American Consequences - September 2018

PJ’S TOP 10 TIPS

on Health

3.  Buy a treadmill or other large, bulky fitness machine Fitness machines burn calories:

1.  Drink six 12-ounce glasses of water a day Beer is 90% water. Wine is 80% water. Scotch is 60% water. Thus 7 beers, 14 glasses of wine, or 13 highballs should do it. 2. Cut down on salt Stick to beer, whiskey, and wine. Knock it off with the margaritas.

• Getting fitness machine from exercise equipment store into car trunk 150 calories • Getting fitness machine out of car trunk and into the house 175 calories • Assembling fitness machine 200 calories • Paying teenager next door to assemble fitness machine correctly 10 calories • Moving fitness machine from spare bedroom where it takes up too much space to rec room 140 calories • Dragging fitness machine from rec room where it also takes up too much space down to thebasement 560 calories • Getting fitness machine back up the basement stairs 1,480 calories • Hauling it to the dump 225 calories

26 September 2018

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