St. Thomas, and around the world, and continue the work of addressing homophobia, transphobia, and other forms of discrimination and prejudice. Supporting Pride allows us to recognize the value of diversity and inclusion, and showcase to our residents that respect for all beliefs, cultures, and identities is, and will continue to be, a cornerstone of our communities that we all call home. Happy Pride Month!

“Let’s Talk Love”

PRIDE Villager

Page 4 Issue 10 • Spring 2023

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Elgin County Pride Summer is fast approaching which means Pride celebrations are right around the corner! Elgin County Pride is in the throws of being planned and we have many new and returning events to look forward to

Pride Festival London Friday, July 14 – Sunday, July 23, 2023 Pride Festival London, ON is back and Together Again for the 27th annual Pride Parade and celebration. Pride London Festival celebrates inclusion and diversity with our Annual eleven-day festival including three days in Victoria Park alongside a number of events throughout the year. Call for Vendors Vendors are Integral part of our annual festival and we are thrilled to welcome you back. Vendor booths start at $100 and can be applied for at pridelondon.ca/vendor. Parade Participation – Sunday, Jul 23, 2023 We are Together Again at Western Fair District Parking Lot (Off Rectory Street). Register to participate in the parade at pridelondon.ca/parade.

leading up to and during Pride week. Elgin Pride week runs from Monday, August 7th to Sunday, August 13th, so mark that in your calendar! We are having a bottle drive on May 27th at the Horton Farmer’s Market, 10 Manitoba St., St. Thomas, 8 am until noon, so be sure to bring by your empties! We are also excited to announce that we will hold a Queer Prom on June 3rd from 7:00 to 10:00 pm at the YMCA. During Pride week you can expect flag raisings at St. Thomas City Hall and Elgin County Heritage Centre beside the Elgin County admin offices. Also you can look forward to a Pride swim at the YMCA, to Movie Night in the Park on Friday, August 11th at the Bandshell in Pinafore Park; Elgin Pride County Pride in the Park Family Day on Saturday, August 12th which will feature entertainment such as Drag Storytime and more; and finally the Spiritual Celebration and Pride Walk/Parade in the Park on Sunday, August 13th to wrap up what is sure to be an action-packed Pride week.

What’s New This Year? This year you can anticipate the return of the printed Pride Guide which will showcase this year’s festival events and supporters of the Pride London Festival. If you are interested in putting an ad in the guide this year, you can head over to our website sponsorship page pridelondon.ca/sponsor for all the details. Submissions must be made by May 5th. Want to Get More Involved? Interested in being a part of the planning committee? We are currently recruiting for committee and board members. Check out our Facebook online and website for future updates.

Stay tuned for more Pride-related things and be sure to come out for some fun at the various events we have planned during the coming months! Stay proud Elgin!

Questions?

Contact YOUR Member of Parliament 519.663.9777 Peter Fragiskatos.ca

PRIDE Villager

Page 5 Issue 10 • Spring 2023 To advertise here, please contact Barb@VillagerPublications.com

Strathroy Pride by Frank Emanuele Strathroy Pride is in full swing for our 2023 season. Hot off the incredible success of our 2022 Pride in the Park, our committee and volunteers were eager to start planning for a number of fabulous events and activities this year. Our goal is to reach out to a wider range of community members while including several neighbouring towns. We started our season off early this spring with a Family Pride Skate, Pride Karaoke, and our very first Family Pride Dance. We will be attending Drag Storytimes (sponsored by the Rainbow Optimistis) in Parkhill, Komoka, and Strathroy. In May, we’ll be playing Family Drag Bingo in Mt. Brydges - a fun-tastic date for the whole family! In June/July we will bring all the colours of the rainbow to the Downtown Strathroy Market. Come visit our booth for flags, pride gear, and giveaways. And get your rainbow gear out for events such as Drag Brunch, a Pride Hike in the woods, Drag shows, the Pride Flag Raising at Strathroy town hall, and so much more! Our grand finale Pride in the Park will be held on July 8th at noon at Alexandra Park in Strathroy. Join us for this incredible community-building event filled with local live entertainment, performances, family fun activities, delicious food, wonderful vendors, and Drag Storytime with our lovely Drag performers Miss Lita and Galaxy Rose. Pride in the Park is a free event thanks to the Municipality of Strathroy-Caradoc and our many generous sponsors. For full details and updates on all our events – and for a list of our 2023 sponsors – please visit strathroypride.org or join our Facebook and Instagram pages.

Explore our suite of unique experiences for you and your friends. TourismOxford.ca/experiences

PRIDE Villager

Page 6 Issue 10 • Spring 2023

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Harbour Merchant Coffee Company by Martin Withenshaw

Margeaux and partner Michael own Harbour Merchant Coffee Company which they took over in October 2021. I had met Margeaux previously at a networking event through the London Chamber of Commerce. I reconnected with Margeaux

when she reached out to the Rainbow Optimist Club via Facebook. She wanted to donate a $1.00 for every bag of coffee sold to the Rainbow Optimist Club during the month of June, Pride month. Her plans are to it do again this year. They also a hosted a Drag Storytime last September with Mrs. Cage and Johnny. Marqueax wanted to share this recipe because it, “screams” to her. Probably because of the ground coffee rub and the fish. After all she owns a coffee shop and Port Stanley is known for the fish. Barbequed Salmon Taco Serves 6 Ingredients Rub: • 2 teaspoons chili powder • 1 teaspoon cumin

Instructions: 1. Heat a grill to medium-high heat. 2. In a medium bowl, mix together the salsa ingredients and season with salt. Set aside until ready to use. 3. In a small bowl, mix together the chili powder, cumin, brown sugar, coffee, salt and pepper. Rub salmon all over with this spice mix. 4. When grill is hot, place salmon on the grill, skin side down. Cover and cook 6-8 minutes until salmon is cooked to medium, remove and set aside until ready to use. 5. As salmon cools slightly, warm tortillas over the hot grill or over a gas stove set on low heat. When salmon is cool enough to touch, use a fork to cut it into large chunks. 6. Fill tortillas with shredded cabbage, salmon, and a scoop of salsa. Serve immediately. This is a must try recipe! At Harbour Merchant Coffee Company, they truly believe in diversity, inclusion, and respect for all. Like and follow them on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/harbourmerchantcoffeeco Harbour Merchant Coffee Company is located at 288 Bridge St., Port Stanley

• 1 teaspoon brown sugar • 1 teaspoon ground coffee • 1/2 teaspoon salt • 1/4 teaspoon freshly cracked black pepper • 1 lb salmon Cucumber-Heirloom Tomato Salsa: • 1 small cucumber, chopped • 1 large heirloom chopped • Juice of 1/2 lime • 2 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro • 1 scallion, thinly sliced For serving:

• Taco sized tortillas • Shredded cabbage

#STAYCAFFEINATED

$1.00 FROM EVERY BAG OF COFFEE SOLD DURING THE MONTH OF JUNE WILL BE DONATED TO THE RAINBOW OPTIMIST CLUB FOR LGBTQIA2S+ YOUTH PROGRAMMING DURING THE MONTH OF JUNE 1 BAG OF COFFEE SOLD = $1 DONATED TO THE RAINBOW OPTIMIST CLUB FOR LGBTQIA2S+ CHILD & YOUTH PROGRAMMING

HARBOUR MERCHANT COFFEE COMPANY - 288 BRIDGE STREET; PORT STANLEY, ON

PRIDE Villager

Page 7 Issue 10 • Spring 2023

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Wortley Pride Wortley Pride is a grassroots, community-funded movement born out of the necessity for family-friendly and all ages events for the 2SLGBTQIA+ community. We foster an environment which allows the 2SLGBTQIA+ community and their allies space to experience and explore queer joy. Whether that be through events which cater to their creative needs, or to provide spaces in which people can network, connect, and find common ground, Wortley Pride strives to create, maintain, and advocate for queer safe spaces. As an organization in its infancy, we have garnered the attention of our community by offering all ages events, fundraisers, and networking events which has enabled us to connect with the community more effectively and personally that we are striving to support. We have hosted a community meal with the understanding that our population may not have the opportunity to have a family meal due to being displaced. We have partnered with other community organizations to provide support and advocacy, and we continue to plan events year-round to occupy, entertain, educate, and celebrate our community and its allies. We believe in collaboration and connection and seek to bring our community together on the grounds of celebrating identity, creativity, and solidarity. We advocate for queer safe spaces, and fostering spaces which empower our youth to explore gender diversity and inclusion. We continue to be a proud supporter of all-ages events, drag shows included, and believe that hosting events which allow for gender exploration and creative expression for our youth builds an important foundation for supporting positive mental health and connections which ultimately lead to a stronger, healthier, happier, and more empowered community. It is our goal to partner with conducive community partners which have a long-standing reputation for supporting our community, and more emphatically, for supporting our queer and trans youth. We look forward to seeing you at Wortley Pride on June 10th on the Green in Wortley Village and our future events, and we are working diligently to use the resources available to us to follow through with our mission statement, and we are always happy to take suggestions and to collaborate for future events. This is a movement built by you and for you, and we are simply guiding the reins where you may lead us. We are a board of few, but a community of many, and together we can accomplish what it takes to ensure that everyone is heard, seen, accepted, embraced, and understood with compassion, empathy and humanity. Together, we can build a more equitable future for all. Be sure to follow our socials at https://www.facebook.com/wortleypride/ and Instagram @WortleyPride and check out our website https://www.wortleypride.com/

Did you know... ...that the first “Pride” celebration in London was a solidarity picnic in 1985? There was no mention of Pride. ...that the first Pride celebration that TD funded was London Pride? ....that the Rainbow Optimist Club – Southwestern Ontario is the first 2SLGBTQ+ Optimist Club in the world? WORTLEY PRIDE IS BACK – JUNE 10, 2023 A family-focused celebration on the green in the heart of beautiful Wortley Village! Rainbowcounselling is a 2SLGBTQIA+ affirming virtual coun- selling clinic that supports all residents of Ontario. We believe it is important that everyone can access affirming therapy, regardless of location. Regardless of if you’re questioning, out to some, out to all, not out at all, not wanting to come out, or just have family/friends in the community you want to feel comfortable sharing about, we hold space for all folks. Our clinic values 2SLGBTQIA+ affirming, trauma-informed, intersectional approaches and we offer counselling services to individuals, couples & families. We also offer sliding scale counselling with our clinical intern therapists! We aim to normalize the diversity in sexuality and gender as providing a compassionate and judgement-free space to obtain mental health support is important to us. If you are interested in booking a consultation or want to learn more, visit us at www.rainbowcounselling.ca. You can also reach out by emailing us at info@rainbowcounselling.ca or by phone at 289-278-8778.

Living together? Make it legal! License your pet. All cats and dogs must be licensed by law. Licensing helps save animals’ lives. • Lost pets are returned home • Helps to fund animal services programs • Homeless pets get adopted

London Animal Care Centre • 121 Pine Valley Blvd, London • www.accpets.ca 519-685-1330 • Facebook.com/LondonAnimalCare Please do you part! Contact us to license your pet London Animal Care Centre • 121 Pine Valley Blvd, London www.accpets.ca 529-685-1330 • Facebook.com/LondonAnimalCare

PRIDE Villager

Issue 10 • Spring 2023 Page 8

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Galaxy’s Gender Journey by Galaxy The concept of gender identity to me, is much like trying to catch a droplet of water in a flowing stream – it's intangible, almost amorphous, no less ambiguous than a cloud or the steam rising off the tarmac on a rainy day. Its very nature is elusive and yet it is often captured in fleeting moments of euphoria. When I embody gender, it comes with a feeling, a feeling of queer joy, if I can freely and unabashedly express it. A calmness that allows me to feel, even if temporarily, comfortable in my skin. The nature of it is fleeting, and based purely on how I feel that day so my gender representation changes with it. I am non-binary, that is to say I use they/them pronouns and these are the pronouns I use to describe myself, no matter what gender I feel I am representing on the outside. This allows me some lenience as to how I actively perceive myself, and has no correlation with how I may present outwardly. Some days I will choose to wear makeup, some days I will choose to dress casually, but I do not ascribe my wardrobe to be masculine or feminine, rather an alchemy of both and simultaneously none, because that is how I am most comfortable. This is not to diminish anyone else's gender journey, be it in their presentation or their pronouns, but in fact to celebrate it. The nature of gender as an expression or an identity is so unique and personal that it is important to celebrate all manifestations of it. It is important to honour the journeys that we all take, and to do so with kindness, love, and compassion and most of all, understanding. If you don't know somebody's pronouns, ask them. Even if their pronouns change, it is important to be respectful of them and to offer them a space and environment which allows them to express themselves freely, in a way that honours their human experience. We must take the measures we can to actively empower and support gender euphoria, that is the feeling of joy associated with embodying your gender identity, whatever it may be – the contrast of this being gender dysphoria. I can tell you from my own experience, gender euphoria comes in many forms, such as being referred to by the correct pronouns, wearing what I feel comfortable in that day, looking in the mirror and feeling like what I see matches how I feel on the inside, knowing my friends and family respect my gender identity, especially in private and knowing my friends defend my pronouns when I am not around. Having this network of support, and knowing that my friends and family are accepting and honouring of my gender journey, even as it evolves, allows me to freely and proudly express my gender identity in ways that are self-honouring and ultimately, a core component of my mental health. Create safe spaces wherever you are for people to express and even have fun with gender expression and gender identity, allow for spaces and environments which foster this exploration. Having that support could mean the world to somebody just exploring and coming to terms with their gender identity. Empower their experience and foster their gender euphoria by being respectful of their pronouns, by celebrating their gender expression, and by sharing space with them as they share their journey with you. Gender for some is black and white, and for some it is grey, for others it is a myriad of colours, and maybe even a spectrum that cannot be defined. It is important that we honour all phases, colours, shades and the mosaic that makes up the human experience, and

that we do it with the understanding that the journey is unique, incomparable, and that even at times, it is fun to explore, and that on its own is enough to embrace it. Simply because it brings joy. And why not be the reason somebody feels joy today? Galaxy Pride Villager Issue #10 Spring 2023 www.villagerpublications.com Publisher: Barb Botten, Villager Publications P.O. Box 134, Lambeth Station Ontario N6P 1P9 Managing Editors: Barb Botten, Martin Withenshaw

Graphic Artist: Cathy Wood Read past issues of Pride Villager at www.villagerpublications.com

PRIDE Villager

Page 9 Issue 10 • Spring 2023

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My Life, My Identity by Elliot Duvall

I was your typical tomboy. I never wanted to dress in girl clothes; I was always outside playing with the boys. I played all of the sports – basketball, softball, track and field, and volleyball. My family joked that I was the firstborn boy, even though I was the firstborn “girl” in our family of five kids. Life as a teenager was weird. I didn't fit in with the girls, and I didn't fit in with the boys. I just focused on school and playing sports because then I didn't have to worry about whom I was dating or not. As a young adult fresh out of high school, the pressure was immense to date, marry, and have children - even from my own family – it’s a Bible Belt thing. When did I recognize my true identity and how did that feel? For me, this is really two parts. I first came out as a lesbian at the age of 24, and that was terrifying. I lived in the Bible Belt in Arkansas: and lost all my friends and I lost all my southern family. I was kicked out of churches and schools and lost who I thought I was when I came out. Families in the community would see me walking to the store, and they would pull their children off to the side like I had some weird disease that everybody would catch. So I moved back north to Wisconsin with the other half of my family that supported me. I always felt that there was something else, that something that wasn't right. I had no name for it and I had no words for it. Eventually, with lots of therapy at the age of 32, I came out as transgender. I went from being pretty sad and depressed; not knowing if I would make it to my next birthday, to looking to my future and all that the world held for me. Everything changed when I finally had a name for how I had been feeling all these years. It finally fit like a glove, and I knew this was it. I knew that I was trans*, which felt terrifying and amazing, but my life finally started falling into place. What were the steps you took to be your true self? How did that make you feel at the time? The first step was to acknowledge that I was trans* and to accept who I was in my new identity. I was very privileged to be able to access an incredible therapist who helped me navigate those early days. The changes to my mental health were almost immediate. The second step was to schedule a visit to see my family in Arkansas. I knew in my heart, it would be the last time that I would safely be able to see my family. So I had a good visit - I mean not great, but a good visit. I shed a lot of tears on the way home, and then I wrote a letter to my parents and kept it with me for about two months. I called two of my sisters, and they were so excited and very happy. I called my mom and my stepdad, and they were also great. There was never any hesitation that I became their son and brother that day. They had a few questions but everything was asked with genuine concern and support. I told them my new name was Elliot, they’ve never called me anything but for the last 11 years. I called my grandma next because she was the family Talkbox. She would tell everybody for me if I told her, which worked out great. So once my immediate family knew, then I came out

socially, it was amazing! I had so many positive responses and more support than I could've ever imagined. I was terrified to come out because of how many people I had lost the first time. I did lose a few people along the way. However, the support and love from friends and family was incredible. I did hide my coming out socially from my dad, stepmom and my southern side of the family until I felt like I had enough support. And late one night, I dropped off that letter in the mailbox. About four days later, I received a text from my parents, pretty much stating that they received the letter and that they didn't know when or if they would be able to talk to me again. It was about five years until I saw my parents, and to be quite honest, it wasn’t by choice. We just happened to be at the same place at the same time, so we made the best of it. We have very little communication now, but I've made my peace with it. What is hormone therapy like? And what are the effects of it? Hormone therapy is absolutely fine for me. I take a shot once a week. My effects are my voice deepening, I am covered in a layer of fur as my family tells everyone, and I do have male pattern baldness going on (thanks to my mom's side of the family). And I'm just happy. Can you share a bit about your friends/family relationship before or after and during? As I said before, I lost friends along the way but gained so many more. As for my family down south, we don't really talk, just text during holidays and birthdays. With the current laws being passed everywhere in the states, I would probably never feel safe returning to visit family in Arkansas. My partner, my Canadian family and my Wisconsin family have always been amazing. I have never been treated as anything other than just me. And the biggest shout out to Christa, my partner. They have put up with all my firsts as I transitioned. My first facial hair, my

PRIDE Villager

Page 10 Issue 10 • Spring 2023

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Queerifying the Catalogue at Oxford County libraries At the Ontario Library Association’s Super Conference in Toronto, three staff members from Oxford County Library presented “Queerifying the Catalogue,” which detailed their two-year project to enhance 2SLGBTQ+ representation in their library collection. The project aimed to make the library’s queer collection more visible and accessible to patrons by improving classification and visual representation. Initially, the library staff noticed that the L and G components of the queer collection were overrepresented, prompting them to ensure that the remaining 2SLGBTQIA+ community were also included. The Oxford County Library Team shared their strategies for achieving meaningful representation for the entire queer community in the library’s collections and subject headings. These included establishing quotas for item requests/purchases, adding LC and Local subject headings, tracking usage, and promoting collections through special spine labels, book lists, and displays. The presentation was highly successful and drew a significant audience at the conference, with many Canadian libraries expressing interest in implementing similar changes in their own systems.

voice, my losing my hair….everything. I couldn't have asked for a better person to grow through everything with! Today, do I experience negativity on my transition? I think the negativity would have been people misgendering me, not using my correct name, and using the wrong pronouns. But for the most part, it was people outside of my circle. I constantly told myself I would likely never see these people again and walked away. That was one way to keep my mental health sane as I transitioned. How is my life now? I couldn't ask for a better life! I have been married to the most amazing person, my partner, for nine years. They are my best friend, my confidant, and the person I look forward to seeing the most when I wake up and go to bed. I have a 15-year-old kiddo who is awesome and will stand up for anyone no matter who they are, what they believe, or how they identify. I couldn't ask for a better Canadian family, and my family in Wisconsin is amazing too. I also was able to become part of the 2SLGBTQIA community in London by joining groups like Trans* London and pflag London. The friends I have met through both of these organizations have been lifelong and priceless. Many of them have become chosen family. What advice would I give to others? I would say be yourself! Be whom you are truly meant to be. I understand the need to hide if it's for safety reasons; but come out to Trans* London, come out to pflag! You can use the washroom to change into clothes that are more who you are. Just come out and be around safe people. Life is too short not to be happy. Ask questions, and talk to people. Join groups on the internet or in person. London has a lot happening for the 2LGBTQIA+ community!

Presented with Pride:

Did you know that in 2019 the 2SLGBTQ+ community has approximately $3.7 trillion in purchasing power globally? Contact Barb@VillagerPublications.com about advertising in Pride Villager.

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PRIDE Villager

Page 11 Issue 10 • Spring 2023

To advertise here, please contact Barb@VillagerPublications.com

Rainbow Optimist Club SOUTHWESTERNN ONTARIO, INC.

rainbowoptimistclub.com rainbowoptimist@gmail.com

In the Community There have been a couple of Drag Show fundraisers with donations going to the RainbowOptimist Club. Thank you to: • U.R. Proud Productions • Can’t Drag Us Down Funds raised and all donations go to support the Rainbow Optimist Club activities for rural 2SLGBTQI+ youth, their families, and their communities in Elgin. Middlesex and Oxford Counties. Include are, but not limited to, Drag Storytime, Creating Safer Spaces Workshop, Rainbow Speakers Panel and Pride Celebrations & Events in Elgin, Middlesex, and Oxford Counties. The Rainbow Optimist Club really does to try and keep up with what is going on in the communities of Elgin, Middlesex and Oxford Counties. If you know of something and would liked it shared on their social media platform. Send them an email to rainbowoptimist@gmail.com Make sure you like and follow them on Facebook to see what they are up to. Resources Do not forget about the Resources Section on the Rainbow Optimist Club website, it includes an extensive list of community organizations, hotlines and crisis support, national organizations and additional resources and links. This list of resources can be found at: www.RainbowOptimistclub.com/ resourcesTo find out what is up: Facebook at: www.Facebook.com/rainbowoptimistclub Twitter: @rainbow0ptimist YouTube: @rainbowoptimistclub Visit our website at: www.RainbowOptimistClub.com Funding from TD Bank

The Rainbow Optimist Club has received very generous donations from TD Bank that will support:

• Drag Storytime both virtual and in-person • Creating Safer Spaces Workshops • Rainbow Speakers Panels • Elgin County Pride Thank you to TD for their ongoing support. Euchre Fundraiser The Rainbow Optimist Club has started their euchre game fundraiser again. All the euchre games are listed at: www.rainbowoptimistclub.com/euchre • They are always on a Sunday • Starting at 1:00 pm sharp • At the Wortley Roadhouse (Village Room) • 190 Wortley Rd, London

PRIDE Villager

Issue 10 • Spring 2023 Page 12

To advertise here, please contact Barb@VillagerPublications.com

Drag Storytime The Rainbow Optimist Club has been out and about and very active in the community with Drag Storytime. They have been at: • Lord Robert’s French Immersion Public School • EarlyOn in St. ThomasWoodstock Public Library The virtual Drag Storytimes continue monthly on Facebook, Twitter and Youtube. • Facebook.com/rainbowoptimistclub • Twitter: @rainbow0ptimist • YouTube.com/@RainbowOptimistClub (Lillith Nox reading Twas the Night Before Pride) There are more -person Drag Storytimes planned out in the community. There is a complete list at: www.rainbowoptimistclub.com/upcomingdragstorytimes

Pride London Fest July 14 – 23, 2023

Supporting London’s LGBTQ2+ Community

Teresa Armstrong MPP London—Fanshawe 519-668-1104 tarmstrong-co@ndp.on.ca

Terence Kernaghan MPP London North Centre 519-432-7339 tkernaghan-co@ndp.on.ca

Peggy Sattler MPP London West 519-657-3120 psattler-co@ndp.on.ca

PRIDE Villager

Page 13 Issue 10 • Spring 2023

To advertise here, please contact Barb@VillagerPublications.com

Recommended Reading Oxford County Library Adult: When We Lost Our Heads by Heather O’Neill

The novel focuses on the complicated relationship between Marie Antoine, the wealthy heiress to her father’s Montreal sugar factory, and Sadie Arnett, a clever girl whose family moves to Marie’s neighbourhood. The two girls become fast friends, but then tragedy strikes. In an effort to save the reputations of everyone involved, the two girls are separated. What follows is a telling of the two women’s lives together and apart across time and across a city that loves, hates, and loves to hate them. Teen: As You Walk On By by Julian Winters Theo Wright has it all figured out. His dad has a strategy to get Theo into Duke on an athletic scholarship. But for now, all Theo wants is a perfect prom night. After his best friend Jay dares Theo to prom-pose to his crush at a party, Theo’s ready to take his chances. But when it goes epically wrong, Theo seeks refuge in an empty bedroom and has an existential crisis It is 1952, and Andy Miller has just been fired from the San Francisco police department after being discovered at a gay bar during a raid. With no prospects and lots of time on his hands, Andy is only too happy to accept a strange case: the murder of the matriarch of the famous Lamontaine soap empire, Irene Lamontaine. Irene’s soap recipes are a well guarded secret, but that is not the only secret that is locked away in the family’s enormous estate: Lavender House. Andy is soon plunged into the amazing and treacherous world of Lavender House, where Irene’s mysterious death is only the beginning. He is soon tangled in a game of old money, envy, and sabotage, while he tries to unravel the mysteries around him and discovers that a soap empire can be a dirty business. Young Adult Book: All that’s Left in the World by Erik J. Brown Woodstock Public Library Adult Book: Lavender House by Lev AC Rosen In a world where a deadly pathogen has killed most of the population, two boys decide to put their trust in one another and journey together in search of civilization. But both boys

about who he really is with and without his so-called best friend. As the night goes on, Theo finds he’s not as alone as he thinks when, one by one, new classmates join him to avoid who they’re supposed be outside the bedroom door.

have secrets that could threaten their tenuous alliance, and everything they’ve become to each other. Only one thing is certain: they are all that’s left in the world.

20 23

JUNE 6 - JUNE 10

S U M M E R

T H E A T R E

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A crop of antics and pithy observations by Canada’s funniest farmer! Don’t Miss Out!