WAG MORE, BARK LESS: LEARNING TO FIND HAPPINESS KARLENE BELYEA, MBA (continued) Just as negative people can influence
some of their words back to them) to make sure the person knows they have your full attention. If you listen to them, they are much more likely to listen to you. Use “I” statements rather than “you” statements. The word “you” can imply that you are placing blame and people become defensive. Also, practice the pause; before judging, accusing or reacting harshly. 6 IMPROVE MORALE AT WORK It’s estimated that we spend 90,000 hours of our lives at work. Consequently, we want to enjoy our jobs and the people we work with. Here are a few ways to do that: • Celebrate successes and little victories. • Recognize, reward and surprise people. • Add fun to meetings. • Treat mistakes as opportunities to improve and involving people in problem solving. • Show gratitude (specifically). • Use fist bumps, elbow bumps, and high fives. • Tell staff to leave work at work. • Create a monthly calendar with a different focus each month. The focus could be on gratitude, breathing for stress reduction, inspirational quotes, nutrition, hydration, celebrating obscure holidays, creating a work-free zone, mindfulness, physical fitness, volunteering, sleep hygiene, or promoting self-care.
our brain, so too can we influence them. One way to do this is to try using a positive power lead. The first sentence spoken in any conversation sets the tone for the conversation. A power lead says you’re in a positive space and nudges others to look for something positive to say. You can start meetings with a gratitude power lead or emails by saying something like, “I hope you’re doing well.” You can also start conversations by giving a compliment. If you are with a negative person, try to speak first to set the tone. 5 RESOLVE CONFLICTS QUICKLY Conflicts are inevitable at work; what matters is how you resolve them. Always use facts versus judgements. Here are a couple examples: • Judgement: “You are always late and not very reliable.” vs. Fact: “We started our meeting today at 8:30 and you weren’t here. This is the 2nd time this week that has occurred.” • Judgement: “You really need to keep your cool with clients.” vs. Fact: “I heard you raise your voice with Mrs. Smith this morning. Let’s talk about how to better handle her next time.” When having a conflict, begin conversations from a place of curiosity and respect. Ask open-ended questions and listen with an open mind. Try reflective listening (saying
Remember that life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness. Create positive change by putting yourself first, meditating, exercising, doing random acts of kindness, making social investments, letting go of perfectionism and learning to say “no”.
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