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Dispatches from the Highlands
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Cannatown Science
Petri Dish Brain Attempting To Land A Satchel
Organoids are tiny organs grown in labs by scientists using stem cells, with the purpose of eventually being used in medicine--or at least, super-cool horror movies. Now a team of scientists have taken it to a new level with “Luther,” a large cranial organoid who has grown “optic cups,” and a tiny mouth-hole. Even more dazzling, the celebrity specimen already seems familiar with the concept, and search for, kind bud.
resting whenever they came to a nearby can- nabis plant. “ is brain is jones’n pretty hard," wrote Willy Finket, associate researcher. Later on, Finket led the charge to move the growing brain mass into a large tank; although meant to be airtight by design and lled with puried saline solution, it wasn’t long before it resembled a neglected aquarium, 75% full of algae and garbage. Still, an attached camera was able to catch the organoid depress-
ingly knocking itself against the glass each time the scientists powered up their eNails to dab. Finally, a er the brain seemed to shut down in a depressive state for several months, the researchers devised a new experiment, in which the tank was converted to a
" e mammalian brain depends on nerve bers made of retinal ganglion cells, reaching out to connect and transmit information, something we’ve never witnessed in an in vitro system," Barbara Zrjkle of University Hospital Istanbowl told Dispatches. “And this one is clearly searching for some stanky dank.” RIght from the start, the tiny, the human- oid eye bubbles, attached by goopy bers, began looking to land a satchel, according to scientists on the scene, whose report was recently published in National Science Bee. Luther’s optic cups watched with curiosity as the researchers smaked spli s during breaks, “ever the more intensely when the joint was passed right in front of him, e ectively skip- ping him in the circle.” e globules continued to glance furtively all over the room, serenely
large gravity bong, forcing the scientists’ gigan- tic plumes through the organoid’s opaque solu- tion. e optic cups, which by then had grown to full size, turned a bloodshot red, while the mouthhole, still a pinprick, turned up at the corners in what could only be described as a “puerile grin.” e results were considered immaterial at rst, until the faint bubbles, or tiny boops coming from the miniscule mouth, were recorded and edited into full sounds, and then, words. “When pitch-corrected to resemble a real coherent person, it turns out little Luther is speaking what sounds like Italian!” Zrjkle concluded. “Nobody’s been able to translate it yet, but he sure is happy!” “From what we do understand, he also keeps asking for pizza pie,” she said.
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