MOM & SON ESQ. P.I. - "PILOT"
14.
TODD The new address? Of course... (reads as Joan writes) 2206. West - Curry. Avenue. #900. Portland Oregon. 97236. Sorry, 23 8 . My 8 looks like a 6. Joan scowls at Todd: her 8 does not look like a 6. FEMALE AMEX OPERATOR (pause) Hmmm, no I’m afraid that’s not the address I’m looking for... TODD
Really? Well, perhaps you have - my home address from before? On Belmont? FEMALE AMEX OPERATOR No... that’s not it either. Mr. McDonald, you changed your address with us (leading tone) 3 weeks ago? To an address in... Gresham, Oregon? JOAN (whisper) Gresham? TODD I called and changed my address to Gresham , 3 weeks ago? FEMALE AMEX OPERATOR Yes. TODD Well, there’s clearly been some mistake. I did not move to Gresham. That’s 45? Minutes? From here? (grabs pen) What is the address you have for me in Gresham? FEMALE AMEX OPERATOR Mmmm, I’m sorry, I can’t give you that information. (pause) Unless you can verify that you are, in fact, Harry McDonald... TODD (beat, reads) Goddammit I am Harry McDonald born in Tucson Arizona social security number 551-04-8872! And - I bought a TV! Online! From Best Buy! For (balks at receipt) $1147? Not sure why I need such a nice TV when my wife only watches Ellen and 60 minutes but I am me! Harry McDonald! C’mon now!
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