When Love Hurts STOP THE CYCLE OF ABUSE
love or loved. Leaving an abuser requires immense courage, but it also demands that you endure the intense pain of a breakup. Many victims also hold on to the hope that their abusers will change, and while this isn’t impossible, false hope of change isn’t a good reason to stay with an abuser. Many victims point to the ability of the abuser to be kind, loving, and gentle as evidence that they don’t really “mean” the mistreatment. The truth is that this behavior is a classic sign of abuse. Most experts on domestic violence argue that there are three distinct phases to the behavior: the instance of physical abuse, a honeymoon period during which the abuser will do anything to get the victim to stay, and a tension-building period that follows and ends with another instance of abuse. Then the cycle continues. Domestic violence is not inevitable. There is not an abuser gene, and even the angriest of people can control themselves. This means that, theoretically, a domestic abuser can change. The real question is whether or not they will. For the safety of victims of domestic violence, it’s necessary to leave the abuser until they’re ready to change. If you or a loved one are currently being abused, don’t waste time debating whether the abuser can change. Get help immediately by calling the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.
The National Domestic Violence 1.800.799.SAFE (7233) • 1.800.787.3224 (TTY) HOTLINE
This season may be all about love, but for victims in an abusive relationship, abuse knows no season. The sad reality is that 1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men will experience domestic violence during their lifetimes. Despite its stigma, domestic abuse is depressingly common.
What’s often left out of the dialogue about domestic abuse is that domestic abusers aren’t just monsters their partners end up with — they’re people whom the victims
have a LAUGH
Spicy Salmon Tartare
ingredients
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1 8-ounce boneless, skinless salmon fillet
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1 1/2 teaspoons fresh cilantro, minced 1 1/2 teaspoons fresh chives, minced
1 tablespoon fresh lime juice
1/4 teaspoon lime zest
1 1/2 teaspoons grapeseed or vegetable oil
1/4 cup cucumber, seeded and finely diced 1 1/2 teaspoons jalapeno peppers, seeded and minced 1 1/2 teaspoons shallots, minced 3/4 teaspoon fresh ginger, peeled and finely grated
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Salt and freshly ground pepper, to taste
Crackers or chips, for serving
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Directions
Inspired by Epicurious 1. Place salmon in freezer for 20 minutes to make slicing easier. 2. Meanwhile, prepare other ingredients for mixing. 3. Thinly slice salmon into sheets and cut sheets into strips and strips into cubes. When finished, you should have 1/8-inch cubes. 4. In a mixing bowl, combine salmon with all other ingredients. Season with salt and pepper. 5. Garnish with chips or crackers and serve. (561) 810-0170 • 3
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