“Let people come and give you a break. Also, take meals that are made for you. You will never know when you won’t be in the mood to cook. Tell people the foods your family likes…it’s okay to be specific!” — Sarah
CONSIDER YOUR STRENGTHS AND LIMITATIONS
ASK FOR HELP Accepting help from others isn’t always easy. But, as your loved one goes through treatment, and more challenges are added to your plate, it is important to remember that accepting help for yourself also will help your loved one. People want to help, but many don’t know what you need or how to offer it. Ask for what you need and for those things that would be most helpful to you.
Many caregivers say that, looking back, they took too much on themselves. They often say they wish they had asked for help sooner. Take an honest look at what you can do, and what you can’t do. Ask yourself, what things am I good at? What do I need to take care of myself? What can I ask others to help with? Be willing to let go of the things that aren’t essential for you to do. Focus your energy on the things you can control. This could mean: • Helping schedule doctor visits • Maintaining a record of all medical appointments (scans, blood tests, etc.) • Learning more about melanoma and treatment options • Maintaining a list of your household’s weekly tasks and activities
Lotsa Helping Hands (www.lotsahelpinghands.com)
is a free service that provides families with an organized means of answering the question “What can I do to help?” Your private online community can help you: • Organize meal deliveries, rides to appointments and visits from friends and family members • Arrange for help with household chores such as cooking, cleaning, shopping, yard work, dog walking and childcare • Easily communicate and share updates using announcements, message boards and photos CaringBridge (www.caringbridge.org) is another free service that allows families to stay connected by providing free personalized patient websites.
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