APPLYING WHAT YOU LEARNED: ASSIGNMENT #2 - Breaking Down Conflict (Part 1) At some stage during your day, you will face conflict with your spouse. Using the three implications from Session 2, review your own heart and why you started or entered into conflict. 1. All marriage problems are heart problems: Conflict happens not primarily because of situation, location, or communication, but because of idolatry and worship. What did this conflict reveal about your idols? How could your response have been different if your heart was ruled by worship of Christ?
2. Lasting change in your marriage will always travel through the pathway of the heart: It’s typical to try to find a solution after a conflict arises or make steps to avoid the same conflict in the future. What “apple-nailing” solutions looked enticing? Why would those solutions eventually fail? What needs to be the ultimate solution for change?
3. I am my biggest marriage problem - it’s me: Without a doubt, you will be sinned against in your marriage, but you still bring your own sin into conflict. How did you sin in this conflict, and how could you have responded differently, in a Christ-like manner, regardless of the sin of your spouse?
PERSONAL REFLECTION: Do I tend to blame my spouse and examine their heart more than I own my sin and examine my idolatry and motives? What makes me angry in everyday life? What does this anger reveal about my idolatry and worship? Do I need to call a Christian brother or sister for marriage help? Why might I be afraid to reach out for help?
Supplemental Reading: WDYE Chapter 5
Luke 18:9-14 Luke 19:1-10
END OF SESSION
2. The Biggest Problem 12
APPLYING WHAT YOU LEARNED: These Applying What You Learned “homework sections” are only discussed aloud in the Opening Discussion of Session 7 and Session 10. If you find extra time in your meetings, or if you meet for longer than 60 minutes, consider giving participants an opportunity to share their “homework answers” aloud with the group (or gender-specific group). If time is limited and no opportunities present themselves to discuss the Applying What You Learned homework, still encourage the participants on the importance of these application assignments. It’s very important that we be vigilant about our hearts and take the destructive nature of our own sin seriously.
2. The Biggest Problem 13
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