Positivity Without Defensiveness
Suggested Strategy: Use reflective coaching to let the person digest their awareness of the situation without practicing their first instinct, which is to be defensive.
Suggested Questions:
Î Permission & The Sword: “With your permission, and so that I don’t make any assumptions as to your intentions because that would be unfair to you, I would like to share some observations with you and hopefully provide an opportunity for growth.” When permission is granted, follow with, “it is my perception that…” and fill in the blank with your observations. Î Reflective Coaching: Before you respond, I would like you to take a day and come up with four specific actions that you plan to take to successfully maintain a positive attitude and think about how those actions might have a direct impact on your success.
Suggested Activities:
Î Whiteboard Coaching (after you have discussed the actions that this person came up with over their 24 hours of think time): This allows for the whiteboard to be the focal point during a potentially tough conversation. It also becomes a visual for the person to see the path they must take and provides a level of accountability. On the left side of the board, write down how this person would describe how their attitude currently would be perceived by their peers. On the right side of the board, write down what this person would describe as the ideal perception of their attitude. Erase the left side of the board and write down the actions that this person will take to reach the description on the right side of the board.
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