Recovery Reader The April 2019
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THE LIFE AND TIMES OF GEORGE P. BURDELL
FROM THE DESK OF Dan
APRIL FOOLS’ DAY
Ever feel like your tenants have you on the wrong end of April Fools’?
Here are some ways to avoid being “fooled” this spring. 1. Set clear guidelines for your risk level in accepting tenants. Use a professional screening service, such as Preferred Screening Profiles, and review the application and screening results carefully. 2. Set clear expectations with your tenant. This includes a lease that clearly defines responsibilities, limits, and protects your property. 3. Inspect your property. Set regular inspections to ensure you are not only maintaining your property but also protecting your investment before major problems arise. 4. Set firm policies for rent receivables and promptly follow through with evictions to minimize losses. 5. Follow landlord/tenant regulations and state and local regulations to the letter to protect yourself and your property. While good screening minimizes those unpaid rents, when it does happen … and the ex-tenant doesn’t pay … see me! It’s what we do. We recover those lost rents, so you can focus on maintaining and growing your current business.
One of the Most Elaborate Pranks in History
Whether April Fools’ Day is a time-honored western tradition or a tired, unfunny festival of eyerolls depends on who you ask. Ask the mom who just got blasted with water via the old “rubber band on the sink sprayer” trick, and you’ll probably find the latter. But ask the kid who planted the trap, and you’ll get a hearty, cackling endorsement. Even if you’re sick of watching your back on April Fools’ Day and tired of the corporate cash grabs masquerading as (mostly) bad jokes that pop up like clockwork every year, you still have to give it up for the classics. Even the most bitter among us must admit that some pranks are so clever, elaborate, and inspired that they deserve their place in the annals of history. The name “George P. Burdell” will certainly reverberate through the hall of hoaxes for decades to come. Never make a clerical error with a young student who has too much time on his hands. In 1927, when William Edgar Smith was mistakenly sent a second enrollment form for the Georgia Institute of Technology, he had an idea. Combining the name of his then- principal, George P. Butler, with Burdell, the maiden name of his best friend’s mother, he enrolled the fictitious George P. Burdell in the prestigious university. Next, Smith signed Burdell up for all his same classes and, for the next four years, completed every bit of his schoolwork twice — once under his own name and once under Burdell’s, changing a few details here and there and varying his handwriting slightly so as not to raise suspicion. GEORGE COMES TO LIFE
From screening to recovery, there is no need to be “fooled.”
Enjoy the start of spring!
Dan Larson
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Cover story, continued ...
conflicts. He even flew 12 missions in a B-17 bomber over Europe in the 8th Air Force until a Georgia Tech graduate was promoted to operations officer and put the kibosh on his service. Burdell wed the fictional Agnes Scott student Ramona Cartwright in 1958, served on the board of directors for Mad magazine, and was nearly voted the 2001 Time Person of the Year before the magazine removed him from consideration. Barack Obama even did his part to further the myth. While giving a speech at the school in 2015, he began “Now, I understand George P. Burdell was supposed to introduce me today — but nobody could find him!” The only thing more impressive than Mr. Burdell’s abundant achievements is his fans’ dedication to keeping him alive. You may think your buddies’ inside jokes are long-running — this one practically willed a human into existence.
Somehow, despite the fact that Mr. Burdell never once attended a day of class, he managed to secure his B.S. in Civil Engineering in 1930. Soon after, he continued on to his master’s degree. At some point, George P. Burdell morphed from an elaborate practical joke into a bona fide legend with countless copycat pranks to his name. One of the most famous came early on, when a truckload of furniture arrived “collect on delivery” to a Georgia Tech fraternity, addressed to one George P. Burdell. Apparently, a freshman had felt snubbed by the frat and decided to get even. Burdell was continually enrolled in the school by loyal fans for decades. In 1969, Georgia Tech computerized the registration process, but intrepid hackers found a way to enroll him in every single class offered at the school that quarter. The man was unstoppable. Members of the armed forces carried on the Burdell hoax, and Private Burdell began to appear all over the world in dozens of
or during football games. Even in his ripe old age, he still has time to be the production assistant on “South Park” and read thousands upon thousands of magazines during his spare moments. Wherever he is, we can only wish him well and hope that all the would-be pranksters out there take a note fromWilliam Edgar Smith’s playbook this April Fools’ Day. After all, if you’re truly dedicated to your craft, what’s 70-plus years?
Today, people always seem to be on the lookout for Burdell, paging him at the airport
The Booming Subscription-Service Business Recurring Subscription Satisfaction for Businesses and Consumers
These companies provide subscribers with a new box of products — from groceries and cosmetics to potted plants — on a monthly, bi- monthly, or weekly basis. The impact is widespread, with 15 percent of online shoppers saying they’ve subscribed to an e-commerce service over the past year. The numbers are even higher for entertainment services; 46 percent of the survey’s respondents subscribed to a streaming platform like Netflix. The priority for most customers is the ability to customize. Over half of all subscription services are built based on the pillars of curation and customization. And while some consumers buy subscriptions just for convenience, the majority sign up to be able to customize their products to their needs and preferences.
In today’s economy, the demand for accessible and customized goods and services is steadily increasing, and companies are responding by bringing their business to the comfort of your home. With recurring payments, deliveries, and an ever-changing selection of products, pioneers like Amazon Prime, Netflix, and Dollar Shave Club are redefining what a modern transaction looks like. From movies and pop culture memorabilia to contacts and glasses, there is a reasonably priced subscription service destined to cut out the middleman for most industries today, and the numbers show that the companies developing this market have no intention of slowing down. The subscription-service industry is booming all over the globe. According to a long-term survey conducted by McKinley and Company, the e-commerce market has grown by more than 100 percent per year in each of the past five years, grossing $2.6 billion in 2016 alone. We’re all familiar with Netflix and Hulu, but subscription-box services, like Blue Apron and Birchbox, have been growing in popularity in recent years.
Whether you want graphic tees, hair-loss products, or healthy meals, there’s a subscription service for you.
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The Many Wonders of Omega-3s One Little Pill That Can Do Your Body Good
COGNITIVE FUNCTION BENEFITS Several studies have concluded that regularly consuming omega-3 fatty acids can help maintain cognitive function. While research shows no cognitive recovery in extremely elderly subjects who already suffer from dementia, evidence indicates that taking fish oil on a regular basis may prevent or postpone the onset of cognitive decline. Omega-3 consumption may also improve the quality of life for individuals suffering from depression or anxiety at any age. WHICH OMEGA-3 SUPPLEMENT IS RIGHT FOR ME? If you eat fatty fish several times a week every week, you may already get enough omega-3s, but it can be difficult to get a therapeutic dose of fish oil from food alone on a regular basis. A fish oil supplement can provide additional fatty acids. Look for an ingredient list that specifically shows EPA and DHA; some brands use misleading labeling that only shows the total amount of fish oil rather than the actual omega-3s. Recommendations vary, but most sources indicate that a dosage of 1,000–2,000 milligrams (1–2 grams) of combined EPA and DHA provides benefits. If the smell or “fish burps” bother you, choose enteric-coated capsules, which dissolve in the small intestine rather than the stomach. Omega-3 caps also come in vegan options sourced from seaweed and algae.
Because fish oil is said to improve everything from heart health to chronic dry eye, it may sound a bit like, well, snake oil. But this brilliant little supplement packs a big punch, especially for older adults.
HEART HEALTH BENEFITS The omega-3 fatty acids docosahexaenoic acid (DHA) and
eicosapentaenoic acid (EPA) have been shown to support heart health in multiple ways. The Mayo Clinic cites research suggesting that higher levels of EPA are associated with a reduced risk of congestive heart failure in older adults. Studies also report that people with moderate to severe hypertension typically see a positive effect on their blood pressure if they regularly take omega-3s. JOINT AND EYE BENEFITS Omega-3 fatty acids can reduce pain, stiffness, and swelling associated with osteoarthritis and other joint disorders by lubricating the joints and acting as an anti-inflammatory. As we age, our ability to produce tears diminishes. Fish oil’s lubricating and anti-inflammatory properties also make it a great treatment for and defense against chronic dry eye.
Take a Break!
OPENING DAY HAMBURGERS Ingredients Inspired by Saveur Magazine
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1 pound ground chuck, 80 percent lean 4 soft, white hamburger buns, split 4 1/4-inch thick tomato slices
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4 small leaves iceberg lettuce
4 1/4-inch thick yellow onion slices
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1 teaspoon vegetable oil Salt and pepper, to taste Condiments of your choice
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12–16 pickle rounds
Directions
1. Lightly grease a small
and continue cooking until desired doneness, about 1 more minute per side for medium-rare, 2 more per side for medium-well.
nonstick skillet with oil. Heat over medium-high.
2. While heating, gently shape meat into four patties 3 1/2 inches in diameter. Be careful to handle the meat as little as possible to prevent tough burgers. Season liberally with salt and pepper. 3. Sear patties on each side, about 1 minute per side.
4. Let meat rest for a minimum of 3 minutes. 5. To assemble, place patty on bottom bun and top with tomato, pickles, lettuce, and onion (in that order). Spread condiments on top half of bun and place on top of onion. Serve.
Reduce heat to medium-low
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INSIDE THIS ISSUE From the Desk of Dan PAGE 1 The Life and Times of George P. Burdell PAGE 1 Take a Look at the Subscription-Service Market PAGE 2 The Many Wonders of Omega-3s PAGE 3 Take a Break PAGE 3 Opening Day Hamburgers PAGE 3 A Chilly Legal Case Study PAGE 4
EXPLORING THE CRIMES OF ANTARCTICWILDLIFE Legal Case Study: Adélie the Rock Thief
theft is considered complete. If the thief returns and steals additional items, that could be considered a new crime and result in additional charges. So, since the neighbor penguin takes a rock, leaves the scene of the crime, and returns, he could be found guilty of multiple theft charges. If he’d decided to go big and take his neighbor’s entire nest at once, he might’ve been charged with grand theft. Now, if the penguin who was stolen from had used force to protect his precious nest rocks, the case would be complicated even further. Allowable force is generally limited in cases of theft. To prove self-defense, the victim penguin would have to show there was a threat of force against him, that he didn’t provoke the neighbor penguin in any way, and that he didn’t have the option to escape. From a legal perspective, it was probably best that the victim penguin didn’t use force.
On an island off the coast of Antarctica, a BBC film crew caught footage of a crime taking place. In the video, as one male Adélie penguin leaves his nest to search for additional rocks to add to it, his neighbor waddles over, removes a rock from the nest, and carries it back to his own. When the first penguin returns from his search, his neighbor plays it cool, but at each opportunity, he repeats the crime and steals his neighbor’s rocks.
While animals aren’t actually subject to legal action, and the Adélie penguin was only behaving according to
natural instinct, the fine writers for the blog Legal Grounds point out that the rock thief situation presents an interesting legal case study.
By taking his neighbor’s rock and putting it in his own nest, the neighbor penguin committed an act of theft. Theft is defined as “the taking of someone else’s property with the intent to permanently deprive the victim of that property.” In some places, when a thief leaves the scene of the crime, the
For now, we’ll leave the Adélie penguins to their nest- building business and save the legal cases for the human world.
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