American Consequences - November 2018

INVESTMENT WHY BAD INVESTMENT ADVICE? Plenty of good investment advice is available (much of it right here in this magazine). But do we listen to that good advice? No, usually we don't. Then we feel bad about ourselves. Maybe we need bad investment advice. When we don't listen to bad investment advice, we feel good about ourselves. At least that's P.J.'s reasoning... P.J. is well-known for his bad investment advice (and for feeling good about himself). He has his kids' college savings 529 plans all in General Electric stock and Toys "R" Us bonds. "Sure," says P.J., "they'll be going to Skinhead Barber College – if they're lucky. But this way I'm 'ahead of the curve' as an investor. Sooner or later the bull market is going to crash and everybody will be broke and I'll be able to brag, 'I got in on the ground floor!'" Here are some of the investment ideas P.J. is considering right now. Take a look at them yourself – then run for your life. (Maybe in a pair of WalkShare TM shoes.)

Farmland for the Small Investor American farmland has been an excellent risk-free investment, rising steadily from an average price of $1,340 per acre in 2004 to $3,140 per acre in 2018 with almost no market downturns. However, for the small investor, purchasing farmland presents various difficulties. I've solved them. A 40-pound bag of topsoil sells for $1.29 at Walmart. For only $9 a week, you can build a 7.3 ton "black gold" portfolio in just one year. (Or, better yet, dig in your own back yard for free.) A 40-pound bag of topsoil will cover 12 square feet. There are 43,560 square feet in an acre. You'll be "piling up" enough per annum to cover 4,380 square feet. Start at age 20 and by the time you retire you'll have a valuable 4.5-acre farm. Given the way farmland prices have been going up, you'll be "rolling in clover." Science keeps harnessing the forces of nature – solar, wind, geothermal, and next... gravity! Unlimited clean power will soon be available from the kinetic energy of great big things rolling downhill. After all, America is full of hills and also full of great big things. I've been following patent applications from researchers at the University of GoFundMe and other prestigious educational institutions, and I'm convinced that gravity is where the smart money will "drop." The Next Frontier in Alternative Energy

WalkShare Shoes Just "untie" them with your smartphone app and walk anywhere you want! Leave your WalkShare TM shoes wherever you step out of them! A hot new Silicon Valley start-up is pioneering this novel form of personal transportation, similar to Bird dock-less electric scooters, but without the bothersome electricity or potentially hazardous scooting. Soon to be available in most major cities. Unprecious Non-Metals It's a box of rocks. This commodity – with proven value going back to the great pyramids of ancient Egypt – is trading at such low levels that it has nowhere to go but up!

26 November 2018

Made with FlippingBook Annual report