The Power of Feedback with Coaching A fundamental mistake many leaders make is providing feedback and then defining that as coaching. Feedback alone is feedback. That doesn’t mean there is no value with feedback, especially when combining with proven coaching strategies that can drive self-awareness and action that lead to continuous improvement and desired performance. Sometimes leaders need to provide feedback alone and that is understandable. We also encourage people to use strength-based feedback , such as calling people into the office for the positive observations they have of employees, ultimately building goodwill and trust, so when constructive feedback needs to be provided, it is received thoughtfully and accepted. Most people dismiss feedback based on agreement or disagreement. As a leader, we encourage you to deploy something called listening chats. A Listening chat is when someone (including leaders) go to a person and ask them for two things they’re doing well as a teammate and maybe what’s one area where they have an opportunity to improve. The rule of engagement is the person receiving the feedback can only say “thank you,” without any rebuttal or disagree or agree. This is where the power of reflection and acceptance can build self-awareness. Time is a wonderful partner to the coaching process, yet most people think about what they want to say when someone is giving them feedback or to come up with reasons why the feedback is not a value or accurate. That’s an emotional response. Here is a simple process you can utilize when using feedback with coaching. Provide the feedback and then combine the feedback with the follow-up framing question, called the self-actualized question . Here is a brief example for someone who might be perceived as negative and dismissive of teammates: “John, I think you have an opportunity to truly sit back and not interrupt your teammates and listen to their ideas without interruption, which will lead to greater frame teamwork. Hearing that, what are you going to do to positively embrace that feedback, then what are you going to put into action to facilitate a positive change? How do you think this change might serve you well?” The above example seems simple but it’s a mouthful of positivity. In the moment of receiving feedback, most people enter into a defensive state. The question triggers them physiologically to think differently and to frame their mind of how they’re going to embrace it positively, and what are they going to do to put it into action. Maybe the most important part they will consider is what are the benefits to them, which we call the WIIFT (What’s In It For Them). This simple example does not allow feedback, just to sit on its own. More importantly, the questions give you an indication as a leader and coach of what they’re willing and understanding of what to do next. This is powerful.
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