When Your Child Walks Away

A COMPANION GUIDE

A biblical, pastoral guide for parents of adult children who have deconstructed their faith.

WORD OF LIFE FELLOWSHIP Companion Resource to the Video Teaching

When Your Child Walks Away A biblical, pastoral guide for parents of adult children who have deconstructed their faith.

Published by Word of Life Fellowship 4230 Glendale Rd, Pottersville, NY 12860 wol.org

Scripture references drawn from the English Standard Version (ESV) unless otherwise noted.

WHEN YOUR CHILD WALKS AWAY

A WORD BEFORE YOU READ If your child has walked away There are few things harder than this. Not a difficult diagnosis. Not a financial loss. Not even a personal failure. Watching your child walk away from what you taught them — question what they once believed, or embrace patterns that you know will harm them — is the heaviest load a parent carries. If that is where you find yourself today, I want to sympathize with you. Somewhere along the way, a question starts to settle in. Where did I go wrong? Did I fail them? Is it too late? Let me say this clearly at the beginning: your child’s story is not yet finished, and your role as a parent is not yet over. This little book is a companion to the video teaching of the same title. It is not a replacement for the teaching, and it is not a step-by-step program. It is a resource you can read slowly, return to, mark up, and pray through. Each chapter ends with reflection questions you can use alone, with your spouse, or in a small group of other parents walking the same road. Wherever you are in the story — the early sting of disbelief, years of quiet waiting, or the fragile hope of a beginning return — may the Lord meet you here. ❖ ❖ ❖

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C O N T E N T S

Introduction A Word Before You Read Chapter 1 Two Truths You Must Remember Chapter 2 What Is Really Going On Underneath Chapter 3 Biblical Cardiology: The Heart of the Matter Chapter 4 The Discontentment Cycle — Theirs and Yours Chapter 5 Faithful Parenting in a New Season

Chapter 6 Three Ongoing Ministries Chapter 7 Where Is God in All of This? Appendix A A Parent’s Prayer Guide Appendix B Scriptures to Return To Appendix C How to Use This Book in a Group

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CHAPTER ONE

Two Truths You Must Remember When the world seems to be spinning with the loss of a child’s faith, there are two truths we must cling to. They do not erase the pain. They steady us inside of it. Truth One — There is a difference between responsibility and control You were given responsibility for your child during their growing-up years. You were never given control. Scripture did not say, “Train up a child and they will always choose rightly.” It said, “Train up a child in the way he should go.” “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” — Proverbs 22:6 The end of that verse is a proverb, not a promise. Focus on the second part of the phrase: in the way he should go. Your calling was faithfulness, not guaranteed outcomes. Think about it biblically for a moment. Adam had a perfect Father, perfect communication with that Father, and a perfect environment — and yet he still chose sin. Samuel was a prophet of old who led the nation faithfully, yet his sons did not follow him. The prodigal son walked away from a loving home — and yet, in the end, he returned. A child’s wandering is not automatic proof of a parent’s failure.

“A child's wandering is not automatic proof of a parent's failure.”

When I counsel parents, I often say it this way: you are one hundred percent responsible for what you are one hundred percent responsible for. Bear that. You were not a perfect parent. Neither was I. Own what is yours. But do not carry the weight that is not yours. You are accountable for your obedience, not for your child’s response. Naming that distinction begins to lift the crushing false guilt many parents carry.

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Truth Two — There is almost always something deeper going on When a person walks away from their faith, it is rarely a matter of pure intellectual doubt. It is rarely careful theological reconsideration alone. It is almost always tied to something underneath — disillusionment, disappointment, or desire. Romans 1 gives us the framework. People exchange the truth of God for a lie. We drift from what we know to be true about God to something else — and the drift almost always has an emotional or volitional engine. “They exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator.” — Romans 1:25 In conversations with parents whose children have struggled with doubt, three words come back again and again: Pain God did not give them something they wanted, and they felt the loss. Maybe they prayed for something specific as a child and it did not come. Maybe they thought they saw God do a miracle, and then the miracle did not unfold the way they wanted. That pain begins to raise questions. I have watched mature believers struggle with their faith after a great loss. It is not hard to see how a middle schooler, a high schooler, or a college student can do the same. Influence Others think differently. Why can’t I? That is peer pressure. And sometimes we can bear some weight here: in our attempt to protect our child from every kind of sin, our legalism may have failed to prepare them for a world that was going to confront them whether they looked for it or not. Desire Underneath pain and influence sits desire. They want something Scripture says they cannot have. Pain, influence, and desire combine into a justification: maybe this isn’t true after all.

“Your child is not just thinking differently. They are worshiping differently.”

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Sir Aldous Huxley, the British atheist, was once asked whether it was the science behind evolution that had caused it to take off in America as a contrary explanation to creation. He smiled and said, in effect, that it was never the science. It was the sexual mores of the people. They wanted to do something other than what God had said they should do, and so they looked for a way to take God out of the picture. Desires run hard and heavy in a person’s heart. That is why this matters so much for how you respond. Your child is not just thinking differently. They are worshiping differently. They want something God would say they should not have — and until you see that, your engagement with them will miss the mark. Where have you been carrying weight that was never yours? What is the difference for you between owning your real mistakes and owning your child’s response? Q2. Looking honestly at your child’s story, what pain, what influences, and what desires do you think have shaped their drift? Q3. Which of the two truths from this chapter is harder for you to believe right now — and why? For Reflection Q1.

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CHAPTER TWO

What Is Really Going On Underneath Deconstruction is a fashionable word. In conversations at kitchen tables and college dorms and counseling offices, it has come to cover almost anything — from honest questions about how the Bible was put together, to a clean break from everything a person was taught. Because it can mean so many things, it is worth pausing to name what is almost always present beneath it. It is rarely just an argument People do have real intellectual questions, and those questions deserve real answers. But in my experience, very few people leave the faith because an argument finally beat them. Most leave because something in them was already pulling, and the argument gave them permission. That is not a cynical read. It is a biblical one. Romans 1 describes a suppression of what is known about God that is driven by unrighteousness, not just by reasoning. That means the best response to a wandering child is not first a better debate. It is a clearer sight of what their heart is actually chasing. Three forces almost always at work Chapter one introduced pain, influence, and desire. It is worth sitting with them long enough to see how they braid together. Pain is the most sympathetic of the three. A prayer went unanswered. A loved one died. A church wounded them. A leader fell. A shame they carried felt like it was never going to be met with grace. Pain is real, and it deserves to be named without flinching. Influence is the most subtle. A roommate. A professor. A podcast. A boyfriend or girlfriend. An online community that spoke into a lonely place. Influence rarely announces itself as a rival gospel. It just becomes the air they breathe until the faith they were handed starts to smell strange. Desire is the deepest. It is the ache underneath the other two — the settled want for a life the Bible would not endorse, or a self the Bible would not affirm. Desire is the reason pain and influence stick.

“Pain, influence, and desire become the justification to say: maybe this isn’t true after all.”

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Why this matters for you This matters because it reshapes your posture. If the real engine is desire and not argument, then winning the argument will not bring them home. What brings someone home is the slow, costly work of the Holy Spirit in a heart, ordinarily through the presence of people who will not go away, and through a gospel spoken without flinching and without cruelty. You are not the Holy Spirit. You do not have to be. You have a different and smaller job, and we will come to it in Chapter 6.

For Reflection Q1.

If you tried to name the pain underneath your child’s drift, what would you say

out loud?

Q2.

What influences have been loudest in their life in the last five years — and what

have you noticed about the voices they trust? Q3.

What desire do you suspect is at the bottom? How do you want to pray about

it?

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CHAPTER THREE

Biblical Cardiology — The Heart of the Matter The Bible describes the heart as the control center of a human life. It is made up of three things: what we feel, what we think, and what we choose — emotions, mind, and will. Call it biblical cardiology. The control center Every decision you have ever made came out of that control room. What you felt about it. What you thought about it. What you finally chose. We have watched that play out in our children since they were toddlers. We are still watching it now. A heart submitted to Christ A believer who is walking with the Lord is learning, slowly, to say, “Not my will, but yours be done.” Their emotions are being shaped by trust, not tossed by circumstance. Even in suffering, they reach for joy because they are trusting God. They overcome fear because perfect love casts out fear. They are bringing every thought captive to the mind of Christ. Emotions, mind, and will — under the lordship of Jesus. “We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.” — 2 Corinthians 10:5 A heart not submitted to Christ A son or daughter who has walked away is no longer operating that way. The control center is no longer under the submission of God. Emotions become the final authority — what feels true is true. The mind drifts toward whatever confirms what they already want. The will reaches for what it wants and calls that freedom. This is why the decisions look so confusing from the outside. This is why destructive patterns show up in their relationships, their work, their bodies, their families. It is not that your child has become unintelligent. It is that the steering wheel of their inner person is being turned by something other than Christ.

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“Emotions, mind, and will — when they are not under Christ, everything downstream is confused.”

Why this is hopeful This may sound grim, but it is actually hopeful — for two reasons.

First, it names the real problem. You are not fighting your child’s bad arguments or bad friends as if those were the root. You are watching a heart in rebellion, and a rebelling heart is exactly the kind of heart the gospel was made for. Second, it tells you what to pray for. You are not praying primarily for a change of opinion. You are praying for a change of lordship.

For Reflection Q1.

Which of the three — emotions, mind, or will — seems to be most clearly

driving your child right now?

Q2. Q3.

And which of those three is most often driving you as you respond to them? What would it look like to pray for a change of lordship rather than just a

change of behavior?

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CHAPTER FOUR

The Discontentment Cycle — Theirs and Yours James 4 gives us the anatomy of a restless, unsubmitted heart. Read it slowly. “What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.” — James 4:1–3 Notice that passions opens verse 1 and closes verse 3. This is a cycle. Let me walk you through the vocabulary. Passions The word gives us our English word hedonism. It means the pursuit of pleasure at all costs. Desire The Greek word is neutral in itself; its moral weight is determined by its object. A husband who desires to spend quality time with his wife is a man with a good desire. A husband who desires to spend quality time with another man’s wife is a man with a bad desire. The posture looks the same. The object changes everything. Coveting Coveting is wanting to keep warm by what belongs to someone else — seeing what another person has and wishing you had it. Psalm 73 is the believer’s honest wrestling with this. The psalmist sees the ungodly prosper and has to fight to stop wanting what they have. Fighting and quarreling The passions finally leak out into the relationships. Arguments, broken friendships, fractured homes. The cycle feeds itself. The cycle in your child This is the cycle your son or daughter is caught in. They have redefined pleasure away from how God defines it. That awakens a desire. The desire looks at someone else and imagines a better life.

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The pursuit never actually satisfies — it only deepens the discontent. And the fallout damages the relationships around them, including their relationship with you.

“What they are pursuing will never bring satisfaction. It will only bring more discontentment.”

The cycle in you Here is where I want to slow down. Because you, too, can fall into a version of this same cycle — often without realizing it. A parent who is grieving a wandering child can elevate a good desire — their return — to the position of an idol. The thought becomes: if only they come back, then I will be content. If only they return to the Lord, then I will be able to rest. There is a real place for lamenting. There is no place for letting a good desire become the thing you cannot live without. That kind of discontent poisons your marriage. It poisons your other children. It poisons your service in the church. It poisons your prayers. You become unable to offer your child the steady, un-grasping love they actually need from you. A better prayer So pray this way, slowly, as many times as you need to: Lord, I want them back. And Lord, even if you are not ready to bring them back today, you are enough. You have been enough every day I have served you. You will be enough tomorrow. That prayer does not dull the grief. It keeps the grief from becoming an idol.

For Reflection Q1.

Where do you see the four-part cycle — passions, desire, coveting, fighting — in

your child’s life right now?

Q2. Q3.

Where do you see a version of that cycle in your own heart as a grieving parent? What good desire have you elevated into an idol? What would it look like to lay

it back down this week?

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CHAPTER FIVE

Faithful Parenting in a New Season When your child was young, you led them in ways that feel almost quaint now. You led by instruction: you taught them who God is and how to tell the truth and what prayer is. You led by structure: you told them when to eat, when to sleep, when practice started, when to make the bed. And you led by correction: sometimes legalistically, sometimes compassionately, always imperfectly. What do you do now — when you are no longer parenting a child over whom you have that kind of control? The shift Your parental role is not over. It has shifted. You are no longer the primary authority structure in their life, and trying to be will only burn the bridge faster. You are now a faithful witness. You are an intercessor. You are a waiting father on the porch. The shift is from controlling to commending. From managing to ministering. From setting the rules of their life to speaking truth into a life they are now setting the rules of. This feels like a loss. It is not. It is the same calling — faithfulness — expressed in a new form.

“Your role is not over. It has shifted — from controlling to commending.”

Two temptations to resist Two temptations sit on either side of you in this season, and both will ruin you if you give in. The first is withdrawal. “I just can’t deal with this anymore.” You stop calling. You stop visiting. You let the distance do what the disagreement started. This is understandable, and it is devastating. The second is capitulation. You water down the truth because you cannot stand to push them any further away. You stop saying what God has said about sin because you do not want to lose them. This, too, is understandable, and this, too, is devastating — in a different direction.

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“Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ.” — Ephesians 4:15 Notice the two words held together. Truth. Love. Not one without the other. The next chapter gets specific about what this looks like in practice.

For Reflection Q1.

Which temptation pulls at you harder — withdrawing, or softening the truth so

you don’t lose them? Why that one?

Q2.

In what ways have you tried to keep parenting your adult child the way you

parented your young child? What did that produce? Q3.

What would a shift from controlling to commending look like in your next

conversation with them?

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CHAPTER SIX

Three Ongoing Ministries Your parental role has shifted into three ongoing ministries. These are not techniques. They are postures you return to over months and years. Hold all three together. Any one of them without the other two does damage. Ministry One — Stay present without compromising truth Stay involved. I tell parents all the time: don’t let your end of the bridge burn. Your child may be setting fire to their end. Do not set fire to yours. As we just saw, the two temptations are withdrawal and watering down. Resist both. God does not affirm what God calls sin, and neither do you. But you also do not disappear from their life. Once your child knows where you stand — and I assume they do — you do not have to turn every visit into a verbal reminder. Being in their presence and simply enjoying your son or daughter is not approval of everything they are doing. It is just being present.

“Presence does not mean approval. You can be present — and when the moment comes, you can still speak the truth in love.”

When the opportunity comes to speak truth, speak it. That is not rejection. Just make sure it is spoken in love. Chapter five said this. It bears repeating here, because every parent I know of a wandering child forgets it at some point. Ministry Two — Ask better questions than you give speeches At this stage of their life, lectures harden the heart. Questions invite reflection. Instead of “How can you believe that?” try, “Help me understand what led you there.” Instead of, “Don’t you see where this is going?” try, “What do you feel like you lost — or didn’t find — in your faith?” Instead of, “I don’t know why you do that,” try, “What do you think will actually satisfy what you’re looking for?”

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You can hear the difference, can’t you? Even a question can sound like an accusation if the tone is wrong. Get the tone right.

“A question stirs the conscience. An accusation hardens the will.”

When you ask a real question, you are not interrogating them. You are drawing out the heart. You are giving the Holy Spirit an opportunity to do what only the Holy Spirit can do. Sometimes when I ask a question I will say, “I don’t need an answer today. Just sit with it.” Then, over a cup of coffee a week later, we talk about it again. The question keeps doing its quiet work between conversations. Your job is not to paint them into a corner with your questions. Your job is to draw them out of the corner into a conversation. Ministry Three — Keep the gospel central, not peripheral It is painfully easy to drift — into behavior management, into cultural disagreements, into political arguments, into frustration about whom they are dating or whether they came to Thanksgiving. Those things are real. They are not central. In your heart, always, keep the gospel as the central issue. Your child’s deepest need has not changed from when they were five. What they need is reconciliation with God through Christ. Keep these words circling in your mind so they are ready when the conversation makes room for them: sin, grace, substitution, forgiveness, new life. “But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” — Romans 5:8 Don’t make it a sermon. Weave it. That is why you ask the questions — so that the gospel can come up naturally when the conversation opens a door. A word about study This season will require more study of you than the years when they were little. Children often believe naturally because they were taught. Adult children struggle with specific things, and they

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have thought about them more than you realize. That means you need to read and study more — not so you can win a debate, but so that when a real question comes, you are not caught flat.

For Reflection Q1.

On a scale of one to ten — how present are you in your child’s life right now, and how unflinching have you been with truth? Which number needs to move? Q2. Write down three questions you could ask your child in your next real conversation. Which of them could sound like an accusation if the tone slipped? Q3. When did the gospel last surface naturally between you and your child? What would need to change for it to surface again?

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CHAPTER SEVEN

Where Is God in All of This? You may have asked it by now — maybe out loud, maybe in the quiet of a sleepless night. I tried to raise them well. I tried to disciple them. I tried to keep them in church. So where is God in all of this? He is not absent If you have ever woken up at three in the morning thinking, “I am worried about my child,” let me remind you that someone else is already awake. The psalmist says that God neither slumbers nor sleeps. He is always actively watching over your child and calling them back. “He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber. Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.” — Psalm 121:3–4 Your most important work is prayer If all of this is true — that your role has shifted, that your child’s heart is the real battlefield, that only the Holy Spirit can do this work — then your most important work, the work you have the most leverage in, is prayer. Do not pray only the simple request: “Please bring them back.” Pray in a biblical pattern. “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” — Philippians 4:6 Supplication carries the idea of being brought low. Learn to come with humility. Do not be afraid to lament. Do not be afraid to weep. Do not be afraid to call out to God passionately. Bring everything — the small things and the large — because everything is under his control. And include thanksgiving. Find a way to thank him for who he is before you bring the request. Thanksgiving is what keeps prayer from becoming one long complaint. God’s pattern in Scripture When you scan the Bible for how God handles people who are running, a pattern emerges.

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Jonah was running as fast as he could. God said, “Go that way.” Jonah went the other way. God pursued him — all the way into the middle of the Mediterranean — and gave him, of all things, a submarine ride back. Peter denied Christ three times. What did Christ do? He pursued. He showed up on the beach. He cooked him breakfast. And he asked him three questions. A question stirs the conscience. And then there is the prodigal son. The father allowed the wandering, but he never lost sight of him. He was on the porch.

“God allows the wandering. He never loses sight.”

One final thing Notice in the prodigal’s story that the son was alone. He was not being chased down a road. But he came to himself. There is a stage where the prodigal revisits reality — and that is what you are praying for. “But when he came to himself, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have more than enough bread, but I perish here with hunger! I will arise and go to my father.’ … But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and That language would have been almost scandalous in a Middle Eastern culture. Elders did not run. They waited for others to come to them. But here, Jesus points out something about the father — and about the Father — that changes everything. Compassion does not only wait. Upon the return, compassion runs. Your child right now may be in a chapter of rebellion. They may have walked a long way off. But God has not lost sight of them. He writes complete stories. You are only in the middle of one. May God bless you in the difficulty of waiting for a child to return. And may you do it with faithfulness, with lament, with grace, and with compassion. kissed him.” — Luke 15:17–20

For Reflection

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Q1.

When you pray for your child, which is loudest — supplication, lament, or

thanksgiving? Which needs to grow?

Q2.

Which Scripture in this chapter — Jonah, Peter, the prodigal — most meets you

where you are today, and why?

Q3.

If the father ran when the son was still a long way off, what would running look like for you when your child takes the first step back — a phone call, a visit, a hard question?

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APPENDIX A

A Parent’s Prayer Guide Use this guide as a weekly rhythm. Pray one section each day. On the seventh day, rest — and trust. Day 1 — Adoration Father, you neither slumber nor sleep. You are not anxious about my child. You see them when I cannot. You knew them in the womb and you know them now. You are patient, and you are kind, and you are holy. I praise you before I ask you for anything. Day 2 — Confession Lord, I confess the weight I have carried that is not mine to carry. I confess the weight I have refused to carry that is. I confess the places I parented in fear rather than in faith, and the places I parented in pride rather than in love. Forgive me. Wash me. Free me. Day 3 — Their Heart God, you see the emotions, mind, and will of my child. Where their emotions drive them, gentle them. Where their thinking is darkened, give light. Where their will is set against you, break it in mercy. Change the lordship. Do not just change the behavior. Day 4 — Their Desire Lord, whatever desire is running hardest and heaviest in their heart, expose its emptiness. Let every well they drink from leave them thirstier. Let every pleasure they chase leave them hungrier. And when they come to themselves, let your goodness be waiting for them. Day 5 — Me as Their Parent Father, make me present without compromise. Make me truthful without cruelty. Keep my end of the bridge from burning. Give me better questions than I have ever asked. Keep the gospel central in my own heart so it has a chance of being central in theirs. And keep my good desire for their return from becoming the idol I worship.

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Day 6 — Supplication Lord, I ask plainly. Bring them back. Bring them back to you. Bring them back to sound doctrine. Bring them back to a church where the gospel is preached. Bring them back, if it is your will, into relationship with us. Do it slowly if that is best. Do it quickly if that is best. But do it. And while I wait, sustain me. Day 7 — Thanksgiving Father, I thank you that you are still writing the story. I thank you for the years I had with them when they were young and their heart was soft. I thank you for every answered prayer I have already received and every prayer you are answering that I cannot yet see. I thank you that you ran when the prodigal was still a long way off. Thank you that you will run again.

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APPENDIX B

Scriptures to Return To When a single verse carries you through a hard week, mark it. Write the date. Come back to it a year from now. Below are the passages referenced throughout this book, grouped so you can find them quickly. When you are tempted to think it is all your fault • Proverbs 22:6 — Train up a child in the way he should go. • 1 Samuel 8:1–3 — Samuel’s sons did not walk in his ways. • Ezekiel 18:20 — The soul who sins shall die. The son shall not suffer for the iniquity of the father. When you need to see what is really going on in their heart • Romans 1:18–25 — They exchanged the truth of God for a lie. • James 4:1–3 — The anatomy of a restless, unsubmitted heart. • Jeremiah 17:9 — The heart is deceitful above all things. When you need to know what kind of parent to be now • Ephesians 4:15 — Speaking the truth in love. • Colossians 4:6 — Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt. • 2 Timothy 2:24–26 — Gentle, able to teach, patiently enduring evil. When you need to know that God is not done • Psalm 121:3–4 — He who keeps you will not slumber. • Jonah 1–2 — God pursues the runner. • John 21:15–19 — Christ restores Peter with three questions. • Luke 15:11–24 — The father sees the son while he is still a long way off. When you need a place to stand in prayer • Philippians 4:6–7 — By prayer and supplication with thanksgiving. • Romans 8:26–27 — The Spirit intercedes with groanings too deep for words. • Romans 5:8 — While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

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APPENDIX C

How to Use This Book in a Group Many parents who are walking this road feel desperately alone. They are not, but they feel it. A small group of four to eight parents — ideally couples with one or two single parents welcome — can be one of the most steadying things God brings into this season. Here is a simple eight-week plan. A simple eight-week plan 1. Week 1 — Introduction and Chapter 1. Let every person tell their story in their own words before any teaching happens. 2. Week 2 — Chapter 2. Name the pain, influence, and desire in each family’s story. 3. Week 3 — Chapter 3. Walk through biblical cardiology together. Pray for a change of lordship. 4. Week 4 — Chapter 4. Confess out loud any good desire that has become an idol. 5. Week 5 — Chapter 5. Discuss the two temptations — withdrawal and watering down. Which one has pulled at each person? 6. Week 6 — Chapter 6. Each person writes three real questions to ask their child. Share them for refinement. 7. Week 7 — Chapter 7. Pray the Philippians 4 pattern together, out loud. 8. Week 8 — Use Appendix A as a guided prayer meeting. Commit to keep praying together every two weeks. Ground rules for the group • What is said in the room stays in the room. Always. • No one is allowed to defend their child or criticize their child without being gently interrupted by the group. Neither serves the work. • Every session ends with prayer for each family by name. • No advice without invitation. Listening is the ministry. • If a parent has not shown up for two weeks, someone from the group calls. Not texts. Calls.

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A word to churches and small group leaders If you are leading this group as a pastor, small group leader, or women’s or men’s ministry director, please do not rush it. The families in the room have been grieving quietly for years. Eight weeks is the floor, not the ceiling. And if the group wants to keep meeting after week eight — let them. The friendships that form in this room may be the closest they come to an answered prayer for a long season. ❖ ❖ ❖ A CLOSING WORD Your child’s story is not yet finished, and your role as a parent is not yet over. Word of Life Fellowship 4230 Glendale Rd, Pottersville, NY 12860 | wol.org

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