2. The apostle first admonishes us to deny the kingdom of self: “Do not use your freedom as an opportunity for [NIV to indulge ] the flesh…” What, in practical terms, does it mean to indulge the flesh? Are fleshly temptations in marriage always “big sins” such as lust, or do they include pettiness, bickering and tit-for-tat? Give some real-life temptations that you have indulged in your own experience. 3. “A good marriage is a good marriage because people in that marriage say No! ” Discuss what Tripp means in saying this. Bring into your discussion the fact of our freedom in Christ—are we powerless before selfish temptation, or are we able to resist it? Read aloud Paul’s doxology at Ephesians 3:20-21 . How much sanctifying work can God achieve in our hearts by his Spirit? Is sin’s temptation more powerful than the Holy Spirit? 4. Since we have been set free from sin by Christ, and since God’s omnipotent Spirit is wondrously working within us—what is the only reason that we sin? What is the only reason you are petty and unkind to your loved one? What specific , practical means can you use to remind yourself of this fact in future “little moments” when you would be unkind or petty to your loved one? 5. Rather than living in the kingdom of self, the apostle charges us to live according to the Kingdom of God: “…but through love serve one another. For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’” Read aloud Romans 6:20-23 . As Christians, we are freed from the law in that it is no longer our judge in determining our righteousness, but are we freed from obedience to the law as God’s standard for holy living? 6. Read aloud Matthew 22:34-40 (Jesus here quotes Deuteronomy 6:5 and Leviticus 19:18 ). In our Galatians passage, Paul says that “the whole law is fulfilled in one word: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’” But what about the “love God with all your heart” part? What is Tripp’s explanation for why Paul cites only “love your neighbor”? Is it possible to love our spouse as you should, without first loving God as you should? Explain then what Tripp means by “You don’t first fix marriages horizontally; you fix them first vertically.” 7. Read aloud 1 John 4:7-11 . Then read aloud this definition of love: Love is willing self-sacrifice for the good of another that does not demand reciprocation or that the person being loved is deserving . How is this a “cruciform” ( cross-shaped ) definition? (Hint: Jesus!) Consider particularly the last component: [ Love ] does not demand reciprocation or that the person being loved is deserving . Read aloud Romans 5:6-10 . Is it acceptable to insist that your spouse meet you halfway, and that you both start working on your marriage at the same time and with the same effort? Or should you be like Christ, who went the whole way and loved us while we hated him? And on a different heading, is it possible that your spouse’s unwillingness to reciprocate is the result of how you have treated them in the past? 8. Later in 1 John (4:19) , the apostle says “We love because he [Jesus] first loved us.” Tripp says that “true love is best born in the soil of gratitude .” How will remembering always how much God in Christ loves us and has forgiven us assist us in humbly and willingly loving our partner? On the other hand, what is the result of forgetting Christ’s so-great love for us?
Session 7
WHAT DID YOU EXPECT?
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