Atlanta Divorce Law Group September 2019

How to Trust Someone New After Being Cheated On A MISTAKE THAT CAUSES THE MOST DAMAGE

Infidelity certainly isn’t a fun topic to discuss, but with over 30% of the married population admitting on the General Social Survey to cheating on their spouses, it’s a topic that warrants a little probing. Whether you’ve been cheated on, done the cheating, or know someone who has experienced either, you know the stress, anger, and insecurity that follows. While some relationships are able to work through the infidelity, strengthening their marriage in the process, others can’t survive the emotional and/or physical betrayal and end in divorce. But what happens afterward? After struggling through the pangs of infidelity, will you ever be able to trust someone new? Here’s the short answer: Yes, you will, but not without some effort. If you feel you’re ready to start dating again or are struggling with insecurities in your new relationships, here’s some advice to keep in mind. First, remember that you are not the only person who has been cheated on. Thousands of people have struggled through the same devastation and were able to find love again.

Every act of infidelity is painful and often creates lasting emotional damage, so you have to find a way to start talking about emotional damage before dating someone new. Working with a therapist, counselor, or a close friend, or even finding online forums filled with other infidelity “survivors” is a good place to start. Once you meet someone new, you can still expect to feel insecure at times. If those feelings rise up, you need to communicate them with your partner from a rational place. Let them know what you’re feeling and why and work together to brainstorm ways to work through it together. Furthermore, remember that your new partner is not your former spouse. Unless they have given you reason to feel skeptical, then it’s your past relationship causing the mistrust, not your current one. It’s difficult not to feel cynical after being betrayed, but you can learn to trust someone new. If you need help with that process, don’t hesitate to reach out to us so we can connect you with one of our Concierge partners.

How to Keep Your Family Close in a Busy World STAYING CONNECTED

If you feel like you’ve hardly seen your kids since the school year started, you’re not alone. Americans are way too busy — from childhood onward, we’re always running hither and thither, packing in as many after-school activities, work-related meetings, and social engagements as possible. It’s a problem so pervasive that it has a name: time scarcity. Families feel time scarcity keenly after school starts in September, when children’s schedules explode with engagements. But all hope for close ties isn’t lost; there are ways to stay connected with your spouse and kids, even in an increasingly busy world. Here are some ideas from counselors, teachers, and psychologists who claim to have mastered the art. REMEMBER YOUR RITUALS Rituals make up the backbone of individual families and society at large. Most people wouldn’t dream of abandoning their holiday traditions, so why forgo the smaller rituals that bring families together? Whether it’s eating dinner at the same table each evening,

watching a movie together every Thursday night, or going on a monthly getaway, make sure these traditions aren’t canceled. If your family doesn’t have many rituals, a great way to connect is to start some. MAKE EVERY MOMENT COUNT As cliche as it sounds, when you don’t have much time together, it’s crucial to be present for every minute of it. If you have a rare half hour at home with one of your kids, make a point to spend it in the same room and try to start a conversation. If you squeeze in a romantic dinner with your spouse, turn off your phones before the food comes. Listening to each other without distractions will strengthen your relationship. HUG IT OUT Physical contact is vital for closeness. When you get the chance, hug your kids, hold hands with your spouse, and do physical activities as a family, like hiking, biking, or even playing group sports. It’s been scientifically proven that physical closeness leads to emotional closeness, so if you’re low on time, take advantage of that shortcut!

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