wilh. You always have to do something about guilt! In many ways a sense of guilt affects personality! The ir ritability is often accompanied by a certain recklessness— a certain closing of the eyes to consequences — and a certain hardness of heart. You can ignore guilt for a time, but it will pop up again. Out of the depths of the subconscious it will re turn to cause trouble. The only real healing for guilt is God’s forgiveness. Even so, those who violate Christian standards of chas tity are never again quite the same. Were moral prohibitions given to spoil our fun, or rather to make possible a higher happiness, a finer mar riage? Impatience with the moral code can lead to all kinds of trouble and heartbreak. For example, the incidence of venereal disease is soaring to an alarming high among teen-agers these days, in spite of all the medicines available to effect a cure. Both embarrassment and lack of funds often keeps a youngster from seeking medical help. Again, many young men are forced to drop out of college in order to assume the sudden financial respon sibilities their irresponsible acts have thrust upon them. Many long-range programs have been spoiled by these forced marriages. On the other hand, many marriages simply don’t take place. But even when young people do marry after being intimate together, the matter isn’t fully settled. When guilt is in your heart, any little spat or argu ment is easily misinterpreted. The young wife says to herself, “He despises me because this happened to us. He treats me like a dog because he no longer respects me.” And she reacts according to her ruffled feelings. He walks out and slams the door, and it is at least possible that he may not come back. A guilty conscience causes all kinds of trouble! Down inside you say, “ I’m no good!” And a guilty conscience generally looks for a scapegoat. He says, “It was all your fault!” And she says, “ It was all your fault!” So you have blame and accusation, charges and coun tercharges, argument after argument. The fat is in the fire — because of guilt. God’s Way for Young People Think about it: Isn’t it far wiser and better to let Christ control your courtship and marriage? Isn’t it far better to remain pure and chaste and have something holy to offer your partner in marriage? Never forget: old-fashioned chastity brings with it old-fashioned rewards — the rewards of peace of mind, contentment, self-respect, and the higher delights of pure love. And chastity gives your coming marriage a far better chance for success. Chastity puts stars in the bride’s eyes on her wedding day. Chastity avoids a thousand prob lems, headaches, and fears, for chastity is God’s way for young people. Sure, it’s old-fashioned to be good! Sure, it’s old-fash ioned to have standards and stick to them! Sure, it’s old- fashioned to control yourself! But won’t you always be glad you did? I know the battle some of you young people are fight ing, and I know the power of the temptations you face. That’s why we pray for you daily. But you are not doomed to fail. Through Christ, you can succeed, for “the gospel is the power of God unto salvation to everyone that believeth.” I sincerely believe you need more of God in your life to keep you pure and strong in Him, to give you control, to keep you loyal and true to your inner convictions. 19
and violence, even when legally approved as in the case of war, are terribly hard on the home and its moral and spiritual standards. Second, in America as in no other country on earth, advertisers have exploited the feminine form in every possible way as an attention-getting device. Billboards, magazines, comic strips, paperback books, et cetera, are equally guilty in this exploitation of a nation. All this increase in exposure, the exploitation of sex in literature, the movies, and elsewhere, is being reflected in a breakdown of moral standards and conduct. A tragic number of young girls are forced to drop out of school every year because of pregnancies. Illegal abor tions have become almost commonplace. A great deal has been written about the physical dangers involved in violating the moral code, but much less concerning the psychological and spiritual damage which inevitably follows such transgressions. More and more often, “ going steady,” as it is called, begins at an extremely immature age and is often carried on for months before the girl’s parents even meet the boy or the boy’s parents meet the girl. A ll the while the intimacies of heavy petting are bringing these immature young people to grips with the most powerful physical force in the world. Parents can not always police teen-agers. Away from home, they are on their own. One Sign of Transgression Watch a young couple during their counting days, and you will observe that the quality of their relationship is invariably reflected in their dispositions. If the rela tionship is good, sound, and healthy, their dispositions will actually improve. They will live happily relaxed with you in the home. But an increasing irritability or crankiness, particularly if accompanied by deteriorating work at school, could mean something else. One of the first signs that transgression has taken place is an increased irritability, although certainly there can be great irritability without this. Healthy courting should bring out the best in you. If it brings out the worst, something is wrong. In healthy courting there is a deep satisfaction, for example, in worshiping together. In unhealthy courting, the church is often avoided. Attendance would bring the discomfort of a condemning conscience. This new freedom which young people have in going together places a tremendous responsibility upon them. It means it is entirely up to them whether they make glorious success or an inglorious failure of their lives. However, since this is not an age characterized by self-control, chastity is often looked upon as being ter ribly old-fashioned. But hasn’t morality always been old- fashioned? W hy Be Controlled? The general attitude seems to be, “Why be controlled when so few others exercise control?” Let me suggest a few answers to this question. First, premarital intimacies are tragically dangerous to a friendship, for they are invariably followed by a loss of self-respect and a diminishing respect for the other person. The boy may say to himself, “ I don’t really love this girl. She is just physically attractive to me.” The girl has misgivings, too, and may be suspicious that the boy is thinking exactly as she is. The boy may begin to doubt the quality of the girl’s conduct be fore he met her. If she lowered the bars for him, were there others? And in the back of the girl’s mind is the nagging thought, “ Does he really mean to marry me?” Then there are those pesky guilt feelings to deal DECEMBER, 1962
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